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| Mostly Funny Quotes 21 |
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| Stuff |
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| There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. --Will Rogers I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it. --George Bernard Shaw The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact than a drunken man is happier than a sober one. --George Bernard Shaw There ain't no answer. There ain't gonna be any answer. There never has been an answer. There's the answer. -- Gertrude Stein In the fight between you and the world, back the world. --Franz Kafka The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time. -- Leo Kennedy There are three sides to every story - yours, mine, and all that lie between. --Jody Kern Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel across the country from coast to coast without seeing anything. -- Charles Kuralt "Men don't care what's on TV. They care about what else is on TV." - Jerry Seinfeld Hollywood is the only place you can wake up in the morning and hear the birds coughing in the trees. ---Joe Frisco "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will always be yours. If it doesn't come back it was never yours to begin with. But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't appear to realize that you had set it free, you're probably related to it." - Chris Champagne "If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work." --Ogden Nash "Some see the glass as half-empty, some see the glass as half-full. I see the glass as too big." -- George Carlin "And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people, don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people, don't blame everything on Satan." * George Burns Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face. ~Dave Barry |