~oRgAnIzEd InSaNiTy~ Crazy Evil Dru Fiction!

RATING : NC17 (violence, rape, physical & mental torture & abuse, character death - not for the faint at heart, or those who don’t like nasty, mean Angelus)

DISCLAIMER : I do not own these characters. Nor do I own “Eraser” by Nine Inch Nails.

It’s wrong. Fucking wrong but what can I do about it? Like a moth to a flame. It’s why I’m here. Watching her body sway to the music. Watching her rub against the little boy like he’s some sort of god. We all know who she really craves. That’s why I came. She called to me last night, in her sleep. She whispered my name as I drew her picture. Fucking bitch called *my* name and doesn’t even remember it.

“No way! I thought that she was dating Mike.” Her voice breaks the silence in my head.

“Oh, but Mike’s dead, Lover. I thought you’d have heard.” I say, jumping out from the bushes.

“I thought we’d covered that! How many friends of yours have to die for you to get that? Maybe we’ll start right here.” I grab Willow by the neck and Buffy whips a stake out. That’s right, Lover. Get ready to dance. One of these days, it *will* be your last. I’ll see to that.

“Let her go. You wanna fight, you come to me. Don’t bring them into this. It isn’t about them.”

“You’re wrong, Lover. It’s completely about them.” She starts circling around me and I turn with her, keeping my tight grip on the little girl’s neck. “They told you I was no good. They told you to stay away. And now they tell you the same. Why don’t you be honest, Buff? Tell them who you dream about.”

“Buffy! No!” Willow cries as Buffy drops her stake and comes within range of my grasp. I shove Willow away and grab Buffy’s neck.

“Go.” She says. “I’ll be fine. Just go. Get some place safe.” She pleads with them, but they don’t move.

They hesitantly start retreating but when a minion of mine shows up they stop. “Kill them.” I order and they start running.

“Tsk tsk, Lover. Such nasty words from a heroine? What ever would Giles say?”

I lightly suck on her neck, just above her pulse, which quickens. “Oh, you know what I want, Lover.” I slid my hands around her waist and pull her back against my body. I press my cock against her and I smell the fear permeate the air around us.

“Let. Me. Go.” She says, trying to struggle as one of my hands grabs her cunt.

“Now why would I do that when I’ve got you exactly where I want you? Huh? Why not let me have at you? You already gave your precious virginity to me.”

I’ve been standing here for an hour. Waiting for him. I finally see him, standing in the shadows behind the stairs. My body is on fire. I want him but I shouldn’t. God, I shouldn’t. It’s wrong and every part of me knows this. But I want him nonetheless.

I see him eyeing a girl, daring me to object. And I have to. It’s my job. I walk over to him and whisper in his ear, “You want someone, take me.”

His arm wraps around my waist and he forcefully pulls me close to his body. “Done.”

Within seconds we’re outside, in the alley. I pull out a stake and we start to circle each other. We throw a couple punches, I kick him in the gut once. He gets my stomach a couple times. And somehow, I end up pinned back against the chain fence. “Now what, Slayer? This what you wanted?” His face vamps and he holds my hands tighter above my head, against the chains. I feel his fangs graze my neck and I whimper. I don’t want this to be over. I don’t want this to be it.

“Or maybe you want this…” he whispers as his mouth claims mine in a carnal kiss. I feel his fangs break the skin on my lower lip and I can do nothing but feel his body against mine, his tongue invading my mouth. For as much as I want it, I don’t. It’s wrong and I try not to whimper. I try not to feel myself getting wet at the thought of his hardness pressing against my thigh.

He grabs the stake from my hand and he’s so strong. I don’t remember him being this strong. One of his hands holds mine above my head and I feel the other rip my skirt off. “Please… no.” I whisper. “Don’t.” I say, but he rips my panties off too and I feel his finger invade me.

“But you’re so wet, Buff. Clearly, you want this. Just close your eyes.” He whispers as he kisses my eyes. I can feel the threat of fang underlying his every caress. I’m in no position to stop him. I close my eyes and before I know it, I feel something invade my body. Sharp and painful. I tear and bleed and scream.

