Utensil Drawer

My Stories


I really don't care if everyone like my stories or not. That's not the point. The point is for me to get these stories out.

I know that the content in my stories has the potential- potential, hell, it WILL offend someone somewhere. I don't care. If you find yourself offended by my view of reality, please remove head from sphincter and take a look around. It's not a pretty world, there are things you don't want to see in it.

These stories are:

However, I will only divide them into two sections for now, Original Fiction and Fan Fiction.

These are the stories I've finished. I'll put more up as soon as I finish them. I really hate it when I find a great story and the shitheads don't have the whole thing up. Yeesh.

As you can tell, I have no qualms about using language in my life, so expect to find some in my stories. *shrugs* It's a messed up world, so expect to find at least one or more of the following(and not all are bad):

  1. Violence. This includes but is not limited to:
    • violence against women
    • violence against inanimate objects
    • and/or violence against self.
  2. Romance between consenting adults.
  3. Same sex relations. Mainly lesbian, not as much gay. If you want gay action, go find another page.
  4. People who do not belong to me. I'm borrowing them and will return them to their proper places upon the termination of their use to me. This includes but is not limited to characters from:
    • Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon
    • Xena:Warrior Princess
    • the Land of Valdemar(I haven't decided on this one yet)
    • and/or Star Trek:Voyager
  5. Naughty, dirty language. I promise it won't be excessive, but to make things realistic, I had to include some.
  6. As the MPAA likes to say, "Adult Situations". For those of you who don't know what that means, it translates to "GETTING IT ON" i.e. "HEATING THE SHEETS" and "DOING THE HORIZONTAL MAMBO" and may include scenes that "MAY BE HAZARDOUS TO SOME VIEWERS HEALTH."
  7. References to popular culture. Not Britney Spears (I can't believe that name is on my page) type pop culture, well, not unless I'm making fun of it.
  8. and finally, EXPECT TO FIND REFERENCES TO THE COLUMBINE SHOOTING. IF you want to find out the answers to the myriad questions that I'M SURE you have, go here. Do not email me asking me questions that are answered on that page. I will only send you a link to that page, if I answer your pathetic email at all.

In case you couldn't tell, I'm not the most chipper of people. Don't worry, I don't make angsty stories. Well, at least I don't think so. My poetry can be angsty, but I digress. You want the stories and poems and shit...well here they are, in all their glory.

By the way...I really don't care if this is hard for you to read. Have a nice day. Wait, what am I saying? I don't care what kind of day you have. Yeah, I'm in a happy mood tonight.

Consider yourselves warned.


If you haven't been scared off by that, here's the fiction...and really, I'm nicer than that makes me sound...


ORIGINAL FICTION

Master Ruka

A lil lemony ficcie. Strong BDSM and explicit lesbian sex. Warning,reading of this fic has been known to cause people to feel...really really good in certain areas. Do NOT click if you do not enjoy bondage, a lil bit of pain, and or domination/submission! You click and it's on YOUR conscience.

The Proposal

This small piece of tripe is about a girl, a girl and a marriage proposal in the middle of a high school cafeteria.

A Cheerleader, Excuse Me, a Pom, and Her Butch

The things that keeping up with old crushes does to you...Take a wild guess how I was able to write this one. Butch/Femme. High school. PWP. Uses "hym" and "hymself" much like some butches and femmes tend to. One of my old fantasies. I WILL get hit for writing this one.

Jen and the Rider

I gave up on getting any further in this story without some sort of bloody input. It came from the idea of a chick driving up on a bike to a small town restaurant and needing a place to stay for the night. That's all I'm saying.

A Long Day at the Keyboard

This came to me one night as I sat the keyboard, oddly enough. Chick and her girlfriend get it on after a shoulder massage at the computer. Those of you who have spent a long time in front of your computer, you know what I mean.

Wilde as the Storm Winds

Believe it or not, I started this story in ninth grade. Five years later, I'm still working on it. This story is from my days as a mainstream romantic author..in other words, it involves male-female sex interaction. It may be revised...the main chick is just too..Xena to be fully straight. Still working on it.

The Dead Place

Sometime during my sophomore year, I lost the original copy of the story that became "Wilde as the Storm Winds". From that loss, I made "Wilde". Two years ago, I finally rediscovered my original copy. I was shocked at how much I had left out, so I began to write another story off of the same base line. This is that story. Still being written.

Gang Wars

I don't quite know how to classify this story. It screams "uber Xena" to me, but I don't know those characters well enough to make a story about them. So this is an original fic, influenced some by the Xenaverse. Being written.


FAN FICTION

55 Word Fanfiction

Straight (hah! right, good one) from the Xenaverse, it's a H&M inspired section of 55 word fanfiction! Dubbed the "Shortest Fiction on the Net", the 55 word fanfiction that has somewhat influenced the Xenaverse has now invaded the H&M island. ^^ Enjoy what little I have to offer.

Zipper Blues

The first of my Z-A challenge fics, this one...if I summarize it, I'll give it all away. Just read it. ^^

Absolute Destiny:Television

Second of my Z-A Challenge Fics! This one is also way too short to summarize *blush* Read, read, read! Both fics were written after Saun told me about her A-Z ficcie.

Hentai Test:What were YOU thinking?

I was talking to my son one afternoon, and the Foon told me to write a fic using the suggestive language he fed me. This is what came of that. Nifty little test to see how ecchi you are.

Ice Cream

No, I can't come up with a better title. Yes, I read the fic on the H&M fanfic center. This was written at the request of a fan. *mumbles* more like the threats... PWP. That means strong lemon flavoring. *grins* Have fun.

