Serena should have known better, she continued to condemn her tears, she knew this day would come, it had to sooner or later he would find out then inevitably freak out and leave her. She knew that, she was sure of it. She hated herself for weeping over his departure, the tears she shed were the main reason she intended it only to be one night, for loving then leaving is the hardest thing.
She yanked herself up of the couch with every ounce of energy she had, which wasn’t by anyone’s stretch of the imagination – a lot. She slowly moved towards the refrigerator where she opened the door and silently scrutinized everything in it. The sound of the ringing phone broke her solemn concentration. She carelessly reached for the phone and muttered the word,
“Hello?”
“Hey” a soft familiar voice replied
She held the phone away stunned, what was he doing calling her? Was he there to rub salt in the wound?
“Kevin, what can I do for you?” she remarked biting her top lip, in forceful anguish
“I'm sorry, I never should have walked out on you like that. It was so wrong of me, I was just shocked”
“You don’t have to explain yourself”
“I need to explain how I feel. Serena, I’ve never met anyone like you, and regardless of your history, medical or otherwise, I cant and wont deny what I feel for you”
“Don’t” she whispered not wanting him to continue
“I cant believe I was shallow enough to leave you like I did, and if you could, please Serena give me another chance”
“It’s not that simple, I don’t feel any anger towards you leaving, sometimes the things we do without thinking are the things we’re destined to do. You don’t need this pain, or this trauma. You don’t need to share my problems, I'm not a charity case, I’ve been fine before, and I’ll be fine now, I don’t need you to protect me and I don’t want you to feel the need to do so”
“I don’t want to be your charity giver, I want to be your shoulder when you need to cry, I want to be the rock that you can lean on when you need that little extra strength, and I want you to be the same for me, but most of all I just want you”
She knew she was into too deep. She couldn’t handle this. She couldn’t leave some else behind when she left this world. She couldn’t hold on to a dream, fantasy, she couldn’t hold onto him.
“No, move on Kevin. Find someone else, we’re not meant to be” she quietly replied
He heard the phone click and in a split second he felt alone.
~ 2 DAYS LATER – 2nd APRIL 2001 ~
Serena sat in the darkness of morning, the curtains pulled tightly shut, she didn’t want to see the outside world anymore, she knew that no matter how much she wept the world would never stop for her tears, but she didn’t care, the world just seemed so pointless so – insignificant.
~ 7.30AM ~
Kevin’s alarm went off, but it didn’t wake him up – he hadn’t slept. He rolled out from under the sheets and sighed helplessly, the early morning sun shone through the slightly pressed open curtains, it was a nice day by all interpretations, but he’d never felt more shitty before. He’d promised to meet Howie in the Gym down the road at 8:30 but he really couldn’t be bothered. He contemplated ringing and canceling, but he knew Howie would put on his famous helpless act, and make Kevin just feel worse. He knew in his own mind he was neglecting his friends, but hell he was also neglecting himself. He ran his hand down his cheek, he hadn’t shaved in a while, once again he couldn’t be bothered.
~ 8.25AM ~
Kevin rolled his car to a complete stop and reached for his bag on the opposite seat, he suddenly recalled how Serena had sat in that seat, her short hair shining in the lights along the road, her lips parted into a perfect smile, her composure straight and perfect. Then she’d turn to him and smile again, this time with her eyes. He sighed, shaking himself from the day dream, and grabbed up his bag.
~ AT THE SAME TIME ~
“Have one” Nat instated flinging the chocolate egg in front of Serena
“Why are you here?” Serena asked groggily
“Gee’s aren’t we happy this morning” Nat responded standing with her hands on her hips staring down as Serena slumped over the kitchen table in her bathrobe.
“It’s 8:30. What are you doing here?”
“Trying to cheer you up”
Nat placed a new cup of coffee and a glass of orange juice along with a bottle of pills in front of Serena. Serena pushed back the pills and the orange drink and settled in on the coffee.
“Take your pills Rena” Nat pleaded
“I don’t want, why prolong the inevitable”
“Serena you have got to stop this, you just keep giving up on yourself, it’s pathetic”
“Fine, then I'm pathetic as well”
“Serena!” Nat threw her hands in the air
“If he means so much to you, why don’t you call him?” she hissed
“HE doesn’t mean ANYTHING to me Nat, get that through your head”
“Get this Serena, you can be a stubborn, snobby little wench, but for god sakes you’re my best friend, and I’ve known you since forever, so I know when I guys gotten to you, and this guy – got to you, cant you see that? Just stop thinking about death and start thinking about life”
Nat shrugged helplessly as a vacant look brimmed on Serena’s face.
“At least get out and do something. What about the gym? You used to like going there”
Serena wasn’t really in the mood, but she did need to get out of the house, little things about it would remind her of the time her and Kevin spent together.
“Whatever” she nonchalantly replied
~ 9:00AM ~
Kevin aimlessly starred into thin air, and lifted the hand weight without a thought.
“Woho anyone home in there?” Howie mocked waving his hand in front of Kevin
Kevin snapped from his daydream.
“What?” he questioned
“I said the worlds been attacked by space aliens”
“Oh”
Howie shrugged, then laughed. His friend was truly ‘out-of-it’.
~ AT THE SAME TIME ~
“Come on” Nat instructed pulling Serena through the sliding doors
It was a different Gym, then the one they usually went to. Nat had decided the further away from the house the better.
Serena walked into the main area of the gym, she briefly looked around, but didn’t care to notice anyone. She walked over to the bar and sat herself down there.
“You go ahead, I’ll join you in a second” she announced to Nat
Nat nodded and headed across the gym.
Kevin was sure he was seeing things, from the weights room he could swear the girl over by the bar was Serena, but it couldn’t be her, she was so far from her house. It couldn’t be her – could it?
He pulled himself up from the bench and strutted over, he had to make sure.
Serena felt ill, it hit her suddenly and with brutal force. The room began to spin, and get darker. A light flickered before her eyes – then darkness.
Kevin saw her hit the ground with amazing force, his eyes widened and he bolted to where she was, pushing past a few people he knelt down beside her – it was her.
“Serena?” he whispered
He placed one arm under her neck and the other under her lower back and lifted her into the air. She was almost lifeless – or so it seemed.
“Oh mi god, what happened?” Nat screamed running up to her friend
“She just collapsed” Howie announced, he too had seen it happen.