A time comes in your life when you finally get it . . .
When in the midst of all your fears and insanity,
you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the
voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!
Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on.
And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum,
your sobs begin to subside; you shudder once or twice;
you blink back your tears. and through a mantle of wet lashes,
you begin to look at the world through new eyes.


~ THIS IS YOUR AWAKENING ~


You realize that it is time to stop hoping and waiting
for something to change or for happiness, safety and security
to come galloping over the next horizon.
You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming
and you are not Cinderella, and that in the real world,
there are not always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter),
and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you,
and in the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.



You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect,
and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve
of who or what you are . . . and that is OK.
(They are entitled to their own views and opinions.)
And you learn the importance of loving and championing
yourself, and in the process, a sense of new found confidence
is born of self-approval.



You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things
they did to you (or did not do for you),
and you learn that the only thing you can really count on
is the unexpected. You learn that people do not always say what
they mean, or mean what they say, and that not everyone will always
be there for you, and that it's not always about you.



So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself
and in the process, a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance.
You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people
as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties,
and in the process, a sense of peace & contentment is born of forgiveness.



You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you,
is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained
into your psyche. And you begin to sift through everything you have been fed
about how you should behave, how you should look and how much you should weigh,
what you should wear and where you should shop and what you should drive,
how and where you should live and what you should do for a living,
who you should sleep with, who you should marry and what you should expect
of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what you owe
your parents.



You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view.
And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are
and what you really stand for.
You learn the difference between wanting and needing
and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you have outgrown,
or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process,
you learn to go with your instincts.



You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive.
And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing
and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer"
looking for your next fix.



You learn that principles, such as honesty and integrity,
are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era
but the mortar that holds together the foundation
upon which you must build a life.



You learn that you do not know everything;
it is not your job to save the world and that you
cannot teach a pig to sing.



You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility
and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.



You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry
and that martyrs get burned at the stake.



Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love.
How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving
and when to walk away.



You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a
relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful,
more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man
on your arm or the child that bears your name.



You learn to look at relationships as they really are
and not as you would have them be.
You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.



You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love.
And you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms . . .
just to make you happy.



And you learn that alone does not mean lonely . . .
And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact
that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10
and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your
head and agonizing over how you "stack up."



You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside,
smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.
You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK . . .
and that it is your right to want things and to ask for
the things that you want . . . and that sometimes,
it is necessary to make demands.



You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated
with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect,
and you will not settle for less. And, you allow only the one
who cherishes you to glorify you with his touch
and, in the process, you internalize the meaning of self-respect.



And you learn that your body really is your temple.
And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect.
You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water,
and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue
diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear.
So you take more time to rest.
And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul.
So you take more time to laugh and to play.



You learn, that for the most part, in life
you get what you believe you deserve . . .
and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.



You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for
and that wishing for something to happen is different
from working toward making it happen.
More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success,
you need direction, discipline and perseverance.



You also learn that no one can do it all alone
and that it is OK to risk asking for help.
You learn that the only thing you must truly fear
is the great robber baron of all time.
FEAR itself.
You learn to step right into and through your fears
because you know that whatever happens,
you can handle it, and to give in to fear
is to give away the right to live life on your terms.



And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it
living under a cloud of impending doom.
You learn that life isn't always fair;
You don't always get what you think you deserve
and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting,
good people. On these occasions, you learn not to
personalize things. It is just life happening.



And you learn to deal with evil
in its most primal state -- the ego.
You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy,
and resentment must be understood and redirected
or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison
the universe that surrounds you.
You learn to admit when you are wrong
and to build bridges instead of walls.



You learn to be thankful and to take comfort
in many of the simple things we take for granted;
things that millions of people upon the earth can
only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water,
a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.



Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself, by yourself,
and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself
and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire.
And you hang a wind chime outside your window
so you can listen to the wind.
And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting,
and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.



Finally. . .
with courage in your heart and with good Friends by your side,
you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design
the life you want to live as best as you can.