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FAWLEY COMPLETE DOUBLE OVER SURVEY Fawley AFC can officially lay claim to being better than Ordnance Survey. After the arrival of 3 Millbrook chav's, many in the Survey camp were predicting a reversal of Fawley's 2-1 win in October. But a combination of discipline, commitment, and a fucking great keeper meant the honours of Totton college's best team (apart from maybe B.A.T, Blackfield and Langley and Salisbury) went to Fawley. To see a match report, dont click here, or here, but click here. FAWLEY TO DITCH BLACK N RED? Rumours from a source close to the club suggest that Fawley Under 18's are to go against tradition in favour of wearing a different coloured kit. The players have already voted and it appears that the strip of blue shirts, blue shorts and white socks is the player's preffered choice. Many loyal fans, who were watching Fawley in the days of Douglas Hawkins, have reacted angrily to the prospect of changing a huge part of Fawley's proud history. However, the general view from the players is that they 'don't give a shit cos it's umbro innit'. Perhaps this is understandable, as for many of the young playersat this club, it is their dream to one day pull on shirt with the likes of Umbro, Nike and Gola on the front. BLAKE+BRANNIGAN FAREWELL ENDS ON A LOW NOTE Fawley were dumped out of the Mickey Mouse cup after a 2 – 0 defeat to Lordswood United. It was also the last time that Matt ‘I’m a greedy fuck’ Blake and midfield general Kier B played in a Fawley shirt, retiring to concentrate on making money. These may not be the only departures, after Woody declared; ‘Every body is proper shit, their all shit’ This is the biggest hint yet that Woody is not happy at Fawley, and after proudly declaring that he now gets to use walky-talkies at work, it seems the chances of him staying are slim. With three key players leaving the team, it is feared that many others will follow, until the dreaded day when Ben Hawkins and Bubba will both start a game. Nobody wants this, but it may be inevitable. ANDOVER TURNED OVER BY WOODY/STEVE/BUBBA Fawley marched into the quarter finals of the Salvage Cup after an impressive win over Andover New Street. 5 goals from the Woodlander, plus a goal each from Steve and Bubbsy sets up a host of mouth watering potential ties. The other teams to progress are: Ordnance Survey Hiltingbury Bashley Hamble A Lordswood Hedge End/ Sarisbury Sparks Crofton When asked who Fawley would like to play, Keeper Danny Parker said: ‘Ordnance Survey’ When asked why, he replied: ‘Cos they’re shit innit’ A view which is shared by many. FAWLEY MISS OUT ON KENNY BIRD Fawley may finally have to admit defeat in the chase for the signature of Ordnance Survey legend Kenny Bird. The gifted play maker yesterday confirmed that he is on the verge of signing a contract at Division 3 team AFC Midanbury. The news will come as a great dissapointment to Fawley fans who have been looking forward to watching Kenny's unique skills tear apart defences in the race for the title. It was clear that Kenny was not happy at Survey, and this statement provoked a frenzy of clubs fighting for his signature. "I feel I have grown too big for this club. It is time to move on. With players like Dan Ley and Merryman in the team each week, it makes you wonder why I bother playing with such amateurs." However Kenny has still confirmed his passion and commitment for the College third team, where his late sub appearance on Wednesday just showed what a talent he is. "I feel playing with the third team will help my game. There are probably a few aspects of my game that I could improve, like running in the same direction as the ball." You can watch Kenny Bird in action every Wednesday afternoon on the sidelines of the 3rd team pitch. FAWLEY ESCAPE PUNISHMENT Fawleys title charge is back on after the FA decided it would be unfair to deny a such talented team like Fawley the chance of winning a league that is rightfully theirs. REGISTRATION COCK UP PUTS TITLE IN DOUBT Fawley's hopes for a second title in two years have taken a major blow with the news that the three points gained on Sunday are likely to be taken away as a result of fielding an un-registered player. Ex - Hythe and Dibden player Simon Bird was not properly registered after his forms were not correctly filled in. Despite an easy 6 - 2 win for us on Sunday, the game will go down as a 2-0 away win for Eastleigh Gimps, their biggest win in their history. This punishment is not yet official and there