A Senshi Life For Me

Blame sleeplessness and Yuri for this one. Filk of "A Pirate's Life For Me" from the Pirates of the Carribbean ride in Disneyland. Haruka's POV. Amusing.

Leader of the Pack

My second songfic. I love this one too. I don't know why I love my songfics so. Read it. Why? BECAUSE I SAID SO.

TG Haruka Trilogy

A lil trilogy about Haruka and if she's transgendered. More notes on the page.

Girlfuckers, Inc.

My first filk, this was originally "Starfuckers, Inc." from Nine Inch Nails. If you know it, sing along! "Girlfuckers! Girlfuckers, Inc.!" The Senshi sing this one. Color coded so you know who's singing what *grin*

MST: Split Up?!?

If you have never heard of this fic before this MST, count yourself lucky. Not only are Haruka and Michiru HORRIBLY out of character, the author has very little knowledge of the Sailormoon universe. I would almost swear the author was a homophobe... It's obvious how much I despise this fic if you read this MST-ing. General anime references and references to the Fanboys fanfics.

Unexpected Homecoming

Another PWP, this one started in a butch-femme chatroom. Haruka and Michiru. Hym/he used to refer to Haruka.

Painfilled Paradise

Umm...I kinda got on a soapbox in the author's notes at the end. Haruka and Michiru are in Hawai'i and a late night question uncovers more than either one thought. Inspired by "Why won't you say you love me?" by Caster.

Hot Stuff

I wanted this to be a filk, but it turned into a fic instead. Michiru sings a song to Haruka which leads to a revelation for Haruka. Did I just give the whole plot away?

Hollywood Square Pegholes with a Side of Short Skirts

I wrote this after yet another night without sleep. It infested my brain at about 4 am and I couldn't sleep until it was finished. Nevermind that I had to be up fairly early the next day... I've been told this fic is funny. I like to think it is. Parody, satire.

"Medium Sized Lined Sheet of Paper on Too Much Sugar and Not Enough Sleep" Series
Part one
Part two
Part three

This is what happens when the title is true. This series is really just an excuse for me to be crazy in a fic. Inspired by Cele-chan's "Parody Fic" series. Go see her site. Now. Link is on link page(duh.).

Kaiou and Tenou Meet Haruka and Michiru:Part One-Kaiou

I've been told this story is one of my best. I beg to differ, but what can you do? *shrugs* This one came from being bored in class. In order to stay awake, I wrote this. Haruka and Michiru meet the Kaiou family. *shrugs* I don't much care if it's a tired old plot.

Kaiou and Tenou Meet Haruka and Michiru:Part Two-Tenou

The second part to the "Meet the Family" thingie I'm writing. Note it is NOT a sequel, but a preplanned thing that is a continuation of the first part. Just to clarify. Still in the lab.

Harem

A PWP set in, where else, a harem. This one is a bit different from most...the one who owns the harem? Female. Why is this PWP in the Fan Fiction section? Because it's kinda an uber Xena fic. In that when I wrote it, I had Xena and Gabrielle in mind and all. Rated R. What a shock. Since it actually has sex and stuff. Kinky sex. With a toy. Or rather, butch cock. Anyway.

In the Garage

At first, I was hesitant about posting this, then I figured, fuck it. It's a short short piece, especially compared to the Meet the Parents duo, the fragile, and the Squares piece. But it has it's own charm. I like this one. I could just see Michiru doing this on one of Haruka's off days. And don't tell me you can't see Michiru in Daisy Dukes and Haruka in coveralls!

Cradle of Love

All I need to say about this is that it is heavily inspired by the video for Billy Idol's "Cradle of Love".

Haruka's Theory

A classic PWP for the SM Universe. Haruka has a theory that gets her some play.

the fragile

I'll say it right now. This is one of my favorites of all of the stories I've ever written. I don't know why, I just love it. Michiru has an epiphany while listening to "the fragile" from Nine Inch Nails. There is no sex...just foreplay. Sorry, ecchi readers.

Vagaries of Being Wanted

I wrote this in response to a challege on a Haruka and Michiru message board. This fic comes with a bright neon warning:This fic has DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. This fic also has strong hurt/comfort themes and language and fantasy violence...This fic is rated R for the thinking impaired who do not want to see the reality of the world.

Erm...the Pool Story

How to explain this one..how how how....It's a piece of overworked tripe that my friends should recognize as 100% Spork. In other words...Do not read if you want to retain any shred of a hint of an illusion that I'm in anyway sane.

Senshi Among the Stars

Somewhat of a spoof. But halfway serious. I don't know quite how to describe this one. It's funky. Haruka and Michiru die at the end of Stars...where do they go? Here is the answer from my imbalanced brain...they are transported to the fevered dreams of a trekkie with food poisoning who's just returned from a long convention, in other words, Star Trek Voyager! This is really my first ever attempt at any sort of finished crossover...I personally think it sucks big fat sweaty donkey balls, but that's just me. STAR TREK VOYAGER ROCKS THE FREE WORLD!

Outers Bound

I was watching Bound one night and I thought, why not make it into a fic with Haruka and Michiru as Corky and Violet? Little did I know it would turn out THIS way...I'M WORKING ON IT!

Herald Sailor Senshi

This story I don't know if I'll ever release. It's a crossover of Sailor Moon and the lands of Valdemar. Since Mercedes Lackey actively prosecutes those who use her characters, I am seriously in doubt as to the release of this story. Sorry. Being written.









The fics are ^that^ way.