PAIRING : Buffy/Angel

RATING : NC17

SPOILERS : To Shanshu in LA

DISCLAIMER : I do not own these characters. Nor do I own “Breathe” (Faith Hill).

                I open the door to the hotel after having dinner with my friends. It was nice. Dinner. Friends. Life. Breath. I never realized how much it would all mean. It’s been different for a few days, and already I love it. I grabbed my mail and focus on one envelope. I’m anxious to read it:

Angel – I wasn’t sure if I should write, but… tomorrow is the day you always wanted for me. A day when I finally have someone who can give me children, and make love to me, someone to take me into the light. I will marry tomorrow. I feel like I’ve spent my life waiting for you Angel, and I can’t wait any longer. I’m sorry… what I want from you, I can never have. But know I know all you’ve sacrificed for me. And know that every bone in my body is still in love with you. I will always love you. - Love Buffy

                I grab my coat and race out the door.

                Here I sit. In the bride’s room with something borrowed, something blue, something old and something new. Friends and family downstairs. Ten minutes more and Willow would come upstairs with Giles, ready to walk me down the isle. I will be something other than the slayer today. I will be Mrs. Riley Finn.

                Luckily, I found Cordelia’s invitation and find the church. She’s inside; I can feel her, probably upstairs in the bride’s room getting ready for her wedding.

                Suddenly, I can feel him. His presence washes over me and I turn quickly and gasp. He’s standing in the doorway.| “Angel!” I say, a little too excited for a girl about to married.

                “Buffy… I love you.”

                “What?” I gasp.

                “I love you. I never stopped. I didn’t want to leave. I never wanted to, but there was no other choice. I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry I couldn’t be what you need.”  And I can feel the magic floating in the air; being with him gets me that way. “I couldn’t be what you need, but I can now.” And he pulls the curtains away.

                I watch the sunlight dances across your face and I’ve never been this swept away. I can’t talk. I can’t think. Angel is standing in the sunlight. Tears start to fall and I have to touch him. I have to feel him warm. She whispered as she caught her breath. “Angel, what happened?” I touch his cheek and he leans into it.

                “I’m human. I atoned for my crimes. I’m human. I can still fight. I have to still fight. But I’m human. I *want* to be what you need Buffy.”

                “You are Angel. There’s nobody else who could be.”

                “But Rile-” And she grabs me and her lips are so soft on mine.

                “Nobody else.” I whisper to him and he nods. “Angel, get me away from here.” And before I know it, we’re in his car, top down flying away from the church as fast as we can. All my thoughts just seem to settle on the breeze.

                “Where should we go?” I just look at him and he knows. And as we open the door to the mansion, we find it’s filled with candles. The bed has new sheets and is half on the balcony. The window curtains are floating on the gently breeze around the bed. “I… Cordelia.” He finds a small note on the bed. “Be happy. Love the Gangs.” He reads.

                “Oh Angel…”

                “You look beautiful Buffy. The perfect bride.”

                “Make love to me, Angel. Make me feel alive again. When I’m lying wrapped up in your arms the whole world just fades away. The only thing I wanna hear is the beating of your heart.”

                “I’ve loved you since the moment I saw you, and before that I think. Every inch of me is built for you Buffy Anne Summers. Every part of me is so in love with you I can even breathe. I want you by my side forever.” He pulls out the Claddaugh ring. “My people, before I was changed, exchanged this as a symbol of devotion, but also as a symbol of union. The Irish wedding band. Be my wife. Let me take you in the sunlight, and give you children. Let me make love to you and watch your hair turn grey. I want it all with you.”

                “I knew I loved you before I ever laid eyes on you. I think a part of me was found when I met you. You were the first and only person to ever see me as something completely different than a slayer. You saw me as a girl, and now as a woman. Every part of me is in love with you. My mind, my heart, my soul, my body… and I would be honored to be your wife forever.”

                We’re both crying as I slip the ring on her finger and she’s mine once again.

//Cause I can feel you breathe

Is washing over me

And suddenly I’m melting into you

There’s nothing left to prove

Baby all we need I just to be

Caught up in the touch

A slow and steady rush

Baby isn’t that the way that love’s supposed to be?

I can feel you breathe

Just breathe//

                We’re both trembling as his arms wrap around my waist and our lips meet again. I can feel his hands on the small of my back guiding my body close to his and it’s amazing. I put my hand over his heart, knowing it’s beating. “God I’ve missed you so much Angel.”

                “I know…” I whisper as I pull her close. Her arms wrap around me and we sway to music only we can hear. It’s amazing to be this close. To know  I will be making love to her again tonight. To be inside her again, to feel her under me, to touch her skin… the thoughts are all too much.

