from
SUSAN & PAUL BRAUN
The Braun Family Holiday Bill of Rights
We the people of the Braun family of Pagosa Court in Aurora, Colorado, in order to form the perfect holiday newsletter, establish a sense of parody, insure people will read it, provide information about our past year, promote a sense of humor, and secure the blessings of gingerbread houses, fruit cake and connections with friends, family, and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Holiday Bill of Rights and Newsletter for 2001.
Article 1: Health Status as well as Current and Future Number of Braun Family
Members
Section 1: It shall be the expectation of a holiday newsletter to state both the obvious and any really big news at the beginning of the celebratory publication.
Section 2: Therefore, be it hereby known from the purple mountains majesty to the amber waves of grain, that everybody is healthy here. By everybody here, we are including, but not limiting our family to: Paul, Susan, Emma, Abigail, and a new addition, to arrive on or about early February 2002.
Section 3: Yes, for those re-reading Section 2, because you had not heard... The Pagosa Court Brauns are expecting another child. Susan is feeling fine, for being in her seventh month. And, to answer the question everyone is asking... it is only one, with no chance of twins. Emma & Abby think it is really neat to have a new baby coming, while Paul & Susan are looking forward to finding out what it is like with only one, instead of two. They seem to have some problems counting.
Section 4: Of course, nothing herein should be construed in any way to imply that the family dog, Mandy, is not considered a family member and is also healthy. However, her inclusion in this section 4, and not section 2, is to indicate that her status should not take precedence over the aforementioned new baby.
Article 2: The solemn responsibility of a holiday newsletter is to share cute and pithy stories about kids.
Section 1: If children are in a family, then it is a holiday newsletter publishing right and, indeed, duty to share stories about these aforesaid children, proving that the children are indeed cute, endearing and deserving of newsletter space. It is in this purely amusing way that small children earn their keep.
Section 2: Emma and Abby turned four earlier this month. Their busy schedule includes: two days each week in a morning pre-school; swimming classes; gymnastics classes; and religion classes. Time also is made for play dates and performing elaborate singing, dancing and giggling shows for their parents.
Section 3: Big events for Emma and Abby this year included moving to a larger bedroom and to big-kids bunk beds; being Disney princesses for Halloween (Emma was Snow White & Abby was Sleeping Beauty,); deciding that they have babies in their tummies like Mommy.; and hold their own D.A. R meetings in the closet of their parents. These meetings include mandatory cookies.
Section 4: The newest adventure for kids and parents alike is the search for a school. Having decided that Catholic school is the way we want to go, we are cruising Catholic schools with pre-K programs on the east side of Denver. If anyone has any suggestions, please let Paul or Susan know.
Article 3: Real holiday newsletters are dedicated to the proposition that no information can be too mundane.
Section 1: Well, Paul still works at Time Warner Cable National Division and still collects quotations. His collection is up to
over 5,000.
Section 2: Susan is still active in the Daughters of the American Revolution. So if you want any American flag jewelry or other patriot stuff, call her. She is selling it. She also has been trying to frenetically catch up on the kid scrapbooks, knowing that next year there will be little time for pasting memories.
Section 3: One non-mundane item is that Paul once again was part of the creative team for the annual Positively Cable musical review. This year the event, called The Technical Trials of Our Sweet Cablene, raised one hundred and six thousand dollars. At the event, Paul was surprised when he was presented with the Brad Wojcoski Memorial Award from Cable Positive. This award recognizes the individual, company or organization in the cable community that has contributed most significantly to the fight against AIDS. This is really kind of a cool award for writing silly songs.
Section 4: The family was able to take a few trips this year including: an east coast familial and convention tour of New York, Reading, PA and Washington DC; there was about a week at the house on Gull Lake in Michigan where Susan spent great times as a little girl; about six days in Disney World; and a few days at the Colorado SpringsBroadmoor Hotel. Of it all, the part the girls say what they like best is the cart that comes to the room with food.
Section 5: For those of you who have had received previous newsletters, you know of the Braun family tradition of reporting on the status of the brown, Naugahyde chair in each holiday newsletter. This is still a cherished institution. Be it known that this chair, the one that Paul had since before he was married, is, to this day, still sitting in our living room. Thus, the American value system has been preserved.
Article 4: Miscellaneous - He said, She said; the Internet; Photos; and Contact Information
Section 1: Still another tradition of the Braun annual newsletter is the long-established feature called, She Said, He Said. She (meaning Susan) said we should try to do a less complicated newsletter than last year. You know, just black and white, maybe no photos. He said (that would be Paul, the only male in the household), sure we can do a simple newsletter, thinking in the back of his mind of an elaborate mailing package and maybe putting some pictures on the Internet,
Section 2: There is a new web address if you like to come visit us electronically. Go to www.theBrauns. org. If we can get organized, there may be something new on it, like photos from the past year, or maybe some quotes from the collection that Paul has.
Section 3: Contact information for the Brauns of Pagosa Court, Aurora Colorado is: 1646 South Pagosa Court, Aurora Colorado 80017-5276. Our phone number is 303-671-0648. If you want to catch Paul at the office, his number is 303-649-8013. Email for Paul is PaulBraun@aol.com and email for Susan is SCNBraun@attbi.com. Please feel to get a hold of us.
Article 5: Our wish to you for the peace and hope of the season and the conditions under which it is given
Section 1: May the good will of the season let us all share kindness through the whole year, with the parameters as established in section 2.
Section 2: By accepting this greeting, you accept that it is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any part of a wish to yourself or others and void if prohibited by law. The wish is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform within usual applications of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of the wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
We, therefore, the Members of the Brauns of Pagosa Court of Aurora, Colorado, Assembled, appealing to the Spirit of the Season, do, in the Name of Holiday Tradition, solemnly publish and declare, this to be our Holiday Newsletter and Bill of Holiday Rights for 2001.
