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The
Book of Our Lady of Perpetual Open Disapproval
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7:1 |
During the wanderings of FishGod there was at the same time a woman living in the land of FishGod's home, and her name was MArs, which was pretty cool. |
| 7:2 |
And as the word of FishGod's love did spread through his home, Mars did catch wind of it and did frowna nd shake her head disapprovingly. |
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7:3 |
This was very strange, for there was no one around, and it was quite clear that she was trying to prove something to herself. |
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7:4 |
But lo, her heart was pure, as demonstrated by the occasional smile which she did crack before she remembered that she was far too intelligent for the likes of whomever she happened to be talking to. |
| 7:5 | And it was agreed throughout the land that she did indeed have the first documented case of short woman's disease. |
| 7:6 | It did come to pass that FishGod's Apostates traveled through that town, and Zeb, who was first among the Apostates did question Mars, saying "Why disapprovest thou of FishGod, and why scowleth thou as if thou didst have a stick of considerable length up thine ass?" |
| 7:7 | And MArs did reply, saying, "Oh, shut up, Apostate of FishGod. For thou art giving me a headache with thine idiocy." |
| 7:8 | And behold, no one did know what she was talking about. |
| 7:9 | And verily, neither did she. |
| 7:10 | For the space of 5 days did Zeb pester Mars, during which time she did continue to protest that he was not making much sense. |
| 7:11 | And behold, after 5 days of harrassment, he was not. |
| 7:12 | After much groaning and gnashing of teeth did Mars realize that Zeb did have a point, but she did continue to deny it, claiming that she had a headache. |
| 7:13 | Which is just like her. |
| 7:14 | And Zeb did return home at that time to ponder Mars. He did say unto himself, "How is it that she hath hardened her heart against FishGod so, and yet liveth without so much as a boil or something?" |
| 7:15 | And suddenly, Zeb was taken up in a vision. He did see the cosmos laid out before him, and so too its inner workings. |
| 7:16 | And a voice did speak to Zeb, saying "Verily, Mars is like unto an ape, but tell her this not lest she goeth 'What?' and sneereth condescendingly. |
| 7:17 | "But between thou and me, Mars is like unto an ape of justice which serveth FishGod but entereth not into the Sphere of Glory, just as a good butler doth not use the family's pool, least of all during a party." |
| 7:18 | The vision did fade, and Zeb did leave Mars alone, for which she was very grateful. |
| 7:19 | But Zeb did preach of Mars' holy service to all men, and did tell them, "Verily, FishGod hath spoken, and henceforth thou shalt worship Mars as our Lady of Perpetual Open Disapproval." |
| 7:20 | And so it shall be. |
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