Okay, you may be bustin' a capillary cryin' about how "this is NOT a horror/sci-fi movie!" and "why the fuck would this be on a horror/sci-fi site?!", but all I can reply with is "they're having a screening of SCREAM 3 in your rectum, so stick your head up your ass and tell me what you think!". If I haven't said it enough, then allow me to repeat my previous words (said in numerous locations throughout this site), "IT'S MY FUCKING SITE, AND I'LL OUT WHATEVER I DAMN WELL DESIRE ON IT!!!!!". Hey, if you don't like my preferences, my opinions, my site in general, then do everyone a favor and DON'T look at it! If you all hate me so much, then why do you keep coming here (alright, so NO ONE comes here, but that's not the subject!)? Anyway, enough of me defending myself and my work, and allow me to cast my Godly judgment upon this pile of cinematic cock-and-schlock... The whole thing starts off with this little mock-warning about how everyone laughed when Hitchcock (as always, gotta love that name!) made THE BIRDS (we all know what that was about), but that years later a city was invaded by a huge flock of birds who wouldn't leave. Yes, little do the people know, but one of Nostradamus's lesser known prophecies foresaw the revolt of Supermarket produce sections! My Gods (that means me)! I've wasted so much space and I haven't even gotten into the movie yet!!! Okay, long story short: A government growth chemical meant to make bigger, stronger, faster (well, maybe not faster), all around BETTER tomatoes results in, what else, KILLER TOMATOES! Yeah, sounds like a million laughs a minute right? Well, the majority of this movie annoyed me... uhm, okay, the government puts together this special task force (more like "special ed class"), and after WAY too many bad jokes the fruits are defeated... by "Puberty Love". No, they weren't overcome by 10-13 year old boys and girls, but they WERE beaten by this fucking ANNOYING song, and the humans then stomp them into catsup (or ketchup depending on your social status). Oh yeah, and to make this more sci-fi in an X-Files vein, the US Press Secretary (aren't they ALWAYS the masterminds behind-the-scenes?) had planned to control the tomatoes and use them to... uhm... make a big salad? Uhm, turn them into sauce for a REALLY big pizza? Aw fuck, who the Hell knows! Anyway, if you are easily entertained (such as I) and can outlast 95 minutes of TERRIBLE gags (I can admit when I'm licked), then you are not only a better man/God then I, but you should see this movie. If you're like me and have your limits to stupidity, then go rent EMBRACE OF THE VAMPIRE and close the shades heh heh. Oh, and the worst part? There were 3 sequels to this... I don't know if I can withstand that much flesh hungry produce...

Sequels: RETURN OF THE KILLER TOMATOES; KILLER TOMATOES STRIKE BACK; and KILLER TOMATOES EAT FRANCE

If You Liked This Flick, Check Out: having yourself committed. The asylums are nice this time of year...