:::sits alone in her home, Bailey having wandered off on his own despite her pleadings with him, and begins to write:::

'ow could I 'ave been so naieve? I am a fool, aye, by all rights, I am. Though, I shall nae let this...:::searches for a proper term:::...male continue tae be near me. 'e 'as ruined all trust I 'ad, all 'opes I 'ad. 'ow could 'e NAE tell me tha 'e was still married tae Alianna? I would think tha e'en one whom didna wish tae return tae their wife would tell 'is interest tha 'e was still wed! Aye, I am sure tha now I am e'en in the disfavour o'the Lord Carazzi...and I canna say tha I trully blame 'im. But...damn Calkane...'e should 'ave told me! 'ow was I tae knae tha 'e was still married tae Alianna? I should 'ave asked, though, now, I dount tha I would 'ave gotten an 'onest answer from 'im.

Poor Lady Carazzi...I felt miniscule in 'er prescence. I 'ad nae idea. Damn me for the trusting fool tha I was. I shall nae be so any longer. Oh..aye, I intend tae 'ave m'say with Benjamin. Tis nae right o'im tae believe tha 'e can cavort and frollick with so many women, and 'ave nary a one o'them knae about it. Aye, I am angry...and per'aps rightfully so, though, nae as rightfully as 'is wife.

The walls shall be rebuilt,
And e'en 'e canna scale them in all 'is guilt.
For a turned cheek is meant only tae be slapped,
Again, I shall 'ave tae try and adapt.

The warmth; in 'is regard; can only be replaced with the bit'er
For the male whom calls 'imself a man, and needs tae 'ave a sit'er.~

The adoration grown, only tae be tarnished,
Anger growin tha needs tae be 'arnessed.
Emotions tha 'ad lain with a person, now resolved.
Through 'urt tears, and 'eavy 'eart dissolved.

The tat'ers o'trust now lay shorn,
As the true intentions o'this male 'ave been born.
I shall nae turn a blind eye tae 'is actions,
Now, 'e must suffer 'is own infractions.

Tikaris Kyra Flynn

:::picking up the glass of scotch she had at hand's reach, despite the admonishings of Kiralyn in her mind, she hurls it across the room to shatter into a million pieces, as she allowed her heart to be shattered:::::

--Journal Entry, 7 November, Tika Flynn

:::sits on the new chaise lounger she purchased for the sitting room at the Manor, journal lain open across her lap as she dips her quill to write, to the sounds of Ali's tears, and the peaceful, easy breathing of Lia:::

Damn Ben! How could he have done this to Ali? How? Yes, he was one I considered a brother. But, this is NOT the man I knew as my brother. NO where NEAR half the man. How could he be so uncaring of Ali? How could he have cried on my shoulder all those nights at the dome for her, and then have done this?

:::the writing on the parchment becomes deeper, marked by her anger over this recent set of events::::

Wait until I catch him about! And to drag all those other women in on it. Those poor, unsuspecting, fools. *I* never even suspected him of being capable of THIS! True, he has done things before I didnt agree with, even things I would have never done myself in times past. But THIS...this is by FAR the worst thing I have ever witnessed one who was supposed to love another do.

::her thoughts interrupted by the sounding of the door chimes, and Ali's footsteps in the hall, she places the journal on the chaise, and rises, stepping out to check on Ali. After ascertaining that Ali is indeed, all right, though very hurt, and angry, she returns to her writing, even more enflamed by Ben's actions::: I will DRAG him to the terrordome and give him a beating he will always remember for this. I have NEVER been so angry with Ben up until this point, to raise a hand to him...oh...but now, my blood boils!

:::Interrupted once again by the sound of pattering little feet, and a sweet, sleepy face, she looks to Lia.."Aun'y Leeerr...yous coming to sweep? Yous saided we goes to Ju'per..."...smiling softly, she nods to Lia.."Yes, lovey, and we will. Go and keep the bed warm for just a few minutes until I can change, ok?" Lia nods, and returns to snuggle beneath the brocade comforter of the queen sized bed, while she finishes her journal:::

Well, the precious one awaits...and I believe I would rather enjoy her company than yours, journal, so its off with you, and on to crawl into bed beside my Lovey.

:::leaves the journal open to dry, as she hurridly changes, and crawls into bed beside Lia, snuggling her tight, with promises to keep the snakes away, and butterfly kisses upon her cheek and forehead to lull her into sleep, while she watches her sleep and thinks silently, until sleep washes over her too:::::

--Journal Entry, 8 November, Lyrias Dreams

"gets the letter sent off to Ali, she sighs and rubs her throbbing temples..she looks out the window into the darkness, another night with no sleep, just walking the floor and thinking..she pulls the journal over and tries to think what to write"

At dome last night, Casi and I had a slight argument. Maybe i shouldnt have told Tika about Ben and Thia. But she had a right to know what was going on. Then its her decision if she wants to still see him. Casi tried saying it was just rumor.Bah! I know what i saw and heard. And just a couple nights ago, Ben was with Tori. I wondered then If he was still seeing Tika but said nothing. Then last night he and Thia are talking about how they might be good for each other. And Ben referring to Ali as his -ex wife- all the time. They are still married as far as I understand. And always making it a point to go up to all the newly arrived women and introducing himself.

Ali asked me once, before she and Ben was married, If i thought he was just using her to get close to Alterio. I told her then I thought he was. I didnt remind her of that though. I dont think she needs reminded of that. I know she is hurting as much as I am right now.

