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| Dream A Little Dream ... |
04/02/02 - Decisions ... Sometimes they make themselves. There’s not much on TV in the middle of the night, except at 2 a.m. when two favorites come on at the same time: Martha Stewart and Northern Exposure. Decisions, decisions! Well, last night I found out they’ve taken the 2 a.m. Martha off. Voila, no more decision. Sometimes decisions are forced on you. IF another man comes along, you need to go with him. That statement was made to me not long ago. I think it entails making a decision. I’m not really sure what it means. As it so happens, another man did come along. No lie! But, he’s a transient, just passing through. I’m unable to go with him. No decision necessary there. So, I’ve managed to get through a week of thinking, and am into the next. And I’m still unable to come to a decision. It’s really not a decision at all. It’s a possibility, big difference. Sometimes I have to wonder why the fun has to stop. I heard just this last weekend that too much of a good thing is bad for you. I don’t believe that, never will. Maybe people confuse fun with wreckless abandon. Fun doesn’t have to be wreckless, it can certainly be had sensibly. The parties involved do not have to lose their senses, common senses anyway. Most of us have some sort of self-control. Most of us do not have trust. And then again, why should we? Well, somewhere in here is an answer. I guess my main decision at this point, is whether I want to make a decision at all. I’m thinking the decision might take care of itself. I only hope the decision looks at all the possibilities. So, I was watching Northern Exposure. I was trying to watch, that is. I had a busy night and kept being interrupted, only caught bits and pieces. I can’t tell you why Chris asked the question. I’m not sure I caught the answer. But, it was that question that got a reaction from me. And, the question was: What is the meaning of my existance? My reaction: All I could do was laugh. |