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Today, just as any other day, I sat down to try to write to you, my readers... But the inspiration did not come to me. Sometimes it vanishes, disappears and make me feel unable to write. I stood up and decided to go for a walk in the neighborhood to try to find something that could inspire me to write, something I did not know what could be... You know when you have this sinking feeling, not knowing what to say? So, although it was a beautiful sunny and hot day outside, sparkling blue skies, she (the inspiration) was hiding somewhere and did not want to come out. But I knew that sooner or later she would show up.
I went out and while I was walking along, she slowly started coming out, in a different shape. First a car went zooming next to me and I remembered how much we rush around, always in a hurry and sometimes this is the reason why we don't have time to look inside ourselves for a while and see that we can dedicate a little of our time to look for something to inspire us...
I sat by the lake and while I was contemplating some geese and swans quietly swimming, my mind flew to where they were and I wished I could swim... and fly... and go towards the feeling of freedom, trespassing borders, rivers and oceans, flying towards myself.
I looked to the same blue sky and there heavy clouds started to appear in the horizon and I realized how often human beings allow that dark clouds to take over our minds and souls and we don't do anything to blow them away, allowing our sky to be cluttered with clouds only because we don't know how to forgive, because we don't have the courage to apologize, because we don't believe in true friendship, and don't value whatever is given to us freely...
Fearing it would start raining any time, I took the same way back and once again the inspiration came to tell me how many times we let fear take over us and how much we lack the courage to face the situations as they are, and how we don't stick until we can face the consequences, and we don't give a chance to life to take its natural course, as we constantly hear the persistent voice of fear. Many times, this fear makes us miss a lot of opportunities and, in my case, it was preventing me from staying there admiring that beautiful landscape...
In a few minutes that I went out to look for something to inspire me, I realized that inspiration is inside ourselves and whatever makes it show up is only our own capacity to read in the small and simple things around us... it is our ability of feeling the world turning round... of perceiving that time passes at each second... and to try with this same turning world and this passing time to use our imagination and grow, notice, feel, see, find what we have been looking for... And thus I came here and managed to tell you, readers, a little of what I could perceive in only a few minutes that I allowed myself while I was looking for some inspiration. And you, have you looked for her today? You don't need to go too far, you just need to look inside yourselves!
* Published in the Brazilian Times Newspaper, Boston, January 2, 2001
* Published in the Brazilian Sun, Miami, March 3, 2001
Translated by Thereza Christina Rocque da Motta