One of the best aspects of having a creative field as large as film is that not all works are going to be "masterpieces. " That's what I love about movies--sometimes they misfire. A lot of these films have 3 times the charm when you've played them over and over. Here are some of my personal favorites. I like to call them "undiscovered classics," but for now they are just.....

BAD MOVIES I LOVE

BACK TO SCHOOL
If you don't like this, you're nuts. Why is it that all Rodney Dangerfield movies are just so bad that they're good? Quote: "Bring a pitcher of beer every ten minutes until somebody passes out. Then bring one every 20 minutes." Side note: My friend tried to do the Triple Lindy once in our backyard pool and broke her leg. She wasn't very bright to begin with. Regardless of your IQ, be sure to visit the way cool Rodney Dangerfield Page! Have fun!

DEEP BLUE SEA
This is one great BAD movie! Renny Harlin does a great job making an almost-as-good-as-JAWS movie about killer sharks. Of course, these sharks are part of an experiment to halt Alzheimer's disease. Through the course of various tests the sharks got....smarter. Add a cast of virtual unknowns and lots of blood and killer sharks and you've got a great movie! This is one of the best 'action/suspense' films I've ever seen, and it sure does keep you on the edge of your seat the entire time.

THE LEGEND OF BILLIE JEAN
The "ultimate" cheezy movie, this 80s "adventure" tale follows the trek of a redneck trailer-trash girl and friends' run from "the Law." When bad boy Hubie trashes Billie Jean's little brother's motor scooter (I am not making this up!), Billie Jean gets tough and a gun accidentally goes off. Totally implausible and utterly stereotypical, you might be embarrassed to rent this one. (But you'll like it). Go ahead--give in. Visit the Billie Jean Movie Page for more info.

MIDNIGHT MADNESS
Another pseudo-road movie, this one's about five teams of teenagers on a late-night treasure hunt who must decipher nutty clues (i.e., "The Sea Is Reversed. S.S. ITARI is mixed up and blind..."). It's very sterotypical, with the Nerd team, the Fat Kid team, the Cool Kid team, and the Drunk Jock team. But it's one of my all time bad movie favorites. Great scenes include the Pabst Blue Ribbon beer vat scene (where we tried to visit on the road trip) and the nerds-on-motorcycles chase to the finish line. "M-E-A-T M-A-C-H-I-N-E....MEATMACHINE! MEATMACHINE!" Rent it if you can. If your video store has it, consider yourself lucky. It's hard to find! Are there any other "Midnight Madness" fans out there? Please write and let yourself be known! It's nothing to be ashamed of! NEWSFLASH! The Unofficial "MM" Fan Club is now ONLINE! Come check us out!

SUMMER SCHOOL
They just don't make teen movies like they used to, do they? I think I can recite this one by heart. (If you can't, go rent the movie and learn some lines already)! Make no mistake, Summer School is a classic. Good tip: the melon ball fireworks that Chainsaw and Dave make for Anna Maria really do work. But make sure you don't light them within 100 miles of any important life form (not that I'm encouraging this behavior, kids). Check out the IMDB's Summer School page. Quote: "You were a black Marine in Vietnam?" "The war puts a man through many, many changes."

CADDYSHACK
Another classic with Rodney, and a film that is perfecty "reciteable." I can't think of another movie in the history of mankind with better lines than CADDYSHACK. It is truly a Cinderella Story. Plus, once you see it, you'll never look at a Baby Ruth in the same way again

BACHELOR PARTY
"Is this the footlong?" ...."And THEN some!!" Why can't Tom Hanks make good movies like he used to? One of the all-around funniest bad movies ever made. This one's even funny when it is edited for t.v.! Wow! This one has everything: sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll, toilet humor....everything you could ever ask for in a bad movie. And everytime I think about the mule and the counter full of drugs I give myself the hiccups. Check out my NEW Bachelor Party Fan Site for cool links, photos, and more!

PCU
I HATED this movie when I first saw it, but now I can't get enough! This is one of the funniest bad college movies ever made! The sad thing is, it's kinda true, too! Check it out!

BASEketball
Don't dismiss this one yet! It is sooo funny! This movie probably has a higher gag-per-second ration than Naked Gun! Parker and Stone, the South Park guys, have created a great comedy movie that is sure to offend everyone. Please check this one out.

BEER
While we're on the subject....I just recently discovered this rental "classic." We rented this during that huge snowstorm back in January of '96, and since we were stuck inside, that's all we had to watch. It definitely grows on you. If you watch it, remember to "Whip Out Your Norbecker."

GREASE 2
The sequel is so much better than the original. Michelle Pfeiffer sings! The songs are very memorable, ("We're gonna scooooore tonight....") the dance numbers are great. And the soundtrack ranks as one of my favorite albums of all time! I know how hard it is to find; if you would like a copy, e-mail me. Check out the new Son of Grease tribute page, an awe-inspiring site with lots of Grease 2 photos, cast list, and a few links. Definitely worth your time, if only for a little "campiness." (Note to all those original GREASE fans who have written me nasty letters to say that GREASE 2 sucks: this is just my personal OPINION, and remember--it's only a MOVIE! Geez! Don't be so protective! What is WRONG with you people)?

POLICE ACADEMY 3
My favorite POLICE ACADEMY movie by far. This is the one where they're back in training. There are laughs a'plenty, as well as a cool action sequence on jet skis. Yes, it's moronic, but isn't that what great entertainment is all about?

PRISCILLA, QUEEN OF THE DESERT
This is a totally ridiculous movie that always seems to capture my attention (and won't let go)! Every time I see this movie I succumb to it--I can't move. I must watch it. In its entirety. The tale of gay male cross-dressing lip synchers on a journey in a delapidated bus through the Austrailian desert is one of the weirdest films to come along in a while...but it's a guilty pleasure, if only for the outrageous costumes.

CANNONBALL RUN 1 AND 2
What can I say...I have this thing for road movies. I've always wanted to race in a Cannonball. I'd go with the ambulance thing, or maybe the general's car. (You can listen to some Cannonball Run sounds at this site). There's something in each Cannonball Run to offend everyone: naked women, transvestites, religious jokes, racial slurs, alcoholism, stereotypes...everything! If you're easily offended by this stuff GET OVER IT ALREADY! Enjoy these movies for what they are--mindless fun. The thing that's so great about these films is simple: where else can you find Jackie Chan, Telly Savalas, and Frank Sinatra together? Nowhere, baby! (Don't miss the outtakes during the credits, either). Thank god Burt Reynolds is making a comeback. The world needs more of him.

THE FIRM
I don't think I necessarily think this is such a "bad" movie, but apparently lots of people do, and that's why it's included here. I guess it's too difficult for people to believe that the Quaker Oats guy is a hard-ass mobster. Oh well. It's still entertaining, and I happen to like it. Who can resist a film with the tagline, "Power can be murder to resist"? Lawyers and money and power are sexy! And Gene Hackman is great, as always.

REVENGE OF THE NERDS
Gilbert and Lewis kick some snotty-jocks' asses and take names. How could you not love it? Everybody has a favorite scene... (Mine's the Rush party scene). Stay away from NERDS 2, 3 & 4, though. Don't say I didn't warn you! My favorite quote: "Why do they call you Booger?" "I don't know....."

HOT SHOTS
"Damn, my cap blew off. Swing'er around. Let's go pick it up." This is one funny damn movie. Somehow it's not hard for me to imagine that Lloyd Bridges' skin is made of asbestos......You might want to steer clear of HOT SHOTS DEUX, though. It's basically lame. Here's a big page of Hot Shots Quotes.

This page was last updated on March 21, 2000.

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