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The New Bob World Guardian, PO Box OU812, Septic City, New Bob
Saterdee, Janyewery 11,2003





EXTRY!! EXTRY!!!
REED ALL ABOUT IT!!!



TROUBLE A BREWING
IN RODHAM COUNTY





Presendint Taps Camp LeTreen,
Seymour Butts Air Force Base

By Eustacious "Who What Where" McKinney

SEPTIC CITY - Sgt. Arnold "Jump Start" McKinney might not be able to finish the roof he's building over his deck. He might be sent to Rodham County instead.

Jump Start is a part-time, semi-commissioned readiness officer with Company RC of the 41st Foot Soldier Fungus and Head Lice Removal Battalion in Fat City. It's one of two New Bob Army National Guard units based in New Bob put on alert for possible deployment as tensions with Rodham County escalate.

"They have been alerted, but that does not mean that they will definitely be mobilized," said Capt. Leon "Bingo" McKinney, a spokesman for the Army National Guard in Septic City. "It's not unprecedented for a unit to be de-alerted, give me another drank of that Ara Cee."

But Jump Start isn't taking any chances. He's getting his personal affairs in order and filling out reams of paperwork for all the other members of the unit, which has an authorized strength of 3 members.

"They alert us so we can take care of things, whether it's giving our old ladies power of attorney or making a will," Jump Start said. "The old battelaxe ain't too happy about all this, on account of I'm leaving ever thang to my dog instead of her, but I think she's handling it pretty well."

The 13,451st Transportation Company, a lunch-truck-driving unit also called the Choke & Puke Brigade, headquartered in Piggly Wiggly Valley, was put also on alert Tuesday. The unit has detachments in Rock City and Ruby Falls and has an authorized strength of 4 members.





Family members wave goodbye to the 13,451st Transportation Company, lunch-truck-driving unit also called the Choke & Puke Brigade in Piggly Wiggly Valley.





Friendly natives welcome the Choke & Puke Brigade to Rodham County.



The Choke & Puke Brigade is part of the 8,540th Quarterpounder Battalion, headquartered in Juniortown. The unit was last deployed during previous election over the big stink with Idjit BoB at the Bull Frog Headquarters (photo below.)



The Choke & Puke Brigade also served at Fort Boogerman after the tragic accident
involving the Lee sisters, Holm and Ugh.

Two Jarines from Camp Letreen and a fighter pilot from Seymour Butts Air Force Base will leave for Rodham County during the next few days, officials said Friday. Two other Jarines from the base have already been sent to the region.

There is 1 more member in the 4th Fighter Wing Cleanup Brigade from Seymour Butts. But it is unlikely he will be sent to the region, said base spokesperson Sgt. Flagrunts "Sweeper" McKinney.

"We still have to complete our missions here," Sweeper said. "Here... wood yew have some more Tom's Redskin Peanuts, Eustacious?"





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