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Pain
Facing the fact that nothing moves and everything moves and nothing can hold you to what you don’t know you find that nothing can be taken and nothing can be given because time just keeps going on around you while you stand still, and then it catches up behind you and you fall through it and don’t know where you’re going so you just keep falling until time stops and you shatter. Pieces drift away and scatter to the winds that you are trying to become but can’t because you can’t figure out how to fly. All the people still think that this is all real, and you can’t break through their illusions to make it go away, so the pieces of you just fly away and you pretend that it’s all okay, but there is nothing that anyone can do or say to really take the pain away. When pain is all you know you wish that someone or something could take it all away, but there is no way to do that when the pain is part of who you are. If it went away who would you be? What would be left? All that’s left is an empty shell that’s filled with pain and you want to cut it out. Want to bleed and see if you can make it go away… bleed it out. Want to watch it run red from your veins and see if it will run dry. Pretty red drops of pain falling on the white stain of your lies hiding from all the world that you cry crimson tears. Red petals. Rose petals. Blood petals. Blood roses… dripping on the purity of innocence that no longer exists, and you gather up the roses and smile, because no one has ever given you flowers before, and now your pain will do it for you. Because when you come this far the pain is your friend, and the only one you have left. And you wonder why you would ever try to bleed it dry. You wonder… until the next time.
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