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| MATCH REPORTS |
(h). . . Ordnance Survey. . . W 3 - 2 Silly Sally Ally gifts Fawley bragging rights It was Survey who left Blackfield with their heads held lower than my Grandma's tits, after Fawley eventually came out on top, despite a second half revival from football's equivelent of Spar. Both team's fielded a strong team, however it was in between the sticks where the biggest difference could be seen. If Danny Parker was Gordon Banks, his opposite number would probably be Massimo Taibi. And the gulf in class became very clear when Fawley raced into a 2 - 0 lead, with Survey struggling to get a shot in. Fawley's defence was dominant in the first half, with Dan Lay totallly inaffective thanks to the supreme skills of modest left-back Ryan Deluchi. The 2nd half saw changes for both teams. For survey, Rich Sim's replaced Lovell in goal, and Steve Lace came on for Daniel Lay. Realising that things were going smoothly and his team were playing well, Mad Mart decided to take drastic action bring off the captain. Although this move may have shown the logic of a blindfolded sheep, the Fawley soldiers had to continue. Survey, however, came out strongly and put pressure on an increasingly shaky Fawley defence after the departure of the injured Dan Greatorex. But Fawley were still lethal on the break, and a strategically placed shot against the shins of Ally White from Cunningham ended up in the back of the net to give Fawley a cushion. With the game now all but wrapped up, Fawley decided to rest. We also felt a bit guilty and cruel for picking on such a poor and vulnerable team. Poor little Simmo looked like he was about to cry and so from the kindness of out hearts, we let them have 2 goals. But instead of accepting this kind gift, they decided to chop out Fawley baby Dom McMonagle. This resulted in a full scaled riot. One Survey player was heard saying: ''### your ##### little ### and #### you #### ####' We believe this is Millbrook speak for 'Calm down lads, it's just a game' Despite some frantic play at the end, and one or two decent saves from Danny 'Our Saviour' Parker, it was Fawley that came out on top and continue on their quest for promotion, whilst the poor little mappers took another step towards Division 3 football. (h). . . Hiltingbury. . . D 3 - 3 (a). . . Sarisbury Sparks. . . W 4 - 3 Fawley ride luck but collect all 3 points Fawley grabbed a much needed win to boost confidence ahead of some crucial fixtures in the coming weeks. After both Hamble and Hiltingbury had battered Sarisbury, there was added pressure to score lots of goals against Sparks. 3 0 up at half time, and it looked like we were going to do just that. (a). . . Hiltingbury. . . L 3 - 2 Blind old linesman gives Hiltingbury shock win. Hiltingbury gained a big advantage over Fawley in the race for promotion, much thanks to an old man with a flag. Nope, it wasn't Simon Bird showing his support, but the Hiltingbury manager pretending to understand the offside rule. After going 2 - 0 up thanks to an offside that was more blatantly obvious than Hunchie's nipples, Fawley had it all to do. Despite grabbing one back, our rivals managed to restore the advantage after some slack defensive play. Woody scored late on, but some late pressure couldn't rescue a point for Fawley, who suffered two consecutive defeats for the first time. (a). . . Lordswood. . . SALVAGE CUP. . . L 2 – 0 Poor Fawley display ends run Fawley’s dreams of a league and cup double went out the window, and December’s training regime of replacing all forms of exercise with alcohol and fat, is taking the blame. We were slow to start the game, and Lordswood soon deservedly took the lead. As we tried to remember how to kick a ball, we managed to keep the score at 1 –0 until we were confident enough to make a pass. The second half began a lot better, with Lordswood pinned in their half for the majority of it. But we were vulnerable to the counter attack and there was a limit to how many saves Danny Parker could make. 2 – 0 down with 20 minutes left, usually a challenge that we would relish. But with hardly a shot on goal in the second half, everybody knew it wasn’t our day. The win means we will concentrate on winning the league, or fall apart due to key departures. (a). . . Andover New Street. . . SALVAGE CUP. . . W 7 – 2 Wood bangs in 5 to put Fawley into quarters Fawley are into the quarter finals after the legend Matt Wood made it 8 goals in 2 games against 1st division strugglers Andover New Street. We started with a strong team, apart from 6th choice keeper Kyle Hall, who deputized between the sticks. We started brightly and it wasn’t long before Woody broke the deadlock after a slick through ball from the pussycat, Alex Coutts. Steve then converted a penalty after a handball. The unstoppable woodland dweller then went on to slam in another 4 goals to seal the game. Andover new they had been truly stuffed when the super-lipped striker Cornelius Bubblington hit a sweet half volley to rub salt in the wounds. Elsewhere, deputy keeper Kyle ‘What? I’m not allowed to pick it up outside my box??’ Hall had a brilliant game in goal, despite taking more time to dive to the ground than Beanhead takes to get his dick up. (H). . . Eastleigh Gimps. . . W 6 – 2 Gorgeous Woody smashes 3 to get Fawley back on track The Eastleigh keeper has now taken the ball out of net 13 times against Fawley this season, thanks to a Matt Wood hatrick in an simple run out for us. But it wasn’t going to plan at first, after a lanky Gimp sprinted through the defence to give them a deserved lead. New signing Si ‘Old man scoop’ Bird had two good chances to score on his league debut, but despite being officially 9ft 3, managed to miss an easy header. But we soon got back into the game thanks to two clever passes from egg loving left back Ryan Deluchi, finished off brilliantly by Woody and Kyle. Woody extended the lead after some Massimo Taibi style goalkeeping let him through on an empty net. After half time, Kieran Brannogonloigan replicated his mid-week screamer for the brilliant college third team, this time with his right foot. Matt ‘dweller of the hedge by the woods’ Woodrid then claimed his hatrick with a cool finish. Deciding that his Taibi impression wasn’t good enough, the Gimps keeper went for the Cudicini v Arsenal stunt, pulling it off to perfection, allowing Macca to seal the win. Eastleigh grabbed a goal but it was too late to have any impact on the game. The win ensures we stay in at least second place in the league. (A). . . Hedge End Rangers. . . D 4 - 4 First draw in Fawley history slows Fawley title charge. Fawley threw away a 3-1 lead but salvaged a point, after Liamdinho’s late equalizer. Starting with 3 at the back again, the Fawley defence was often caught out 4 against 3, Hedge End using their wingers to great effect. Hedge end took the lead. Fawley tried some mind games, with striker Alex Coutts hurling himself into the net to try and put off the keeper, to no effect. But eventually Steve grabbed a stunning equalizer, with a curling first time lob. Within 3 minutes we had taken the lead, after a goal mouth scramble saw skipper Wazza poke the ball in the net. After the break, we stretched our lead through Beanhead, scoring with a trademark screamer. Just as things were looking good for Fawley up stepped Blakey who did his best to ruin the match for Fawley. Not content with giving away just one penalty and narrowly avoiding a red card, Blakey then punched the ball in the box, in full sight of the ref to give Hedge End the chance to take the lead, after their earlier equalizer. They converted both penalties, despite Dan's best efforts. But Blake’s evil plan to lose the game was foiled when the impressive Liam Dempsey came on as a late sub and barged his way through defenders, and the keeper, Big Mac style, to draw level with minutes left. (H). . . Hythe and Dibden. . . SALVAGE CUP. . . W 5 - 2 There is only one team on waterside Fawley march on in the cup after victory over fierce rivals Hythe and Dibden in what was one of Fawley's best displays in recent memory. Before the game we knew it would take something special to overcome a team we hadn't beaten in 4 years. But despite this statistic, there was a belief that we could come up with the goods. But after Naidoo scored a header in the first 10 minutes, it looked like we were in for a slaughtering. But one man wouldn't accept this. One man wouldn't pull down his pants and bend over to Hythe and Dibden. One man would drag his team back into the match if it meant dying. The name of that man? Bubba. He courageously cheered on the team and due to this, we equalised within minutes through skippa Wazza Frampton, with a low curling drive. With confidence back, Fawley then took the lead through a beautiful free kick from Beatorex, who gave the ball a trademark beat into the the top corner. The flood gates opened and Fawley ran riot as Hythe's defence was left wide open more times than Bean's