By Jennifer (Javelin) Doak

*=episode title
Standard Disclaimer: The A-Team belongs to SJC and company, 
but the events in this story are not related to anything in real
 life, any appearance of such is totally accidental.

                        Vacation Time?

        The guys and Sparks could hear the people shouting in joy
at their arrival: "*The A-Team is Coming, The A-Team is Coming."
They were all thankful for the fact that The Team (Hannibal, B.A.,
Murdock, Face, and Sparks) had saved them: they were all *Alive at
five in the afternoon -- it was a miracle, because it had started
as a really *Bad Day on the Border, it was truly a *Black Day at 
Bad Rock.  As far as some of the religious leaders of the community
were concerned, they had survived a *Judgment Day.  But amidst the
*Blood, Sweat and Cheers, they knew that things had moved beyond 
just a *Theory of Revolution and that the metaphorical call "Timber!"
at the fall of the tyrannical local government had removed the fear
of such irrational deals as: *Lease with an Option to Die.   Soon 
they would have to leave to help others in need they would have 
to *Battle of Bel-Aire or *Body Slam a *Beast from the Belly of
a Boeing.  But after *Beverly Hills Assault missions, they needed
to *Breakout of their routine.  They needed a *Holiday in the Hills.
They began to travel on the *Road to Hope;  *Knights of the Road,
looking  for a *Nice Place to Visit.  They had gone from Coast to
Coast; they'd seen the high *Steel of New York and did a *West 
Coast Turn Around away from the *Heart of Rock and Roll, the land
of *Hot Styles and became *Moving Targets, doing *Deadly Maneuvers
and did not find a place to escape the *Big Squeeze of City Life.
Most everywhere seemed to be *A Desert Out There.  Except for 
Sparks' brilliant *Road Games, they were so unhappy they could 
have been *The Grey Team.  After all the *Trouble On Wheels, 
they decided to try rafting, to relax, but it was *Harder Than
it Looks.  They passed *the Bend in the River, to a lake.  In 
the middle of the lake on *The Island, they saw a woman, *In Plane
Sight, calling for help, they sailed across, with *Water, Water 
Everywhere between them, to find her having *Labor Pains.  *One 
More Time they had to help someone -- no time to consider the 
*Pros and Cons of the situation or vote on *White Ballots -- 
they decided upon a *Mission of Peace.
        After fighting off all the moss *Beneath the Surface of 
the lake and the *Double Heat of the sun, they were past *The 
Point of No Return.  They took the woman to a *Little Town 
with an Accent, where they could hear *The Belle's of Saint 
Mary's, *The Only Church in Town, ringing.  Sparks tried to 
comfort the woman and help her as the guys went looking for the 
doctor, because *The Doctor is Out.  Being *Out of Towers, they 
tried to move past the *Incident at Crystal Lake and find one 
of the two doctors in town.  The scary part was they were 
waiting for a wack-job -- they were *Waiting For Insane Wayne 
and the head Doc: *Cowboy George.  But there was *Trouble 
Brewing -- they were out helping people who had eaten the same 
*Recipe for Heavy Bread that was like *Pure-Dee Poison and also
people who were hurt during a *Fire.  Several houses caught on 
fire and Poof *There Goes the Neighborhood.  They went back to 
help Sparks help the woman.  On the way they saw a place to get
*A Cup o' Joe, where they could eat *Without Reservations, 'maybe
that'd help.' they thought.  
        When they got back, they found out is was a false alarm.  
She told them about how her husband, a former member of the 
*Sheriffs of Rivertown, had earned a *Bounty that been stolen 
from her by the *Children of Jamestown and "*The Spy Who Mugged 
Me" she explained.  He had earned a *Crystal Skull after winning
a *Showdown with more bad guys that were selling' *Diamonds 'n' 
Dust and gold that had already been tried in the age old "*Trial 
by Fire."  They tried to run to save their *Skins – he had had to
*Waste ‘em.  After that *Small But Deadly War, all that could be 
heard was the *Sound of Thunder in the distance.  He died, but 
he was the *Champ!  'We are apart now,' she said, 'We'll never 
have a *Family Reunion, because we parted at his death, because 
we swore '*Til Death do us Part.'"
        Soon they reached the restaurant.  But they should have 
know that *There’s Always a Catch; they soon found that *Members 
Only could enter w/o reservations, but today the *Wheel of Fortune
was turning in their favor.  After *Trouble with Harry (he had been
in favor of the policy *Say It With Bullets) and an incident locally
referred to as *The Say Uncle Affair, which the owners would not 
explain, they were allowed to go on in and watch the cook cut the meat.  
He was so fast he was on a *Chopping Spree.  "I'm so hungry," B.A. 
said, "I could eat the *Rabbit that Ate Las Vegas.   They ate and 
watched the show -- after the *Curtain Call they watched the *Dishpan
Man do his job and wash the dishes.  Later, he introduce himself by 
his nick name: *Duke of Whispering Pines.  After some *Semi-friendly
Persuasion, they left the woman in the Duke's care and finished their
vacation.  On their way out of town, little kids would follow them 
around call the only English phrase they knew, "*When You Coming Back,
 Range Rider?"  (Range Rider was what these kids called Americans.)
         They relaxed doing *Mind Games, playing football and 
inventing new *Quarterback Sneaks and taking *Mexican Slay Rides.
Face thought about all the *Bullets and Bikinis that he had seen 
because of their missions.  Asleep on the shore of the lake, B.A. dreamt 
about driving around with his uncle and telling him, "*Uncle Buckle-Up."
Murdock sat and wrote a new Humphry Bogart script: "*The Maltese Cow."  
Although Sparks and the rest were content to relax and enjoy the break,
Hannibal was restless and in need of jazz, of excitement.  At one point
he looked up at the volcano that had formed this tropical island and 
called in frustration at the quiet, "*Where’s the Monster When You Need
Him?"   All too soon for the rest, it was time to return to work, to 
step up to the *Firing Line, back to stopping *Taxi-Cab Wars and other
such problems that escaped the attention of abilities of local 

