This is my last journal entry as a pre-op!!  WHOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I can't believe surgery is in THREE DAYS!  I wanted to write this so I can document how I'm feeling now, as a pre-op.  I am feeling every emotion under the sun right now.  I'm scared, happy, anxious, excited, you name it...I'm feeling it.  In three days my life will change forever, and I can't WAIT!  It's been almost a year since I first submitted my paperwork to Weight For Life.  And now, I'm almost on the other side.  I can't wait to experience the energy my post op friends have.  To experience the quality of life they now have.  I'm greatful every day for Spotlight Health and the support and love I get from them.  I'm thankful for team Chi-Town and their love & support as well.  And the group from Alexian Brothers, who I see once a month at the obesity seminars.  Without God, my family, and my friends...I would NEVER have made it this far.  I have a second chance at life.  A life without diabetes and high blood pressure.  A life with less pain than I have every day now.  I can only imagine my life after surgery right now...but in three days I will understand more.  I'm very blessed.  My husband, Michael is down 137 as of last saturday.  He is a real inspiration.  And to see the pictures of the people who had surgery already...it's amazing.  I was able to have dinner Thursday night with Sheila & Kathy from team Chi Town.  We had a great time and got some good before pix of me.  I'm gonna take a lot more before pix, tho...I want a good record of what I'll never look like again.  I look at pictures I took when I did Jenny Craig back in the early 90's, and I was 220, but I was not in pain, and I thought I looked pretty good.  The only difference is I won't gain 100+ lbs back with this surgery.  I'm gonna have the distal...I'm still foggy on what that is, but I will also have it done LAP.  I don't yet know the results of my ultrasound on my liver, kidneys & gallbladder...so I don't yet know if my gallbladder will be staying or going.  My nerves are going bezerk!  I actually threw away half of my candy bar yesterday, because it didn't taste good.  I had one of those huge 100grand bars that you buy for fund raising for a buck, and I ate the first cube, and it tasted funny...then I put the other 1/2 in my drawer.  I had a diet coke from Wendy's, which I took two sips of and THAT tasted horrible, so I tossed that and got water, which tasted SOOOO much better!  So about an hour later, I went to take a bite of the second cube of the candy bar, and it tasted HORRIBLE!!!!  So I spat out the bite in my mouth & tossed the rest of the candy bar.  Good riddens!  I didn't need it anyway.  But I'm having trouble staying out of the bathroom.  The diarreah is dreadful!  I had lost 5lbs when I weighed in at Dr. Hart's office...and I wonder if it's because I haven't felt like eating and I've been in the bathroom all the time.  Hmmm........I dunno.  At any rate, at least I'm not gaining.  I'm trying to deal now with the loss of my best friend...food.  I know that it's not that I wont' be able to have anything good ever again...that's not the way to look at it.  I see it as, I won't be able to have a lot of the bad stuff that made me MO anymore.  I won't be able to eat crap anymore, which is great!  I am SO ready for this!  SO READY!  COME ON, TUESDAY!  WHOOHOO!!!!!!!  My surgery is at 3:30pm, so I'll be sleeping late...lol.  But I'll be more than ready to start my new life.  And it's only fitting that I have this surgery at Alexian Brothers.  I was born there on August 3, 1970, and I will be "reborn" there on April 29, 2003.