“What’s wrong, Lover?” He asks as he grazes my neck with his fangs. “I thought since you’re so interested in staking me, I’d *stake* you.” He growls and I realize what’s inside me. He forces it inside me and I’m bucking and moaning into his touch, while scream and begging for mercy he won’t give.

I can feel the sharp point hitting my cervix, cutting me. Hurting me. “Please… no…” I beg him.

“I could go find little Willow again… or… I could find the little boy and introduce him to the pleasures of my cock…” He says.

“Then scream for me, Buff. Tell me how much you want it.” But I just start to cry and he laughs and smirks at me. Damn him. I hate needing him this much. I hate that I let him do this to me. I hate myself. “And you better enjoy it, Buff.”

“Huh?” I say and realize that I’m not in the alley. I’m not pinned against a chain fence. Did the alley ever exist? Or was it part of my delusion? The stake. His lips. His cruel words. I’m going crazy.

“You’re crazy.” I whimper. Why I fight, I don’t know. I can’t win with him. He knows me. He knows my strengths and weaknesses. He knows my body, and my body knows his.

“Oh, I don’t think so.” I feel his lips at the base of my neck. “I think you know I’m right.”

“Good question.” He starts licking my skin and I feel his hand slide upward towards my breasts, as his other hands continues to rub my sex. I whimper and rock into his hand. He chuckles. “Looks like it’s *you* who is wanting, Slayer.”

“Angelus…” I whimper. I almost wish he would take the stake and- I shouldn’t want this. I don’t. But my body won’t listen to my mind. And my heart keeps seeing Angel.

“That’s right, Little Girl.” He says as he pushes me to the ground. He walks over and kicks me in the face. “And be sure to remember.” With that, he walks away and I’m left wanting.

Always wanting. Wanting him. Against my will. I don’t want to want him. I don’t want his pain. I don’t want his cruelty. But those eyes are all I have left of the man I once loved. There must be a part of Angel in those eyes. Some little caring part that could love me. Isn’t there?

I have not had a night’s rest since that night in the park. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I can’t even dream. And I can’t get rid of this constant throbbing between my legs. I’ve tried. I’ve tried in the shower. And in my bed. I tried in the bathroom at school. But I can’t make it stop and it hurts me. It kills me.

In my heart, I know he’s the only one that can make it go away. He’s the only one who can satisfy me. That’s why I’m here. That’s why I came. That’s why I’m creeping by a minion on my way upstairs. I open the door slowly and creep inside.

“What?” He growls. “YOU come to MY *home* and say that to *me*?” He grabs my hair and throws me across the room. “HOW DARE YOU! YOU BITCH!”

I start crying. I can’t help it. I came looking for this. I *need* this. I sought him out and I found him.

“STOP CRYING!” He screams. “You. Came. Here. Buff. Did you expect to find Angel?”

“No.” I say. “No. I just… I… I don’t know…” I say. “I don’t know. I’m sorry.” And I stand up slowly and start to walk to the door.

But he stops me. “Going so soon, Lover? The party’s just getting started.”

He grabs my hips and pulls them back towards his. “Please don’t.” I say. “Just let me go.”

“You came to me, Slayer. Why?” I feel his lips against my skin and I cry harder.

Things couldn’t have worked out better. I’ve got the slayer panting and crying in my arms. She doesn’t even know why she’s begging. She doesn’t understand the power I have over her. Hell, *I* don’t understand it. I just know it’s true. Power. Making the greatest slayer in history come to *me*. Panting for *me*.

I pull her away from the door and toss her onto my bed. I take my shirt off and I can smell her fear and arousal in the room. “You come here, tell me you need me, and then want to leave? You’re sending mixed messages.”

“I’m not the one in *your* bedroom, Buff.” I climb onto the bed and over her. She lays back and I rest on top of her, my hips between her thighs. I can feel the heat of her sex through my pants.

I graze my fangs along her neck. Her pulse quickens and she cries as I penetrate her skin. I drink the crimson gift that flows from her neck and she grabs my head. She holds it close to her skin, pulls me towards her, arches her back up and presses her body into mine. She whimpers and begs me to stop.