//In a way I know my heart is waking up

As all the walls come tumbling down

Closer than I ever felt before and I know

And you know

There’s no need for words right now//

                I raise my head and look up at him. We kiss gently at first, but I feel his tongue in my mouth as he tilts my head and kisses me deeper. God has it been seven years since I’ve had this feeling? The anticipation of sharing something so incredible with the man I love. I pull away and turn around and I feel his fingers unzipping my dress.

                As the zipper slides down her back, I realize she didn’t wear a bra with this dress. I slide the dress down her bare shoulders and kiss the skin as it’s revealed. Her hands reach behind her and run through my hair, pulling my lips to her neck and shoulders. I glide my mouth over her skin, kissing tenderly as the dress falls to the floor. As I’m kissing her shoulder blades, I run my hands up her body, starting at her thighs. I slide them around her waist and take her breasts in my hands. She gasps my name. This is heaven. In her I find my redemption.

                I can’t even think, he’s touching me. And suddenly, there are too many boundaries. Too many walls. Too much clothing. I turn around and he kisses me immediately. I slide my hands up his chest and push his duster off. He helps me lift his sweater off and I run my hand over his chest. I can’t even believe this is happening.

                She’s touching me, running her hands over my muscles, down my arms, over my shoulders, around my neck. She pulls me close to her and I pick her up and crush her to my body. Skin on skin. We make our way over to the bed and I set her down. She sits and looks to me, her eyes begging me to join her. In time Love, in time. I lift one of her legs and slide my hand up, as I sink to my knees in front of her. She lays back as I spread her thighs a little more.

                He kisses me gently before I feel his tongue on my sex. I feel his finger probing me, entering me gently, and caressing me from the inside. Oh God… I’m wet, I know that. I’ve been waiting for this moment too long. I just never thought it would happen. His tongue slips inside my body as well and I arch off the bed.

                She tastes so good. Has it really been four years? But it has been seven years since I took her virginity. So much has happened, but it all melts away in her body. She squeezes me as she comes. She moans my name as I drink her down. I stand up and she’s panting, begging for air. She sits up and pulls me close to her. She kisses my navel and her hands are at my belt. She slowly pulls it from my pants. Then she unzips them and pushes them down, delighted I’m wearing no boxers.

                It’s been so long since I’ve seen him. I never *really* saw him before. I was too shy. I was a child. I’m a woman now, admiring the man I love in all his beauty as he kicks off his pants and shoes. I put my hand up and he crawls up the bed as I slide back and he’s laying on top of me. I can hear his heart pounding, feel his heated breath on my neck as he simply lays on top of me. That familiar weight, body covering mine. It’s all too much and I’m crying.

                I can feel her breath on my neck and look down to find her crying. “Are you alright?” She nods. She’s happy. I know how she feels. She reaches down, takes my manhood and guides it into her body. We’re finally complete, how we’re supposed to be.

//Cause I can feel you breathe

Is washing over me

And suddenly I’m melting into you//

                He’s buried deep inside me, at last! I’m complete. I am me. I don’t have to be anything else except me. He moves inside me and his lips are on mine, and all over my body. My entire body is on fire as he sets a slow and steady pace. I ran my hands up his back, over the tattoo I know is there. I can feel the muscles on his back that keep him above me. God is there anything better than knowing I’m making love to the only person I truly love?

//There’s nothing left to prove

Baby all we need I just to be

Caught up in the touch

A slow and steady rush

Baby isn’t that the way that love’s supposed to be?//

                I’m inside her. I can feel her around me, gripping me, pulling me in. She invites me into her moist center. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this complete. This is my purpose: to pleasure her the rest of my life, to make her feel like a goddess every second I’m with her, and every second I’m not. I’m gasping for air and I can feel her breathe, her chest heaves, as she exhales on my skin. Everything I’m doing, touching her, moving inside her, kissing her, it’s all natural. I’m not thinking about what I’m doing, my body just knows her. It reacts to her body without a second thought. All I have to do is breathe. Just breathe.

//Caught up in the touch

A slow and steady rush

Baby isn’t that the way that loves supposed to be?//

                God he feels amazing inside me. I whimper, “Angel… I love you…” as I meet his hips. We’re more rushed now, trying to achieve pure bliss, ecstasy. I can feel him breathe. And I have to remember to breathe as I feel him fill me with his life. I scream his name as I come, the most powerful orgasm I’ve ever had. He makes me feel things I cannot explain. I can’t even understand them. I just have to breathe.

                She contracts around me, squeezes me, milks me, draws me deep inside her. And we collapse in a sweaty heap on the bed, sated. Finally together. I pull her into my arms and I run my finger over her ring.

                “Is this real?” She asks.

                “This is forever.” He answers.

                “I can feel the magic floating in the air; being with you gets me that way.”

                “Just breathe Buffy. Just breathe.”

                “I am. For the first time I am.”

                “Me too.”

~El Fin~