CHAPTER 10
A muscular, bandaged arm was draped across Emma’s body, and an equally muscular, though unbandaged, leg was draped across her legs. They both lay on their stomachs, the appendages in question above the covers. Just enough of the blanket covered Reil’s backside and her other leg. A candle, it’s drippings filling the holder, tossed it’s fitful light across the two bodies. Both were sound asleep.
Flo had waited to enter the room, knowing full well the two did not need an audience. As soon as it was reasonably safe to assume that she would not catch them unawares, she quietly knocked. Getting no response, she cautiously peeked into the room, and saw that the two were sleeping soundly. Her original plan was to tell them dinner was ready, but she didn’t have the heart to wake them up. It had been too long, she thought, since her Emma had let someone into her life.
Flo figured the woman more than deserved a little happiness. It had been too long since she had seen such a peaceful look on Emma’s face. The fact that this small slip of a man had caused it only helped endear him closer to Flo’s heart. This man had risked so much already, all for a woman he hardly knew. From what Jimmy had told her, the Colonel was Reil’s father. Such a horrible thing to have happen, she mused as she quietly lit a fire to take the chill off the room. And to one so young. She gave a mental tsk. Oh, the twists and turns of war, she thought, if only things were simpler.
She looked once again at the two forms, blissfully sleeping, and thought, well...there’s something simple right there...true love. She softly closed the door behind her and went to take the roast of meat out of the cast iron oven. She would keep it warm for them, knowing that the young soldier’s appetite would probably get them both up before long.
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True to Flo’s thoughts, Reil was the first to awaken. A lazy stretch produced a slight twinge in her arm, but taking that for a good sign, she paid it no mind and wrapped herself once more around the woman who had become the most important thing in her life. She let her gaze linger on the sleeping form, drinking in every detail. So beautiful, so...real. Letting her thoughts linger on that for long moments, she wished she didn’t have to leave...ever.
Reil knew that the information her father had blurted out the night before needed to get back to her commander. It wasn’t much, but it was important enough for her father, even in his drunken state, to mention it. That made it important enough for her. She finally pulled her eyes away from Emma, and glanced about the room. Both her and Emma’s clothes had been picked up from whence they had been tossed earlier, and a small fire was merrily blazing away, the soft pops and hisses comforting in a way that only a fire can be. It was dark outside, causing her to wonder what hour it was. Guessing by the amount the candle had burned down, several hours had passed since they had fallen asleep. She gently nudged her sleeping companion.
Slowly, Emma opened her bleary eyes and turned over on her back. Reil almost forgot what she was about to say, so taken was she with the sight before her. Emma gave her a quizzical look, seeing the womans’ mouth hanging open. “Did you wake me out of a sound sleep just so I could watch you catch flies?” She leaned over and gave the gaping woman a quick kiss. Reil closed her mouth. “By all that is good in this world, you are beautiful.” Emma gave a languorous stretch, causing the blondes’ face to flush at the thoughts running through her head. “Well, you’ll catch more than flies with words like that.” She leaned over once more and stole another kiss, enjoying the emotions playing across Reils’ face.
Long moments later, Reil finally found her breath and voiced that which she had originally intended. “Someone’s been here.” Emma looked thoughtful, then replied. “As in, someone’s been sleeping in my bed? I would say that is accurate.” A playful smile crossed her face, there was just something so intrinsically right about teasing the young woman. Like she had been doing it all her life, and then some. She put it down to just another aspect of their deep connection. “No silly! I mean, literally, someone has been here. I don’t recall us taking the time to light a fire, much less carefully arrange our clothes!” Emma sat up, looking around. Indeed, someone had been in the room while they slept. “Don’t worry, it was probably just Flo. She’s been doing that since I was little. Taking care of the small things like that...I guess I’m just used to it.”