She’s sweet. Fear. Arousal. Innocence. Confusion. Delicious. I have to have her. I was going to kill her. But I want her to beg me. I want her to want to die. I want to break her. The greatest slayer in history, begging me to kill her. So I’ll taste her now. I’ll fuck her next. And I’ll break her. I’ll watch her crumble.

I feel her desire soaking through her flimsy skirt, onto my bed. “That’s right, Buff, get nice and wet for me.” I whisper in her ear as I lick the wound clean. I’m rock hard. Slayer’s blood is the sweetest. I can feel the power coursing through me to my cock. *Her* blood is making me *hard*. Her blood will be what fucks her. And she knows it.

I slide my hand down her body roughly, squeezing her breast roughly, before ripping her skirt off. She cries louder, “Please don’t.” She says.

“Hmm, don’t think so. After all, you did come here. And I’ve never been one to deny you what you wanted.” I rip her panties in two and toss them aside. She tries to kick me off. Bitch. But I sit up on my knees and jam one between her legs, and the other on the other side of her thigh, effectively pinning her lower body. I rub my knee against her bare sex and she rocks into it. She wants this too. She just can’t admit it. Bitch won’t need to.

I look down at her and shred her blouse. I yank on her bra next and toss it aside. “Such a pretty little whore.” I say, looking down at her. “What would the Council say to this, though? Huh? Slayer with her legs spread for Angelus?”

“No he wouldn’t, Lover. No one will want you now.” I push my knee harder against her sex, forcing her to spread a little more. “That’s it, Baby. I’m *going* to fuck you. It’s up to you if you like it.”

I unzip my jeans and slither out of them. I *am* glad for vampire strength and speed because she tries to kick me again, but it’s no use for her. “I do have to say, Buff, I’ve never been on this side of the slayer.”

She reaches up and tries to smack me but I catch her arm mid-smack and pin them against the headboard. Perfect. “You *will not* ever raise a hand to me again, Bitch!” I growl and bite her lip forcefully, drawing blood. She sobs and tries to buck me off her, but it doesn’t work. “Oh, Buff, you’re just making me want you more.”

I hold her hands with one of mine and grab the manacles from my nightstand. “NO!” She cries but it won’t do any good. And I want her to scream.

I grab her knees and pull them apart roughly before slamming inside her. “NOOO!” She screams.

“That’s not what I wanna hear.” I growl and bite her neck again while hammering into her. If only the Master could see me now. Hell, I *am* the fucking Master!

I growl as I come inside her and she’s sobbing uncontrollably. I stand up and touch her breast gently. “Don’t touch me.” She cries.

“Oh Buff, this was all your fault. You play with fire and you’re gonna get burned.” I can still smell her arousal. Some little part of her wants this just as badly as she wanted Angel. The dark part of her.

-Use You-

“SPIKE!” I scream. “DRUSILLA!” I find them in the garden. She’s singing to the stars and he’s watching her. “Get all the minions together.”

“Why, Angel, you’re humming, all around you.”

“That’s right, Dru.”

“Why should we help you?” Spike asks.

I grab his duster and pull him up towards me. “Because, My Boy, I’m your *fucking* Master.”

All thirty of our minions are waiting downstairs. I pull my leather pants on and look at her. She’s sleeping. She actually passed out after I fucked her a third time. She refuses to admit that she wants to come. All in good time, I’m sure.

“Buff, wake up.” I say as I chain her ankles together. She slowly wakes up and tries to pull herself free.

“What?” She says coldly.

“I just wanna take you for a walk.”

“I’m not a dog.” She says.

“No, you’re a whore. And I need a whore right now. Let’s go.”

I get her to stand up and I chain her hands behind her back. Then I push her into the hallway and down the stairs. She trips on the way down and falls down four stairs. She lands in a naked heap, covered in my come, at the bottom of the stairs.

“Get up, Bitch!” I growl. She starts to but I kick her down. “Better yet, crawl.” I kick her little ass to the center of the room. I’ve got everyone’s attention now. “I’m glad you could make it.” Buff starts to stand up but I kick her again. “Stay there like the whore you are. Slut.” I turn to address the crowd. “This is the slayer!” I announce. “She who has killed our kind in this town for two years! She who killed the master. Let he who kills the slayer wear his crown. That is what was decided.” I grab her hair and make her look around the room. “This is the girl you fear! But we shall fear no more!”

