|
|
|
There are only three things a
girl needs to survive in her life:
Love
that makes her weak in the knees,
Alcohol to emphasize her
fabulous life,
And friends to pick her up when
both make her hit the floor.
|
|
I don't like jail,
they've got the wrong kind of bars there
|
|
College is the
fountain of knowledge...
And students are
there to DRINK
|
|
Keep on partying
until the end! Go get fucked up with all of our friends!
And don't be
confused when the next morning they call you a whore
cause you don't know
what you did the night
before!
|
|
When your all
fucked up, piss faced drunk and throwing up,
Like a true
friend, I'll be right behind you filling your cup
|
|
Love ya lots like
tater tots... but not as much as vodka shots!
|
|
Sex, drugs, rock
'n roll! Speed, weed, birth control...
Drink tequila,
have a shot! Fuck a guy you think is hot...
Fuck the panties,
buy a thong! Party hard, and all night long...
Life's a bitch and
then you die! Fuck the world, lets all get high!
|
Dough, the stuff that buys me
beer.
Ray, the guy who brings me beer.
Me, the guy who drinks the beer.
Far, a long way to get beer.
So, I'll have another beer.
La, I'll have another beer.
Tea, no thanks I'm having beer.
That will bring us back to...DOH!!!I
|
|
I don't like jail
very much, It has the wrong kind of bars
|
|
I take a whiskey
drink
I take a chocolate
drink
and when I have to
pee
I use the kitchen
sink
|
|
People who drink
light "beer" don't like the taste of beer;
they just like to
pee a lot.
|
|
The worse you are
at thinking
The better you are
at drinking
|
|
Actually it only
takes me one drink to get drunk.
The trouble is I
can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth
|
24 hours in a day
24 cans in a case
Coincidence...
|
|
Everybody should believe in something
I believe I'll have another drink
|
|
If you resolve to
give up smoking, drinking and loving,
you don't actually
live longer; it just seems longer
|
|
Well
I've
drank,
I've stumbled, I've
loved till I fell
when the drunk part was
over,
love hurt me like hell
|
|
I'll drink you
pretty if you're buying
|
Good friends will be there to take your drink away
from you when they think you've had enough...
Best friends will look at you stumbling all over the
place and say "bitch drink the rest of that...!
you
know we don't waste that shit!"
|
You
can always retake the class... but you cant relive the party
|
There are only two absolutes in life
Friends and Vodka
And
the best times usually involve both
|
Sometimes you just have to kick back and party
When life gets tough, break out the Bacardi!
|
Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.
|
|
Good friends get drunk with you
Best friends hold your hair back when you've had to many
|
|
I
may be drunk, but you are down right ugly,
and
I shall be sober in the morning...
|
|
Prevent hangovers... Stay drunk!
|
Livin' it up and always causing trouble
Our nights don't end till we seeing double
|
|
Drink triple, see double, act single.
|
|
Two
hands and just one mouth... now THAT'S a drinking problem!
|
|
Alcohol isn't the answer, But it sure as hell makes you forget the question!!
|
|
WARNING: Consumption of
alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers
are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.
|
|
WARNING: Alcohol may
cause you to roll over in the
morning and see something really scary
|
|
WARNING: Consumption of
alcohol may leave you wondering
what
the hell happened to your pants
|
|
There are two types of great parties,
the
ones you'll never forget and the kind you cant remember.
|
|
Beer... helping white
people dance since 1837
|
|
Beer... getting ugly
people laid since 1700
|
|
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy.
But the Bible says love your enemy.
|
|
Life's a waste of time, time's a waste of life so ...
let's all get wasted and have the time of our life
|
May
you...
Work like you don't need the money,
love like you've never been hurt,
dance like no-one is watching,
screw like it's being filmed,
and drink like a true Irishman.
|
Now
I lay me down to sleep,
A bottle of vodka at my feet,
If I die before I wake
Tell my girls I drank it straight
|
|
Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
|
|
I
drink to make other people interesting
|
|
Remember
"I" before "E", except in Budweiser
|
|
A
drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts.
|
|
Drink what you want, drink what you're able.
If
you are drinking with me, you'll be under the table
|
|
He who
laughs last, hasn't passed out yet
|
|
I
feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the
morning and
that's the best they're going to feel all day
|
|
I
distrust camels, and anyone else who can go for a week without a drink
|
Candy is dandy
But liquor is quicker.
|
|
If Drama were beer our whole school would be wasted.
|
|
One
reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time
|
|
Buy
me another drink, because your still ugly
|
|
If
the ocean were liquor and I was a duck,
I'd
swim to the bottom and drink my way up,
But
the oceans not liquor, and I'm not a duck,
So
pour me a shot and lets get fucked up!!
|
|
If
the ocean were vodka and I were a duck
Id
swim to the bottom and never come up
But
since it ain't vodka and I ain't a duck
Just
pass me the bottle and shut the fuck up
|
Drinking
Quotes