* Editorial
* Links to help sites
* Story from a survivor
* Questions and Answers
* Words of Encouragement
As we are looking into another month and our third issue of the Abuse Newsletter, I just have to say "Praise God" for those ladies who have come to me. You have been such a blessing to me. I am so thankful that we can share our cares, concerns, prayers and burdens. I have come to know you well and care so much for you all. God is Good! In the middle of adversity, he intervenes and lifts us up through those who serve and love Him. As we continue to help each other through the guidance of our Lord, let us all join together in saying "We give You the glory, the honor and the praise for all that has come from our trials. The blessings that we have found through You! Praise be to the Father!" I love you all!
Christian Counseling, Self-Help and Support
Christian Counseling Ministries
Kathy's Site : Information on Abuse, Assault, Rape
I am in search of more sites to place here. Please be patient as i want to look at each site to be sure thast its content is what each of you need. If you have an urgent need, please email me and I will promptly repsond with the information that you need. Remember that you are loved and cared for. There IS help for you. Please just let me know. God bless you all.
My story is not unlike other stories; nor is it any worse, better. But it is the story of a woman abused, depressed, feeling hopeless, and who has overcome and survived...by the Mercy and Grace of God.
As a child, I was the picture of a happy, healthy, normal seven year-old. No one knew the secrets I held in my little heart. The secrets of how my sitter's sixteen year-old son had been sexually molesting me since I was six. This continued until I was almost eight.
It probably would have lasted longer, if my mother hadn't decided that we were moving.
I told no one.
As a young woman, I found myself in a very uncomfortable situation. Wanting to leave. It was too late...I couldn't. I endured the most devisating rape. The smell of liquor and words still haunt me...but I survived. Though bearing the responsibility of yet another secret.
I married, had three beautiful children. Picture perfect family and marriage. Three years into our seven-year-long marriage, I found that my husband had been having affairs since day one. This discovery, along with the secrets I had buried in my heart and soul, caused me to withdraw inside myself. My husband was verbally abusive and I felt that I was nothing. I could never make it on my own.
I was experiencing severe depression and lost weight - down to 93 pounds. Had it not been for my children and my love for God, I surely would have taken my life.
I felt it was time to tell the secrets of my childhood and the rape. I confided in my husband..in some hope of his being ubderstanding and this strengthening our marriage. He left me. When he came back it was to never be mentioned again. I also confided in my mother...who seemed angry for what had happened. I thought that she would be there for me...but I got the same feelings from her. Silence was best.
Resigned to the fact that no one really cared, I withdrew even deeper inside myself. My husband continued his affairs, verbal abuse and a hard-knock during a discussion over why he wouldn't take the garbage out. I stayed.
After some time, prayers and being able to confide in a dear friend...I decided that I had to leave. I filed for divorce and moved out, taking our children.
Though I am writing and extremely brief account of my story, what I want you to know is that even in the darkest times, we are never ever alone. Jesus is waiting to embrace us. Love us. Shelter us in His undying, unconditional love.
Being a divorced mother has been extremely hard, but we are on our way up! My children are so much happier. I can face the day without dread or fear.
My ex-husband is remarried. How his relationship is with his new wife is not known to me. On the outside they seem happy and everything seems fine...as it did with our marriage. I really pray that their marriage is happy and that he has learned from the past. I continue to pray for him..though I really do not want to. But as a Christian, it is my responsibility. God knows what I feel in my heart. I constantly pray for His guidance to help me release my anger and pain.
There are so many survivors of abuse, rape, domestic violence. We must ban together and help to see that the abuse stops!
Please check out each link and webring. Gather the inormation and join in our fight to help stop abuse, rape, and domestic violence.
Since there are no questions for this month, let me place one that I have been asked several times over the past month.
Q. Why did God let this happen to me?
A. There are so many times that we do ask ourselves and our Father that question. And we have been told that we are not to question God. But you know what? He knows our heart. He knows our thoughts. He knows what we wonder. I have asked the same question...but then I had to "re-phrase" my question. Instead of accusingly asking God...I went to Him in prayer and said, "Father, I know that you do not allow anything to happen in my life that I can not handle. Father, You know the difficult time that I am having in dealing with this abuse. Father, please strengthen me and help me to be patient for Your answer. To be patient in all things. To know and trust and let it be enough that You are in control. Father, we all need You and in times like these is when we often feel most alone. But we are NEVER alone. You are always with us. If we can not feel Your embrace, it is because you are holding our hand. If we can not feel you touching our hand, it is because You are reaching out for our hearts. Father, the glory and praise be all Yours. Thank you for the blessings in the midst of the storms. In my Brother's name I pray, AMEN."
I can not say how many times I have prayed that prayer or one like it. I am as guilty as anyone of questioning God. But dear brothers and sisters, God is Good. He is faithful and just. He is all we need. He will always be what we need....in good times and bad. Trials bring stronger faith and patience if we only let go...and let God.
Abuse brings on so many different emotions. Here are some verses to help in some different areas. I have more if you need them before the next newsletter. Please do not hesitate to email me.
1) LIFT YOUR SPIRITS....
"I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help." Psalm 121:1
Monitor your moods
Think of the sun
Clear your mind
2) HANDLE YOUR MISTAKES....
"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." John 8:32
Learn from your mistakes
Replace error with Truth
Eliminate the cause
3) UN-LIMIT YOURSELF....
"Nothing shall be impossible unto you." Matthew 17:20
Believe in your potential
Nothing is impossible
Break the limitaiton barrier
4) BANISH WORRY....
"Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee." Psalm 55:22
Replace worry
Take worry apart
Rise above worry
5) FEAR NO MORE....
"I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears." Psalm 34:4
Practice affirmation
Stand up to fear
Let fear motivate you
6)SOLVE YOUR PROBLEM!....
"In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." John 16:33
Think deep thoughts
Clear your mind
Use creative silence
FishNet ~ Websites of Interest to Christians
Goshen ~ Global Online Service Helping Evangelize Nations
For information on Full Circle~A Southern Baptist Gospel Group, please email.
This green ribbon comes from Holli's Triumph Over Tragedy.
Please visit Holli's site and sign her questbook. She is a remarkable lady who has more courage and spark than one can imagine. God bless you Holli.