One of the minions shouts out, “Long live Master Angelus!” And a few more join in. “Long live Master Angelus! Long live Master Angelus! The Master of us all!”

I stand proudly next to her and get an idea. I drop my pants and make her look at me. “Open your mouth, Bitch and suck me.”

“No.” She spits at me.

I backhand her pretty hard. “You will open your mouth, or you’ll feel every fledge in this room fill your cunt. Now open your mouth.”

And she does.

-Scar You-

“And no teeth.” I growl as I slam into her little mouth. She’s never done this before, but I don’t care. I fuck her little face, harder and harder until I howl and come. She refuses to swallow and it covers her neck and breasts. “Lovely my sweet little slut.” I say to her before turning to face my audience. “She poses no threat. She kneels before me as a submissive little whore. Don’t you, Lover?” I ask her and pull her hair harder.

She whimpers and spits in my face. I kick her cunt hard and send her sliding across the room. “YOU WILL CALL ME MASTER!” I scream at I grab her drag her back to the center of the room.

“I won’t.” She says angrily. “I’ll never call you master.”

I kneel beside her and push her on to her back. I motion to a couple nearby minions to hold her arms as I slide my hands gently over her bruised body. She whimpers. Oh yes, my Love, you*will* call me Master, and I’ll call you Slave.

I lean down and kiss her tenderly. “Oh Buffy,” I whisper. “You’re so beautiful.” I kiss her ear lobe softly and it’s killing me, but it’ll break her.

“Angel…” she whimpers as I gently caress her sex. She opens her legs further and I tease her labia with my fingers before slowly pushing them inside. “Angel… please…” I kiss her deeply before licking my way down her neck, over her collarbone to the valley between her breasts. I encircle each hardened nipple before sucking gently. My fingers increase their pace and she’s panting and moaning and writhing underneath my mouth and fingers. “Oh gods, Angel, I’m so close…” I look at her eyes and I think she’s forgotten where she is. Time she remembers.

-Break You-

Just as she’s about to come, I pull away and scream, “LOOK AT ME, BITCH!”

Her eyes fly open and I actually see the moment that she snaps. I watch her eyes as immediately realization fills them, and all hope just vanishes. Nothing is left. Just a vacant stare of an unsated girl. She arches up for contact, but my fingers aren’t there. I stand up and look down at her. Her eyes silently beg me for release. And she knows what she has to say. “Please,” she whispers.

“Please, what?”

“Let me come.”

“What?” I ask again, more harshly.

“Please, let me come.” I just stand there, looking down at her. “Master.” She whispers. The entire room erupts in clapping and growls at my victory.

I kick her dripping cunt and growl, “NO!” I motion for the minions to let her go and they do. I leave over and pull her up by the hair. “Look around, Whore! Look at each one of my family and remember them. They heard you call me Master, they saw you beg me to come. If you see one of them, you dart you eyes and hang your head in shame like the slut you are. You understand, Slave?”

“Yes, Master.” She whimpers.

I unchain her and drag her to the door. I throw her outside and she lands in a naked heap in the mud. “Go, Slave. I’m through with you.”

-Lose Me-

I slide the window open and fall inside. I can’t move. It hurt too much to even come home, but I did. On the floor, under my bed, I see Mr. Gordo. Oh, Mr. Gordo, what happened to the girl who you knew? What happened to the child? The child created a monster.

My Angel is gone. He’s never coming back. I saw him tonight, but it was just a dream. A delusion. An escape. But I can’t escape anymore. I’m beyond escape. Beyond the point of ever being okay again. I’m just… lost.

I turn away from the black eyes that stare at me. Don’t look at me Mr. Gordo. Don’t see who I’ve become. Don’t look at the mud-covered, come-covered whore that lays in front of you, at your feet. Don’t reflect me in your glassy eyes, for it is not worth seeing. I am no one. I am nothing. I am a whore. Just like he said. I went to him tonight. I dreamt of him. I wanted him. I did this. I am a slut.