mum's legs have been in the last week. Macca grabbed another two to make the half time score 4 - 1. Second half was more relaxed and we allowed Hythe to come back in the game for the first 10 minutes. But thanks to a brilliant through ball from Hythe keeper Jesse, Woodworm wrapped up the match with a stylish finish. Hythe left-back Kieran Girl scored a flukey concelation from a free kick, but there was only ever one team in this match, and now, only one team on Waterside. (A). . . Ordnance Survey. . . W 2-1 George Michael helps Fawley come from behind It was the Fawley boys that won the battle of the Tottoners, with a little help from some Brockenerds. Both teams put out some Totton college scummers (no disrespect, but thats what we are), but it was one in particular that made the difference in the end. After a bright opening from us, it was Survery that took the lead against the run of play. The wind took us by suprise and a Merry man slotted in for the home team. Despite many chances, we couldn't break the dead lock before half-time. After the break, we came out the better side again and after some early pressure, last years top goal scorer Macca chipped in a lovely curling shot, in off the crossbar. The game become more open after that, both teams playing well. But with Steve on the left and wee Paulie on the right, the use of the wings was too much for Survey to handle. Eventually though it was the man that with no position, Adam 'George Michael' Elliott, who won the game with a piece of technical brilliance from just inside the 18 yard box. The win should mean Fawley stay near the top of the table. (H). . . S+D. . . W 2-1 Als and Macca scored the goals to avenge the 10-1 cup defeat of 3 weeks ago After being narrowly stuffed 10-1 by S+D just three weeks ago, few would of expected this result. But after 6 changes were made to the team that lost in the cup, hopes were high before the game. The first 20 minutes were fairly even with both sides creating chances. The breakthrough came when the on form cat man Alice Coutts used a sweet flick, turn and volley to fool the keeper into chucking the ball into his own net. Half time was 1-0 and we were on course. As the game wore on and our lead didnt look like being broken, The Big Mac grabbed a priceless second, from a delicate lob over the stranded S+D keeper. S+D realised that they were getting no-where by trying to play normal football and so resorted to 'hack football'. Despite temporarily injuring Danny Beatorex, these brutal tactics seemed to have no effect on Fawley. Eventually they scored a consolation goal, but it was Fawley who took the first blood in what looks like a good bet to be the two teams challenging for the title this year. (A). . . AFC Midanbury. . . SALVAGE CUP. . . W 4-3. . The Bubbsta hit his first two Fawley goals and helped them to the next round Fawley came from two goals down to secure a narrow victory over Division 3 minnows Midanbury, thanks to the two most unlikely scorers on the pitch, Bubba and Bromley. The pair scored a goal a piece in the last minutes of the game, which was then finished off in extra time by Als and Bubba. See lastest news for an in depth report (A). . . Eastleigh Gimps. . . W 7-1. . Fawley signalled their intent by going straight to the top of the league. Without Woody Danny Parker and Blakey available for selection, the gaffer knew he'd have to make changes to avoid another embarassing defeat. Thats exactly what he did. And he got a bit carried away, with only 'Breakfast boys' Bean, Egg and Danny Wheatobix keeping their place from the week before. Although 'The Profs' team selection madness has worked many times before, this what not one of them. Half-time 1-1, after the Catman finished with style after 30 seconds of play. Half-time saw a change to 3 - 4 - 3 and the introduction of pint-sized play maker Kieran Brannoginans and Ryan Deluchi aka Briane Deane. This had immediate effect as Fawley took the lead no less than 30 seconds after the restart. After that it was only going one way. Once again the defence kept Eastleigh's chances to a minimum aswell as setting up a number of chances for the Fawley strikers. The combination between the midfield and strikers was too classy for the Gimps who just couldn't handle it. Als grabbed a hattrick, whilst Big Mac and Kyle hit another 2 to finish the rout. The win shows that Fawley mean business again this year. Bearing in mind this emphatic win was achieved without 3 key players, things are looking good at the club. |