is still a small chance that we could get away with a less severe punishment for what is surely just a small cockney error. ANDOVER NEW STREET NEXT UP FOR FAWLEY Fawley’s reward for demolishing Hythe and Dibden is an away tie against first division basement boys Andover New Street. ANS are currently joint bottom of the division with Hythe, which has given Fawley confidence that we can get into the quarterfinals of the Salvage Cup for the first time. FAWLEY GET DRAW DESPITE ROCKET MATCH FIXING Fawley AFC drew for the first time in their 2-year history, in a match against a Hedge End team that have lost to Eastleigh Gimps but beat S+D. Match report However, it was stories of match fixing that will be getting the headlines, after Fawley centre back Matt Blake did his best to sabotage a game that looked as if it was in the bag. He gave away two late penalties, which nearly cost us all three points, and have sparked rumors that the star defender has accepted a large payment in return for a Fawley defeat. Blakey has recently been accused of growing too big for his boots and losing his passion for the team, after his call up for the college first team. And after yesterday’s display, the rocket powered, rocket nosed defender didn’t do much to suggest he was committed to the team. After the game, Blakey released this statement: ‘My bad’ Yeh your bad Blakey. FAWLEY HIT 5 PAST SORRY HYTHE Revenge was finally gained more than a year after the embarassing 6 - 0 defeat at Jones Lane. The 5 - 2 win over first division rivals Hythe and Dibden was made even sweeter by that fact that Fawley are now through to the 3rd round of the prestigious Salvage cup at the expense of our bitter rivals. It also means Fawley have won 5 from 6 of their opening fixtures and another title + piss up in May seems closer every day. Match report CUNNINGHAM CAUGHT UP IN BRAWL IN FAWLEY PISS UP Fawley reserve keeper Andy Cunnigham was last night caught up in a fight in a club in Bournemouth. The lanky ladies man (got a well fit bitch) was seen being twated in the eye by a gang of youths at Elements in Bournemouth. Elsewhere, striker Matt Wood and Matt Blake went on a pub crawl in Bournemouth, whilst Kyle and Kieran Branogonaligan got wasted in Elements. Wee Paulie, Bromley, Ryandinho and Sunday's hero Adam Elliott were all seen 'avin it large' in the same club. This again has sparked rumours that there is a drink culture at the club, which all players have totally denied. NEXT FAWLEY PISS UP : FRIDAY NIGHT, McLuskys, 8:30, followed by PARTY IN SALISBURY, 8:30 onwards FATBOY + ANDY GO AWOL Larger than life striker Benny Hawkins was no where to be seen during todays game against Survey. After the team was announced, without even a place on the bench, Ben left the stadium in a hurry. Strike partner Als explained: 'I think he only came for the Jaffas' This is probably true, but it does seem a bit harsh treatment to a man who attends every training session. Perhaps he should follow the attitude of a fellow team mate Bubba, who, despite being a bag of shit at football, has stuck by his team no matter what. Asked if he felt annoyed at being dropped after his brilliant display last week, The Bubsta replied: 'Buh la urrrrr mmmm jaffas bub buba plish' A very good point by the Bubbsta there. Elsewhere, where the hell is Andy Cunning ham? After his appearance against Eastleigh Gimps, Andy has not shown, despite two occassions where Danny Parker was missing. Luckily, Sam the Flying man is also a useful keeper, aslong as the opposition aren't allowed to shoot from the half-way line. GEORGE MICHAEL HAS FAITH, TO RESCUE FAWLEY. Fawley again showed their title credentials after their 3rd league win, despite not playing in the usual Fawley way. The 2-1 win over Ordnance survey means Fawley maintain their unbeaten start to the season, which has seen two of what looked to be Fawley's strongest rivals for the title, left reeling. After the match, goal scoring hero Adam Elliott, aka George Michael said: ' You gotta have faith, and i said to the boys, lets go outside and shoot the dog'. I think what he means to say is that he was pleased with the victory. Match report here ALS + MACCA GRAB POINTS FOR FAWLEY Fawley gained revenge on S+D despite the oppenents dirty tactics, in a 2-1 home victory. In the 2nd half, S+D took advantage of the fact that the ref forgot to bring the cards by chopping out as many players as possible. But whilst they concentrated on the kung-fu, we concentrated on the scoring, as Als and Macca wrapped up a match