Don't like it….? Click it off.

THE PROUD SEDUCER

A guy goes into confession and says to the priest, "Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchildren, and last night I had an affair, and I made love to two 18 year old girls. Both of them. Twice."

The priest said: "Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?"

"Never Father, I'm Jewish."

"So then, why are you telling me?"

"I'm telling everybody."

*****

Man's Sex Life
It seems that when God was making the world, he called man over and bestowed upon him twenty years of normal sex life. Man was horrified. "Only twenty years of normal sex life?" but the Lord was very adamant. That was all man could have.

Then the Lord called the monkey and gave him twenty years. "But I don't need twenty years," he protested, "Ten is plenty for me."

Man spoke up eagerly, "Can I have the other ten?"

The monkey graciously agreed.

Then the Lord called the lion and gave him twenty years, and the lion, like the monkey wanted only ten. Again the man spoke up, "Can I have the other ten?"

The lion said of course he could.

Then came the donkey and he was given twenty years - but like the others, ten was sufficient.

Again man pleaded, "Can I have the other ten?"

This explains why man has twenty years of normal sex life, plus ten years of monkeying around, ten years of lion about it .... and ten years of making an ass of himself.

*****

Nudists
A old man goes to a nudist colony and asks the director if he can look around before joining. The director agrees. The old man walks around and sees the most beautiful woman. Much to his embarrassment he gets an erection. The woman goes up to him and gives he fantastic oral sex. The old man runs back to the director and tells him to sign him up immediately.

After finishing all the paperwork and paying for a lifetime membership, the old man goes back out. He looks around a suddenly drops his cigar. From behind him a young man jumps out and begins to give him anal sex.

When the young man is finished the old man runs back to the director and tells him to tear up the paperwork - he does not want to join.

The director says "I don't understand, 5 minutes ago you wanted to join for life.

Well, said the old man, at my age, I get an erection once a month, but I drop my cigar at least 5 times a day!

Click here to go back to page 9.
Click here to go back to page 1 or hit your back button above.


Get your own Geocities Free Home Page