Reil turned bright red. “You mean...she saw me...well...naked?” The woman looked like she would pass out at any moment. Emma drew her in and held her close. “Don’t worry, I’m sure she was discreet. Besides, we had the blanket over us, remember?” Reil let her thoughts collect themselves, then slowly began to relax. She was sure the aggressive woman would have woken her up immediately, had she realized her gender. It would have been a repeat of the previous evening, but with probably much dire consequences.
Not getting a response, Emma became concerned. “You alright? I was going to ask you if I could tell Flo...about you. But if it upsets you this much, then letting it alone is best.” In reality, Reil had just become too comfortable once again in the taller womans’ embrace. “I know you’re close to her, but I’d rather you didn’t tell her. If you remember correctly, you agreed to be my wife. I don’t think she would take it that kindly were she to find out my true identity.” Emma hadn’t thought of that. Reil had a point. Flo was a wonderful, loving woman, but everybody had their ideas on two women loving each other. It was few and far between that you would expect to find those that had no problem with the arrangement.
“Oh, no, I haven’t forgotten about that, but I think you’re right. Even after knowing her all these years, I don’t think I know her well enough to be able to predict how she’ll react. There’ll be time to tell her later, if need be.” Saying this, she climbed out of bed, moving towards her clothes. “Hey, I was warm here a second ago!” came Reil’s mock indignant reply. “Sorry, love. I’m hungry. And so are you.” The timing couldn’t have been better as Reil’s stomach promptly concurred. “Aw, heck.” Reil knew this wasn’t the first time her grumbling tummy had betrayed her. She was notorious in her unit for out-eating most everyone. Except that one big hulk of a guy in Co. D., she thought with a mental wry grin. She climbed out of bed and began dressing also.
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Dinner was eaten in almost silence, the only real chatter coming from Flo. She went on and on about how dinner was almost spoiled, how you can only cook something so long before it wasn’t food anymore, and more along that vein. Throughout the tirade, however, she kept piling more food on each plate, bringing out more food to set on the table, and generally stating through her actions that she was happy to see the two with such a good appetite. Flo marveled at how the two could eat, given what had gone on that morning. But then she realized, suddenly, what probably caused the appetites, and put it all down to youthful exuberance. Lord, she thought to herself, can’t remember as ever being that young, to take so much in stride.
After dinner, Reil wanted to check one more time on her horse. Taking a lantern to light the way, she made her way to the stable where she found Jimmy bedding down the horses for the night. She noticed for the first time that a large black stallion was in the stall next to Alcaeus. She pushed away unwanted thoughts as Jimmy spoke up. “Evenin’ sir. Hope you don’t mind none, but I took your horse out for a short run. She rides like the wind!” Reil patted the horse in question on the nose. “No, Jimmy, that’s fine. You’ve taken real good care of her. Thanks.” The young man ducked his head, “Shucks, was a pleasure.” She clapped the young man on the shoulder and gave him a grin. Reil figured she liked the man, was glad that Emma had him to help out around the place.
“Oh, Lieutenant. I almost forgot.” He dashed up the stairs to his loft. Reil looked up and could see that he had a nice place set up, with a bed in the corner and a small braizier for heat. She supposed in the truely cold winter months he shared space with Flo over in her cottage. He came back down the wooden steps with a small gray bundle in his arms. “I took the liberty of collecting the Colonel’s personal effects. Thought you might want them.” He held out the bundle for her to take.
Reil held the items in her hands, looking down at them, and wondered if she had ever really known her father at all. It seemed his whole life had been reduced to one small bundle. She had known he was unhappy with her mother, resented her even. He had told Rock that if it hadn’t been for Reil, he would have left the woman a long time ago. As it was, it seems he took the only way out that would afford him some dignity. He enlisted.