As far as Alterio. I havent heard from him since I sent that 'note' the other night, he did answer it but left things kind of unanswered. I want to mend what ever problems we had. I dont like being alone, and i dont like being without him. My life just doesnt have any meaning right now. I tried to move on, I have tried working more, I have even tried to stay drunk....so as to not think about him. Nothing worked. Now its up to him on what we do. Im trying to be patient and let him decide. But gods its killing me, not knowing. I dont know how he feels, but I cant just forget all these years we have been together. I love him to much, always have. I just dont know what more to offer.

Please Alterio, choose soon what you want. This is killing me.

"she sighs and shoves the journal aside as she gets up to dress and face another meaningless day"

--Journal Entry, 8 November, Vixen Blade

*she sits down at the desk, in frustration, eyeing her bitten ankle and muttering to herself.. she then takes up the quill to write, in tense, concise handwriting vastly unlike her usual sprawling script*

We should never have come here, Cal and I. I thought it was a place for opportunities: especially business opportunities, since the level of wealth on this island far surpasses some of the largest cities on the mainland. A few business options have presented themselves, but the social mores of this place disturb me more deeply every day.

An island of harlots, is what we've stumbled upon here. Perhaps not all, of course; Ara and Sylver, Char, Jane, Alianna. All decent people, content to fidelity to one person or solitude. The rest of them, though, gods above, could stock a mainland brothel and keep the customers satisfied for years. Calkane, married to another and leading my own sister-in-law on a string, merrily down the path to perdition. The poor girl's been hurt enough, and he knew that.. then carrying on with Xanthia...

Bah.

*she throws down the quill*

--Journal Entry, 8 November, Casidhe

:::sits still alone, Bailey having returned, and asleep now, as she sees that her letter has been answered, and begins to pour out her emotions onto parchment::::

Aye, per'aps Lord Carazzi tis right. Per'aps I am a disaapointment tae m'dead 'usband. Aye, I feel as though I am a disappointment tae m'self for allowing this tae go on.

::her eyes well with tears as that line embeds itself in her mind "you are a great disappointment to your late husband's memory.. "..hearing Alterio's voice as it runs constantly through her mind, though, having never actually heard him say such a thing, she can still hear it:::: Wha a fool I 'ave been. E'en I donna knae wha I was thinking.

Aye, I do. I was thinking about 'ow lonely it 'ad been, being placed upon a pedestal, and losing the one whom placed me t'ere. About 'ow lonely I 'ave been since 'is death. About 'ow nice it would be tae 'ave someone tae e'en talk tae, spend time with...

I was thinking about 'ow cold it 'ad been without 'im t'ere tae be with me.

True, I loved 'im with e'erything tha I am. I still do...but, 'ow can I 'old on tae a memory? 'ow can I expect a memory tae keep me warm, tae say tha 'e loved me? It 'as been soo lonely....so lonely. 'ow I wish tha 'e was still alive..

::doggedly, she swipes at the tears falling down her cheeks as she begins to write one more line::

M'love, I shall make it up tae ye, some'ow.

Tika

:::leaving the journal opened upon the table, she rises, picking up her shawl, and pulls it over her head to cover her face as she walks down to the shore, standing for a long, long while, as she does little more than cry, and stare out across the water, still unable to remove that one, single, tearing line from her memory:::

--Journal Entry, 8 November, Tika Flynn

Some say the ship o'wishes has strung itself on the fine thread that is the seam between sea and sky...there is music and energy that is washed up on the beach, the tides smell like mountains, the sky smells like earth...

I'm sitting up tonight, watching m'heart sleep, i guess tis a profession lovers fall into..He is a beautiful sleeper, dreams all translucent and shimmering on his brow.

There are certain things tha' come wi'oat asking- as they are meant.

The entire ordeal wi'the Ship ha'set me tae thinkin' whot I might wish for- had i a chance a'it...

I can safely say tha', I am, a'this moment, this minute, entirely, completely, truly, and genuinely happy.

*She smiles somewhat leaning to smooth at Sylver's hair as she stirs, warm, at her side* This...this elf, stretched aside me, skinny as e'er, and lit from wi'in a light such as never been named...

Loves me:
awkward, tall, wild hair, a multitude o'freckles, wi'much tae much tae say.

I oft times find m'self wonderin' why, bu'then I think on all the reasons why I love him, and I am again content. i know w'share thoughts, dreams, ambitions...

I should gladly hand o'er m'life tae him if need be, nae questions asked, nae a second thought nor backwards glance..

Sylver is the kind o'Lover one dreams aboat as a child.. Knight in Shining Armor in e'ery way - save..the knight part...an' the armor...

*she grins gently*

he is kind, faithful, true, honest, understanding, strong, and nae afraid tae be scared nor cry wi'me...

And I know tha' he, as I would, wou'stand by m'always for the sole principle tha' I am me, and I believe wha' I believe.

Nay a handful o'people in a million ha'been blessed wi'what I ha'been blessed wi'...

So I should like tae offer up thanks for bringin' him tae me..

and p'raps my wish, if I am granted one,

w'be tae let whomever has bestowed such a gift upon me know m'thanks. I feel only tha' were I tae write my thanks on a thousand sheets o'parchment for a thousand moons, still- still would i have made nae a mention of th'feelings tha'swell in this lasses heart.

*Stooping she kisses Sylver's forehead whispering gently against his ear*

I love you a rún, m'love, m'love.
One,
always.

*Smiling she blows out the candles that light the small room, and curls up at his side, to dreams, to find him...

--Journal Entry, 8 November, Arachne