In your Dingwall slums,
You rake in your bucket for something to eat
You find a dead rat and you think it's a treat,
In your Dingwall slums
Let them know it's Christmas time,
Feed the Farmers,
Let them know it's Christmas time
Oh I'd rather be an Afghan than a tink,
Rather be an Afghan,
Rather be an Afghan,
Rather be an Afghan than a tink.
[to the tune of 'Coming Round the Mountain']
Neale Cooper in his barn ooh-arr, ooh-arr,
Neale Cooper in his barn, shagging sheep on his farm
Ooh-aar, ooh-arr aaaah
You've got to wear the Caley shirt and Caley tie,
You've got to wear the Caley bonnet,
With f*ck the COunty on it,
If you want to go to heaven when you die
[to the tune of 'Coming Round the Mountain']
OOh OOh
Who let the tinks out?
OOh OOh
[to the tune of 'Who let the Dogs OUt?']
Oh what can it mean,
To a soft Gypsy b*stard,
And a sh*te football team
[to the tune of 'Daydream Believer']
Someone came and asked me,
Who I was,
So I punched him,
Then I kicked him,
Now he's on the hospital,
On a life support machine,
oh-ooooh,
oh-ooooh,
oh-oooh oh Caley, Caley,
I'd walk a million miles,
For one of your goals,
Oh Caley,
Oh Caley,
I'd walk a million miles,
for one of your goals
Oh Caley
Oh oh caley
[First section is call and response]
