| V: Yes, but not now. The season finale of "Gil Iggan's Asteroid" is going to be on in a little while, and I'm probably going to miss it!
A: Ah. Well, you could always record it. V: *sighs* It's not the same... (Vader walks on.) A: Well, since you brought it up, here's the eternal question: Gin-Jurr or Ma'Reeann? V: Ma'Reeann. A: See, I'm a Gin-Jurr guy myself. V: Please. Gin-Jurr is a tramp. A: You say that like it's a bad thing. (Vader hops in a turbolift.) A: The thing that I can never understand is why the professor doesn't just fix the ship and get them off the asteroid. I mean, the guy can make a landspeeder out of toothpicks and mynock droppings, for crying out loud. V: I thought that would be obvious. He's intentionally keeping them on the asteroid. A: Really? V: Really. Frankly, I have to admire his sinister resolve. A: So, what brought you to that conclusion? V: Think about it. The professor was a scientist, so he probably wasn't doing too well with the ladies. A: So? V: So fate intervenes, and the professor suddenly finds himself shipwrecked on an asteroid with both Gin-Jurr and Ma'Reeann. And his only competition is a fat starship captain, an idiot first mate, and a middle-aged married man. The Professor's got it made! Of course he doesn't want to leave. A: But Mr. How-El is rich. That's gotta be pretty attractive. V: So? Credits don't mean a thing on that asteroid. The guy who can build a jacuzzi out of an old engine tube - that's the guy the chicks are going to flock to. A: But what about Gil Iggan? It's usually his wacky antics that keep them on the asteroid - not anything the Professor does. V: True. But I believe that some of Gil Iggan's ineptitude could be due to a post-hypnotic suggestion implanted by the professor, causing him to unconsciously sabotage any rescue efforts. A: Post-hypnotic suggestion. Really. V: Indeed. (Vader steps out of the turbolift and into a corridor. There he stops, waiting for Obi-Wan to show up.) A: You know, you've put way too much thought into this. V: That's nothing. You should hear my theories on "The Bray-Dee Bunch"... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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| ABOARD THE DEATH STAR:
(Near the docking bay holding the Millenium Falcon, Vader waits in a corridor, lightsaber lit.) ANAKIN: So the padawan says, "A statue of Dooku? I thought he said poodoo!" (pause) VADER: I don't get it. A: Well, see- (Just then, Obi-Wan comes around the corner, sees Vader, and activates his own lightsaber.) A: Wow, you were right. He was coming this way. V: Of course. Now I'll just step forward and spout something suitably menacing, yet mocking, and...uh-oh. A: Uh-oh? What's "uh-oh"? V: Brain freeze. A: You're kidding. V: I never kid. A: True... V: Help me out here. What do I say? home previous next |
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