By Dawn (Thunderbird) Underwood

*=episode title
Once apon a time, in a land far, far away lived a woman named 
Sparks.  Now one day, Sparks was taking a walk.  While walking 
she came upon a *bend in the river she'd been following.  At this 
bend was a shallow area, so Sparks decided to cross the river.  
As she was crossing the river, a giant rabbit called to her 
from the other bank.  "Stop where you are or I will have to eat 
you!" he called.
"Eat me?  Why?  Who are you?" she asked, up to her waist in 
water.  There was *water, water everywhere and she knew getting 
to the other side was going to be *harder than it looked.
"I'm the *rabbit who ate Las Vegas," he boasted, "and you look 
like you'll make a good snack!"

Frightened, Sparks did not know what to do.  All of a sudden 
she heard a cry of, "*The A-Team is coming, the A-Team is coming!" 
and saw a man in a blue baseball cap swinging through the trees 
on a vine. (You know, kinda like George of the Jungle?)

In order to save their *skins, Face, a friend of the man who swung 
through the trees, whipped up a *recipe for heavy bread.  The 
rabbit, who was a *beast from the belly of a boeing, sank in the river.

*Without reservations, the Team, with Sparks in tow, headed for 
*the island where there was a joyful *family reunion with Sparks 
and her green daughter, *Timber.  In the distance, they could hear 
the peals of the *belles of St. Mary's and thought it might be *a 
nice place to visit.  But *trouble was brewing and they were *in 
plane sight of the bad guys.

Not knowing where to go, Hannibal passed out a plain *white ballot.
It was decided to grab a nearby jeep, but when the tires went flat, 
they had *trouble on wheels and the get away became a *mexican slayride.
The ride ended when the jeep crashed into a building housing *pros 
and cons and the fearless Team was having a *bad time on the border
of these two places until the *duke of whispering pines appeared 
out of nowhere.  After a *quarterback sneak and a *westcoast 
turnaround, both *deadly maneuvers, the Team and Sparks were safely
back for a *holliday in the hills.  They left *Timber on *the island 
with the little sailors and all the wild donkies because she was enjoying
herself so much.
        Now, what REALLY happened between Sparks and Murdock?  Well, we'll 
leave that for your imagination.


By Karen "Maydock" May

*=episode title
One day very recently, our good friend Sparks was having a *black day at Bad 
Rock. We, being her loyal & faithful friends & members of the NightHawk
Commandos, suggested a *holiday in the hills, which we thought would be a
really *nice place to visit. 

After having expressed our true inner feelings at *the only church in town,
we finally convinced Sparks to head out for a vacation where *there's always
a catch! I mean, after all those nasty thunderstorms she is so afraid of,
I'm sure quite often there is always *water, water everywhere. We told her to
head for Nevada - but *it's a desert out there. Well, this vacation was gonna
be *harder than it looks. 

We finally convinced her to just go up around the *bend in the river and look
up some friends of ours - *the sherrifs of Rivertown. 

Pat needed a new wardrobe - she chose some *hot styles & managed to *break out
of her everyday monotonous routine and, after downing a *cup a'joe or two,
became a wayward traveller and joined the other *knights of the road.

Ah, but soon there was *trouble brewing, as we had forgot all about the
*incident at Crystal Lake! Not to fear! To guard over our Sparks we decided
to send our bestest and hunkiest PILOT, H.M. Murdock!!! Together he & Sparks
were soon on the *road to hope and with the radio blarin' with the *heart of
rock 'n' roll, they began their *mission of peace, leaving behind the *sound
of thunder.

And there you have it, folks! Since we have not heard from them for a *family
reunion, we honestly believe that Sparks & Murdock have reached the *point of
no return.

Sparks & Murdock became very close, VERY quickly. They decided to leave this
Texan nightmare of thunderstorms & moved to a *little town with an accent.
Much to the dismay of the folks who lived there, whose attitude was "Well,
*there goes the neighborhood", and who felt their town should be for *members
only, Sparks & HM, being the *out-of-towners, decided to try a bit of
*semi-friendly persuasion in order to avoid a *showdown and to try and get along
with their new neighbors. 

Well folks, we weren't ready for a *curtain call to this relationship yet!
Although some people wanted to put the *big squeeze on our favorite duo,
making *moving targets out of them, well, it wasn't up to the town to deliver
a *judgment day. This little problem was NOT gonna stand in the way of the
happiness that our heros had found together! Moving into their new house,
well, a *lease with an option to die just wouldn't do! Nosireee!!!

One night while Sparks was watching *Wheel of Fortune, Murdock was *waiting
for insane Wayne, a close friend of his from his past. When Wayne arrived,
he felt that maybe a *small and deadly war would be the answer, but HM didn't
want to *say it with bullets. Murdock couldn't stand violence, and *beneath
the surface, he was a loving & devoted partner to Sparks, and amongst the
*blood, sweat & cheers decided that together they would face the *firing line
and beat this once & for all - *till death do us part! 

And so ensued a *Beverly Hills assault. Soon all the neighbors realized how
wonderful our heros were and decided to embark upon a *mission of peace!
Sparks was presented with a *recipe for heavy bread* from her now friendly
neighbors. HM was welcomed into the pack and soon became known as the *champ!
Insane Wayne retreated back to his home and took with him his *theory of

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