-Hate Me-

What would Giles say? If he saw me, laying here on my floor in a bloody, bruised mess. How could I ever make him see? How could I ever apologize for being weak? I hate myself. I hate what I did. I hate that I still want him. I hate that my body still yearns for his touch, for release from him.

I hate that I still see Angel in his cruel eyes. I hate that I’ll close my eyes in a minute and dream of him again. And I hate that I’ll wake up.

-Smash Me-

I open my eyes to see the sun setting. I slept the entire day. I’m glad my mother is out of town. She doesn’t need to see my like this. I slowly stand up and make my way to the bathroom. I can’t even touch myself enough to wash. It hurts too much. I just let the warm water wash the mud and blood away. I take some of my fragrant liquid soap and just dribble it over my body, hoping to wash the smell of him away.

I slowly put on some sweatpants, and sneakers. A t-shirt and jacket. Giles will be w-

<DING DONG> “Buffy?” It’s Willow. She opens the door. “Oh my god, what happened?” She tries to pull me into her arms, but I push her away.

“Don’t touch me.” I say.

“Buffy, are you okay?” She asks. “What happened to you?”

“The Master.” I say. I don’t even know where it came from, it’s just what I’m supposed to say. Like my brain was programmed to call him that when I wasn’t looking. Like he claims me and owns me. He has power over me. I *am* what he says. I *am* his whore.

“The Master is dead, Buffy.” She says.

“Long live his grandchilde.” I repeat.

“What?”

“Just leave.” I beg her. “Let me be.”

“No, Buffy. We should go see Giles.”

I couldn’t argue with her. I just let her lead me downstairs and out the door without thinking about it. We are halfway to Giles and she hasn’t said anything. She’s just watching me and I’m just staring off into space.

“Look who it is.” I hear a voice say.

I look up and immediately look down. Willow stops, as if waiting for me to kick his ass. But I just keep walking, far around him. “Buffy?” Willow asks, catching up. “Shouldn’t we…”

“Let’s go.” I whisper.

“Going so soon?” He asks. He knows who I am. He knows I’m a whore. He knows that I’m a slave to Master Angelus. He saw me, laying, begging. I look over at Willow. I’m still the slayer to her. I can see it in her eyes. I don’t want her to know what I am. I don’t-

“Buffy…” She says

“That’s not her name.” He says.

I turn and look up at him for a second before looking away. “Please don’t.” I whisper. “I beg of you.”

“Such a little begging slut these days, aren’t you? I wonder if I could make you beg like Master Angelus did. Maybe we’ll all have a go at you next time.”

I turn to Willow and it hurts too much for her to know the truth.

-Erase Me-

“Buffy?” She says.

“No, her name is Slave.” He says before he starts to walk away, “Oh, by the way, Master Angelus says anytime you want, you’re welcome back.”

His words don’t even hurt me anymore. The look in Willow’s eyes do. She doesn’t understand. She can’t understand. I just want… I want to just stop.

I feel too cold. I hurt too much. I scar too deep.

It’s not worth it anymore. If I’m not here, then I can’t let them down. I can’t see their faces when I tell them I’m a whore. I can’t see their looks of pity and disappointment. I can’t watch them die. If I’m not here, then they’ll never know the truth.

I couldn’t bare them to know the truth. Maybe it’d be better if I was just erased.

-Kill Me-

I look and Willow and whisper, “Goodbye.” Then I take off, as fast as I can. I don’t care if it hurts. Pain doesn’t bother me anymore. It’s a welcome relief from the cold.

I run through the cemetery and I hear her calling after me. “BUFFY! WAIT! PLEASE DON’T GO!” But I have to. She doesn’t know. She wouldn’t understand.

I run and run an-

“Well, well, Slave!” He says. “I was just looking for you.”

I can hear Willow’s cries getting closer. NO! She can’t know. I look up at him and whisper, “Kill me.”

“What?”

“Kill me… KILL ME… KILL ME… KILL ME… KILL ME… ERASE ME!”

“Okay.” He shrugs and he grabs me and turns me in his arms and I see Willow make the clearing befo-

-Eraser-

<Snap> She falls limp to the ground. I *am* the eraser.

~El Fin~