which couldnt of been a bigger contrast to the cup performance. Click here for match report SUPER BUBBA RESCUES FAWLEY As Fawley looked set to be facing another cup exit, who should rescue them but Kyle 'Messiah' Bubblington. With 5 minutes left, we trailed 2 - 0 and hopes of playing Hythe and Didben had all but dissappeared. We were on the counter-attack and the ball landed at Bubba's feet. Naturally, every Fawley player turned back, to prepare for a goal-kick. But to everyones amazement, the big-lipped bender rounded the keeper and twatted the ball into the empty goal from a tight-angle. As if that wasnt enough, it was none other than 'when do i get a first name?' Bromley who scored the crucial last minute goal to take the game to extra time. A goal from the on form Alex Coutts, plus another screamer from Bubbdinho sealed the win for Fawley and set up what promises to be a thriller against the scum that is Hythe and Dibden. LATE SIGNINGS HELP FAWLEY TO COMFORTABLE WIN New keeper Andy 'Lanky streak of piss' Cunningham had an outstanding debut, which was only overshadowed by the Cat man, Alex Coutts. After deciding not to retire from club football last week, Coutts banged in a hattrick against Eastleigh Gimps. Macca and Kyle hit in another 2 each to make the final score 7-1 to Fawley, a great morale booster after last weeks narrow loss to S+D. At half time, the score was 1-1, both sides missing plenty of chances. Martin brings on Kier and D, Fawley score 6, what more can i say? THE EGG BREAKS WRIST IN GOAL MOUTH 'SCRAMBLE' (sorry) New winger Eric 'Egg' Eggerson suffered a suspected broken wrist during Sundays game. This is not certain and we only have Dempseys word for it. Which probably doesn't count for alot. PARKER TO RETURN Keeper Danny Parker has said he will stay on at Fawley after stating a few weeks ago that there was no chance of this occuring. The agile shot stopper is currently on taking a holiday to reflect on his actions and calm down, in hope of making a fresh start when he returns. However, after Andys display on Sunday, a swift return to the first team is not guranteed. PARKER LIKELY TO QUIT AFTER BUST UP It looks unlikely that keeper Danny Parker will ever play for Fawley again after a bust up with manager Martin during Sundays friendly with Fawley U16s. The incident resulted in Danny being sent off, after which he stormed off to the changing rooms. Parker is a vital member of the Fawley set up and players and fans do not want to see him leave. Hopes that Parker would come back to his senses, were dashed when manager Martin Hall posted an advert for a new keeper on the CSYL message board, confirming our fears that Danny Parker has quit. With only days before Fawleys first competitive game of the season, its touch and go whether the gaffer can bring in a quality replacement for a Fawley legend. FAWLEY OVERCOME UNDER 16S/UNDER 15s Thursday night saw an untested Fawley under 18s take on Hythe Strikers Under 15s in a contest which was only ever going to go one way. The score was 6 - 0 at the end, with a debut goal from The Bubbsta, proving his critics wrong once again. On Sunday, we faced a harder test from Fawley under 16s. It was generally a poor performance from us, not helped by the first half dissmissal of keeper Danny Parker, whose future at the club is now uncertain. From the two games played optimism is not high. The prospect of Blakey, Woody and now Parker not featuring in the first team every week has brought doubts over the strength of this years team and repeating the success of last year will be a huge task HALL TO RE-SIGN? Hardman winger Kyle Hall has made a shock U-turn on his decision to leave the club. After announcing his departure at the end of last season, Fawley began the search for a replacement. But it seems that Kyle just couldn't bear the thought of giving up the fantastic atmosphere he has experienced and become accustomed to at the club. His original plan was to go to Navy college, but after being bummed 3 times on taster day, he decided he (and his ass) couldn't take anymore and decided to quit, returning to the club that has taken his career to a new level. This decision will come as great news to the Fawley AFC fans who enjoyed watching Hall skinning and clattering left-backs week in week out. It will also give Fawley some added strength as they prepare to make the step up to Under 18s, Division 2. .................................................................................................................................... |