Tips for Keeping Your New Year's Resolutions:
*Make only one or two resolutions
*Choose resolutions that you've been thinking about for some time
*Choose to adopt a new good behavior rather than trying to shake an engrained bad habit
*Choose realistic goals, that you feel confident you can meet
*If you don't succeed, determine the barriers that blocked you and try again
I started this year off with the best of intentions. Instead of making a specific New Year's resolution, I simply resolved to do my best to make 2003 a better year. It couldn't possibly be as bad as the previous year... Or, could it?
In 2002, my resolution was to quit smoking, permanantly. I had quit several times before. Sometimes it would last a month, a few months, even a year. But, I would always fall back on smoking whenever "life threw a curve ball" at me.
2002 was no different. I would break down and have one whenever I needed stress relief. At first, it was just a crutch: I would get irritated by someone or something, and go smoke. I'd start again, I'd stop for a while, then I'd start again. I was using the nicotine patch, so this wasn't just needing the nicotine. Obviously, my psychological addiction was stronger than my physical addiction. I consoled myself with the fact that at least I had cut back.
Once tax season was over, I was determined to quit completely. I dealt with irritations and stress with relaxation techniques, like deep breathing, drinking teas, exercising.
Things were going well, Spring was here, and life was good. There were still irritations and other things going on that I had to deal with, but my resolve was strong. Just when I thought I thought I was well on the way to beating the habit,..WHAM!... John was unexpectedly laid off in mid May, and I was dealing with the stress of that, as well as a financial mess. Relaxation techniques didn't calm the stress anymore, and I started having an occasional smoke here and there. If this was a test of my willpower, I didn't do very well.
The final test of my willpower came on June 3, 2002 at 5:15 p.m. After my car accident, I couldn't cope with anything, so I started smoking all the time again. At first, I thought it would be just for a little while until I could get a grip on things. But days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. Even though I am on pain medication, and in therapy and on medication to treat my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, I still find myself very frustrated most of the time.
If I made quitting smoking my resolution for this year, I'm certain I would have given up my now. Since the beginning of the year, it has snowed every day, I've had to deal with my driving phobia in horrible driving conditions, I got sick on New Year's day, I've had to deal with insensitive and irritating people, and I've had to deal with life-altering news, (which I'll get into at a later date).
I am noticing, however, that I am coping with all of these things better than I would have in the past. In keeping with my resolution for this year, I have tried to maintain a postive attitude and keep an open mind instead of letting these things overwhelm me. No, I haven't quit smoking yet, but I am learning to cope with stress, so, when I am ready to quit, I won't give up without a fight.
Thanks for reading!
Take care!
Ann Marie
