This article appeared in the December 2, 1905 edition of
The Evening Journal, a San Francisco, CA newspaper.
It was written by Julia Ann Garrison. The skip in the print [----]
is due to a very poor copy in the newsprint and due to a fold and the age of
the copy.
GREAT EXAMPLE IN ALLITERATION
JOURNAL CONTRIBUTOR EXHIBITS EXTRA ORDINARY KNOWLEDGE OF ENGLISH
PORTERVILLE'S PRESS
Peter Pencilpusher published Political Problems, Porterville's principle paper.
Patrick Patricks published Prohibition, Porterville's prohibition party paper.
Peter paid printers, pressmen, proofreaders princely payments - principally Porterville's prices.
Peters paper proudly, persistently proclaimed Porterville's prosperous position;
peaceful prospects; plenteous producticus - principally potatoes, peaches, pears,
plums, parsnips, parsley, prunes, pickles, peanuts, peppers, pomegranates, pieplant,
persimmons, pearmains, pork-packing, pickeling, preserving, prospective possibilities
premeditated.
Political Problems puffed prominent people, pushed promising prospects, patronized
particular party politicians, preferred pacific political policy platforms, promising
profitable positions, procuring public places. Peter's Political policemen,
perfidious politicians, pettifogging publicans, profligates, "promoters".
Patrick printed pithy, pointed paragraphs proclaiming Prohibition's political policy
perfect, protecting private property, plain people, prominent persons, pulpit, platform,
press; proscribing polluting public places; pronouncing Prohibition's policy perfecting
plain, politically practicable, protecting public possessions, public productions;
preventing panics, promoting peace, producing plenty, power, progress, perfection.
Patrick's paper - Prohibition - proclaimed Peter's paper - Political Problems -
presented political policies, pampered popular persons, promoted pilfering poor, plodding
people - pretending protection, pacifying protests. Paying "promoters" public
possessions, presenting puzzling problems producing panic.
Peter's paper published protests pronouncing Patrick's paper - Prohibition -
pernicious, puerile, pretentious, portraying pugnacious procclivities, politically
presumptive, practically, powerless, presenting paralogism, presumably paying Patrick's
pockets plentiful profits, procuring public printing pledges pending political
proportionment, preferment, public patronage. Peter proclaimed Patrick's
prohibition pretensions pertaining purifying politics perfectly peccant, possibly
producing panic, political pandemoniom, preventing pacificatory propositions;
prejudicial, perverting popular policies, protessions, previous practices; producing
poertentious, pessimestic pitiful predicaments.
Patrick patiently, particularly perused Peter's proclamations pertaining
Prohibition's policy. "Prevarative, preposterous", protested Patrick.
Pending preparing proper preliminary punitive proceedings, Patrick plied pungent pen
properly, probing Peter's private past pitilessly, provoking public prattle
plentifully.
Patrick printed Peter's picture portraying Peter playing poker. Pretending
Peter patronized poolrooms, packed polling places, played polo ponies, probably
practiced polygamy; paid private police protection, procured pistol permit presumably
premeditating puncturing Patrick's physical proportions.
Peter's patience practically petered perusing Patricks profuse pyro----------
------------------provoking--------------------------. Peter proclaimed
Patrick's peculiar proselyting propaganda pernicous, pestiferous, prestidigitating
people perditionward. Peter pronounced Patrick's persistence preposterous,
parading presuming presidential possibilities, preventing prosecuting purseproud
public pirates practising profuse prodigality pertaining public property, prescribing
policemen "punching" petty pilfers, punishing poachers, protecting prize pummellers.
Peter's penetrability perceived Patrick paying priests precautionary penance
potentially pallating prosepctive Purgatory's pangs. Peter proposed
"Princely Prevaricator" Patrick's proper pseudonym. Porterville's
prominent patriarchs pleaded peaace, pledging Porterville's press perpetual patronage
provided permanent pacific policies prevailed possessing profound principals, peaceful
partisansip, promoting Porterville's prestige preeminence, popularity.
Provided particular party proved pestiferous, perverse preventing peaceful proposition
Porterville's populace proposed perverse party pack partmanteau, put pellmell.
Peter promptly pidgeonholed Porterville's protect pleading, pressing political
preceeding positively prevented prompt, pertinent promises. Patrick's
precaution, personal pride, profuse persiflage pervailed. Peter promised
propriety, proposed perpetual partnership panacea, published polished panegyric
presetnted Patrick's pure patriotism, profound piety, personal perfection.
Patrick politely palavered pertaining Porterville's popular partnership paper -
Prohibition Problems.
|