Diary Diary¡@
19/12/2002 (Thur)
I only have to wait less than 24 hrs!!!
This is the first time in my life to win a lucky draw!!!
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17/12/2002 (Tue)
I am always proud to have a brother like you!!! Happy Birthday~ ~ ~
Our first and last meal in Maastricht --> Shroama!!
For most of the time, I can respect cultural differences. But this time it's not differences, it's disrespect. I am sad and angry and disappointed.
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16/12/2002 (Mon)
I felt guilty when I eat; when I shop; and when I don't follow. Do I have to conform in everything? I am not angry, I am just puzzled. I feel ignorant to ask this question at my age...
I met my old friend yesterday --- insomnia.
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15/12/2002 (Sun)
I have been leaving home for exactly 4 months. Emotions have been undergone tremendous changes. Exclaimed; Curious; Lonely; Missing; Angry; Nervous; Annoyed; Enjoy; Liking; Longing... As others ask me to write autograph, then I realized how much I don't want to leave, how much I enjoy my time here. It's not a perfect exchange, but it is close to that. I learnt basically nothing academically, but I gained friendships. Though it's only been a few months, very deep communication is not possible, yet to some extent, we are connected, we are bonded.
Besides friendship, what have I got? I am better in enjoying life. Daddy was right, eating is not just to feed your physical needs, you will feel a thousand times better if you put a pot of flowers in the dinning table; turn off the light and put up some candles; open a bottle of wine or a can of coke; spend some creativity and add some love in cooking; and show your appreciation during eating.
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14/12/2002 (Sat)
The best pre-exam activity is crazy shopping!! The best pre-christmas activity is wrapping gifts for friends. Asian Dessert Party, will it be the last time I see them?
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11/12/2002 (Wed)
Life means devote two third of your life time burying yourself at work and full up your pocket with rocks... or arrive home at 5pm sharp, enjoy a meal with your love, chichat with two new friends, play with a lovely bunny and decorate christmas trees before going to cozy warm bed. I am not sure whether you can afford huge trees and tones of decorations if you stay home all day, but we do need to take some time out and treat outselves good. Earn a lot, enjoy less when you are young, and start to enjoy life after retirement. This appears completely non-sense to me. After treating yourself so harsh for 40 years, do you think one knows how to enjoy life?
A cooking and eating day. Spring rolls, fried rice, 'inverted apple pie', oliebollen!! How nice it is to cook and eat with a bunch of friends!!!The happiest moment comes when birthday song is sang in Japanese, Korean, Cantonese, Swedish and Italian AT THEM SAME TIME!!!
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10/12/2002 (Tue)
I started to miss my life here. Huge room, private kitchen, slow pace, fresh air, ancient buildings, lovely decorated homes, friendly smiles, non-crowded streets, knowing one-third of the people in the supermarket, gossip in a language only understandable to four. I used to wandering in streets, walk into small shops, then sit down for a drink and read. That was luxury for me, but it's my usual practice here.
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07/12/2002 (Sat)
Aachen - The first word appears in every dictionary, it is also the place where I finally got a hat that is large enough for me.
"This morning, when I was sitting in front of the window and taking a long, deep look outside at God and nature, I was happy, just plain happy. Peter, as long as people feel that kind of happiness within themselves, the joy of nature, health and much more besides, they'll always be able to recapture that happiness.
Riches, prestige, everything can be lost. But the happiness in your own heart can only be dimmed; it will always be there, as long as you live, to make you happy again.
Whenever you're feeling lonely or sad, try going to the loft on a beautiful day and looking outside. Not at the houses and the rooftops, but at the sky. As long as you can look fearlessly at the sky, you'll know that you're pure within and will find happiness once more." --- Anne Frank, Wednesday, 23 February 1944
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06/12/2002 (Fri)
11:40am, I am walking in the market witnessing large amount of white particles attack Maastricht. I want it to be snow, but feel so stupid to yell that out before any confirmation. As people's faces change and a call from roommate, I believe I see SNOW today, though it's for a while, it is wonderful enough for me.
When you encounter special experience, the first one who pops up into your mind, is the one you like the most at that time.
It's fun to have steamboat and drinking game, but it feels bad when you see people suffer.
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04/12/2002 (Wed)
I see something today...
He feeds her in the public, a spoon of chocolate; a sip of water.
They whisper mouth to ear, with tightly holding hands.
He wraps the scarf around her neck.
If this is done by young couples, all my hairs will stand up immediately. But if this happens between an old man and his paralysed wife in wheelchair. I am sure tears will fill up your eyes in seconds. She can barely move except little movements of her mouth. Yet he doesn't give her up, not leaving her in lifeless hospital. Instead he takes her out for Christmas shopping. Who bothers to take a paralysed person out shopping? She can't touch nor choose anyways. For him, everything comes so natural. Christmas is a time for family, so he shops with his wife, regardless of her physical appearance or condition. As he leaves for a while to return the tray, he pats his hand gently on hers, assuring her he will be back in a second. I see love today.
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03/012/2002 (Tue)
What a non-productive day! My heart is outside this room, away from the articles and flying out there anticipating something; someone; some moments...
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01/12/2002 (Sun)
Everybody is getting excited because everyone will be home or feel warm in less than a month!!
A mixture of jealousy, resentment and bitterness can make a tender person really cruel.
Procrastination: Hard work often pays off after time, but laziness always pays off now.
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2002 May June July Aug Sept Oct Nov Dec
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