If anyone had asked Reil which side her father might have chosen to fight for, she would have said neither side. Her father had always been a level headed man, not prone to involve himself in the fights of others. But something had pushed him, and she knew what it was. Every time her father had gone on a business trip, her mother had paraded yet another boyfriend through their house. Reil figured her father had finally found out. By the way he had been ranting before he was shot, the young woman figured he had been pretty badly treated since she had last seen him. Something had snapped, and that instability had eventually led him on a path that none could have foreseen. In her mother’s own petty, sideways style, she had managed to steal yet another piece of her childhood memories. Her father had never drank, never cursed, and certainly was no spy. Not in Reil’s mind anyway.
She carefully set the bundle down on a bale of hay and opened up the blanket that the items were wrapped in. A small bible, some notepaper, stamps, quill and ink, shaving kit and sword were all that were there. Lifting up the notepaper, she realized there was also a bundle of letters. She flipped through them, some addressed to her, others to Rock, all pre-dated. “Lieutenant? There’s also his tack, riding blanket and saddlebags. Will you be taking the horse?” Jimmy was trying to be tactful, but feared that he was failing miserably. Seeing the look on his face, Reil tried to reassure him that he had said nothing wrong. “I’ll have a talk with Emma about selling the horse. You can all split the money from it.” She thought about that some more, remembering how Emma’s family had died. Reil struggled for a solution. “No, I have a better idea, Jimmy. I’ll take him with me, sell him on my way back to camp. I’ll send the money back here...”
The young man was grateful, the memories of that horrible day were still fresh in his mind. She reached down and picked up the sword from the blanket. “Here, Jimmy. I want you to have this. It’ll be some story to tell your grandkids about one day.” The young mans’ eyes opened wide, reverently taking the sword from Reil. “Really? Oh, but I can’t take that, sir. It just wouldn’t be right.” He tried to hand the sword back to Reil, but she gently pushed it back into his grip. “It’s more thanks than I can give you for the help you’ve been. And you’ve taken such good care of Alcaeus. It would make me feel better if you had it.”
Reil picked up the bundle of letters, tucking them into her jacket pocket. She would deliver those addressed to Rock, and read her own later...maybe. Something told her that she would know the contents already. Letters had arrived from him on a fairly regular basis, given the conditions mail had to traverse to get to her. They were all basically the same. No news, things were fine, business moving along, well wishes and the like. She supposed he mailed them first to her mother, so that they would appear to be coming from Texas. Originally, she had blamed the mail service when she had gotten sometimes four or five letters at once. Now she just blamed it on her mothers indifference, saving herself the bother and just mailing them all at once. Carefully she wrapped up the rest of the belongings, handing them to Jimmy.
“Here you go. I’m sure an extra blanket will come in handy, and you can do what you want with the other things. Makes no difference to me. You’ll have to either bury or hide the tack and bags...including the horse blanket. It’ll be harder for me to explain trying to sell CSA marked items.” Reil knew she would have a bit of trouble selling the horse as it was. Virginia was a Confederate state, although it was heavily occupied by Northern troops. But being in the middle, as it was, it would be a simple matter of finding a sympathizer who dealt in horse trade, and selling the stallion. It seemed she would have to talk to Emma after all, regarding the horse.
Jimmy only nodded in agreement and watched reflectively as the lieutenant strode out of the barn. He was somewhat in shock at the calm collected manner in which the young officer decided the fate of the items which had formerly belonged to the man’s father. He both admired and feared such a man who could kill his own kin, then go on about business. Deep down, Jimmy knew that the lieutenant hadn’t started out life this way, that it had been the war which had changed him. He fervently hoped he never had to join the fighting. It was all volunteer at this point, and he hoped it stayed that way. Jimmy wasn’t afraid to fight, but he had seen too many people hurt and changed by it. He didn’t want to become someone he didn’t know.
Arriving back at the house, Reil had a brief conversation with Emma regarding the horse, with Emma agreeing that it was best for her to take it with her in the morning. Still tired, the two retired to bed. The incident in the barn had upset Reil somewhat, but it had also reinforced her belief that she needed to make the most of her time on earth. She didn’t want her personal effects to amount to one small bundle at the end of her days. That night, she poured every ounce of love and tenderness that she could into her time with Emma, wanting to leave an indelible mark upon the other woman’s memory. She need not have tried so hard, for Emma’s thoughts were along the same path. Neither knew when they would see the other again, and neither wanted to let the other go. The morning saw two women emerge, not one of whom had gotten a decent nights’ sleep.
Goodbyes were said, Flo gave Reil a parcel of food, and the woman was on her way. Emma stood watching till her love was gone from sight. An emptiness filling her almost immediately. The promises they had made just moments ago in regard to staying safe, sending letters, and most importantly, coming back, seemed as though they were made by a bystander. The words could not keep her heart from aching, or stop the tears that flowed freely down her face. The other half of her soul had gone back to war. She didn’t know if she could take losing her mate to conflict twice in one lifetime, but desperately hoped it wouldn’t come to that.
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Reil rode hard. Pushing her horse more than necessary. To her mind, the quicker she returned to her unit, the quicker this war would be over, and the sooner she could be with Emma again. The wind stung her eyes, adding to the tears that were already falling.
Halfway back to her unit, Reil came to a small town and found a man Emma had mentioned. He gladly bought the horse, and only gave her a little less than she had hoped for. While there, she ate, watered her own horse, and went on about her way. The whole interaction took less than an hour. Riding out of town, she was surprised to come upon a lone rider. As she neared, she recognized the horse, and the man seated upon it as well.
“Rock!” she called out as she came within shouting distance. The man turned in his saddle, a large smile gracing his worn face. Looking at the man who had practically raised her, she found she couldn’t do it. Couldn’t tell the man what she knew about her father. Most definitely couldn’t tell him that she had killed her father. Trusting Rock implicitly, she decided that he must have had a reason to hide her fathers activities from her...if he had known himself, that is.
It was altogether possible that Rock had been receiving the same letters that she had. The mundane, everything’s ok type. She also didn’t want to break down again, fearing that the loss of her father and her separation from Emma would cause her to be seen as weak in Rock’s eyes. She didn’t want him thinking that she was just some foolish woman to whom the trials of war had finally caught up to. Reil pushed everything from the previous day out of her mind, and greeted Rock as if nothing was amiss.
“Hey! I didn’t expect to see you yet! I figured that you’d be back with the unit by now!” Rock took a moment before answering to look Reil over. Somehow, she looked different, and it wasn’t just the glow of love that he had seen two nights ago. The woman looked like she had been through a grist mill, older, somewhat sadder. He put the thought aside, intending to ask about it later. “I was held up, Cronus threw a shoe. I only got as far as this town last night, and the smith couldn’t reshoe him ‘til today. I waited out the morning, just getting done about an hour ago. How are you doing? I figured you’d not be back for several days. Everything alright with Emma?”
Now Reil was in a spot. She needed to get the information passed along, but didn’t want to tell Rock about her father. She settled for the truth, just not all of it. Briefly she recounted what had happened the previous morning, leaving out the identity of the man. Rock nodded, agreeing that the information was important. He put down Reil’s appearance to having had to kill a man, it was harder when you could see their face. The two raced along making good time, and arrived back at the camp just as the sun was setting. They made their way immediately to the commanders tent.
Colonel Ellis made time to see them, listening carefully to his young lieutenants’ story. “And this woman,” he asked, “you’re sure she was a counter spy, working for the North?” Reil nodded, in truth, she wasn’t completely sure, but she trusted Emma to have told her the truth. “Did she say who she reports to in the Federal army?” Reil thought back, then answered, “No sir, things happened pretty quickly, and I wanted to get back with the news as soon as possible.” The commander asked a few more questions, sorting out the facts, then dismissed the two. Reil left his tent without being reassured that her message had been taken as seriously as she had hoped. Less than a week later, she would find out just how seriously.