Hawkeye had been on Post Op duty since 12pm, it was now 5:55 and had not seen Margaret since he started. He’d decided to skip lunch when Lisa informed him it was green stuff with 1941 surplus purple beef-like substance, what he wouldn’t give for fresh fried lobster. The day had been pretty quiet. Most of the wounded from the deluge that the past week had been, were shipped off to the 121st EVAC, still most of the beds were taken. One kid had woken up screaming and kicking. Hawkeye calmed him down and talked with him about what was wrong (Ha – if anyone couldn’t guess what it was in the first place). The kid had lied about his age and had seen his two buddies blown up, right in front of him. Hawkeye immediately signed his discharge papers and the kid would be home within a week, not before he had someone see him.
He was talking with Samantha about a patient’s sudden raise in temperature, when Margaret walked in, still dressed in the same minimal amount, as she was when he left her earlier that day. He wasn’t sure if he should kiss her, hug her, or just talk. Margaret walked up to him with a smile. “Thanks Sam, hey Mags!” “Hey Hawk” Margaret just gives him a quick peck on the lips…No matter how much of a rebel she was…she always remained the professional in OR and Post Op. “Is that all I get for not seeing you for 6 hours?” “Sorry about that, I do have a job if you may recall,” “And it’s not just you and me in” “Hawkeye, watch your tongue or I’ll bite it off” “That may just be the best thing to happen all day” “It hasn’t been that bad has it?” “If you don’t count a very distraught underage kid who’s seen more death then he should ever have to, and the private over there having a temperature record of 104 degrees, then no, it hasn’t been that bad.”
“You sound like you need a break” “I couldn’t agree more, but I gotta wait till Frank gets here.” “Don’t mention that creep” “Why, what’s he done now?” “Just more of the same crap, ‘Major, would you like a drink? Major can I join you for lunch, Major, why do you hang around with degenerates like Pierce and McIntyre?’ That last one really pissed me off.” “Well, he’ll get his just desserts. Remember: Karma always comes back to bite you in the ass.” Margaret nodded her head in agreement and laughed. Hawkeye after thinking about what he’d said also joined in. “So uh, did you wanna do something tonight?” Hawkeye hoping it was the same kind of ‘something’ that he had in mind. “I know where you’re headed…no, actually we need to talk.” “We? What about?” “And Trapper…you two just need to sort stuff out.” “Margaret, me and Trapper are fine we…” “No you’re not” Margaret half snorts out. “Believe me Hawk, we need to talk. If I didn’t think it wasn’t important, I wouldn’t bring it up.” Hawkeye didn’t really want to bring up the past…but if Margaret wanted him to.
“Fine, you win” Margaret wraps her arms around his neck “I always do!” And gives him a short, but sweet kiss. “What’s there to eat?” “I’d rather not say…even the thought of it makes me sick.” “From what Lisa told me about lunch I’d agree.” Hawkeye picks up a chart he’d been working on since early in his shift…the writing was atrocious, and none of the nurses could decipher what gibberish language it was written in. “Hey Mags, who’s writing is this? I can’t decipher if it’s Russian or Martian.” “That’s MINE you idiot” Margaret gives a smirk and takes the chart off him. “Oh, it’s Houlihan then? You know, you should be a doctor, handwriting’s certainly bad enough.” “Oh knock it off – see here it clearly says 20 milligrams” “I thought it said microseconds” piped up Lisa. “Not, defiantly millipedes” added Samantha. “And I suspected micrometres.” “Oh shut up.” The other 3 just laugh at it.
Just then Frank walks in, keeping his anally-retentive-military style at all times, calmly says to Hawkeye “Pierce, I am here to relieve you.” “You do resemble an enema.” Which in turn, gets all 5 nurses (as Janet and Maria have just come in) and a few of the surrounding conscious patients laughing in hysterics. Being in a war, even the lamest of all jokes gets people laughing, relieving much stress. “Pierce, I am a superior officer and I demand the respect that goes with it.” “Ah go stuff it Burns.” Was all Hawkeye said, not bothered to think about it. Frank was fuming, but still kept his cool. “Ah Major…I wondered if we could talk privately?” Margaret was sick of his constant come-ons and silently pleaded with Hawkeye to wait. “If it’s about work, yes…if it’s about getting me in bed with you…FORGET IT!” Frank was left gob-smacked as Hawkeye doubled over in pain from laughing so hard. “Are you coming Hawk?” He couldn’t move though…what Margaret had just said was an award winning line.
Hawkeye finally managed to walk out the door and over to the Swamp. “I…I’m sorry Mags, but that was just…” He couldn’t finish his sentence as another fit of laughter came over him. Margaret managed to pull him into the Swamp and onto the nearest cot. Unfortunately for her, the closest one was hers, she had pulled him in the wrong way and she was stuck under him. “You can get off me now.” “Or what?” Hawkeye was pressing himself down more. “Or…I may refuse another performance of last night.” This quietened his laughing fit.
“You wouldn’t dare…you enjoyed it too much.” “Oh wouldn’t I? If you may recall, we have another bunkmate who might be just as happy to have me as you are.” “Oh, you wanna play do you?” Remembering what she had said to him last night, Hawkeye began to tickle her again. “Oh God Hawkeye…pleeeease don’t. STOP IT!” “You know, that sounds awfully familiar.” “You are such a…” Hawkeye shuts her up and captures her mouth with his.
Hawkeye’s hands went to her neck as he began to undo her top when “Hawk…Hawk, not now.” “Hmmm, why not?” “Because, we have to talk with Trapper…he heard us last night…” “WHAT?” ”And there’s stuff both of you should know” “Why can’t you just tell me?” “Because it’s not my right to. It would be better to hear it from him.” Hawkeye leaned back a bit, but stayed sitting on the bed. “Now?”
As if on cue, Trapper walks into the Swamp, knowing that Margaret wanted them all to talk. “Speak of the devil” Hawkeye didn’t want to do this, but if Margaret wanted to, he’d have no choice.
“Hey Trapp, wanna drink?” “What have you got?” “Nothing much…the still’s still not up” Margaret didn’t know why not. “We just need a copper coil and something to strain it through” “I’ll go see Zale…he should have something” Margaret volunteered and jumped up and ran out the door. ‘Why did she leave us alone?’ Hawkeye’s familiar uncomfortable feeling came back and he found the whole situation very unnerving. “So uh…how was your day Trapp?” Trapper was still angry about last night and wasn’t feeling all that chummy. “Nothing compared to yours probably” “Yeah, one kid was only 16 and another’s temp is at 104” “You left him alone with Frank?” “I had Maria tell Henry.” “Oh” Trapper didn’t feel comfortable. “Do you know Margaret wants us to talk?” Hawkeye was struggling at trying to break the ice. “Yeah…d’you know what about?”
Hawkeye wasn’t sure how to answer this. “I think I have an idea…I know you heard. . . last night” “Look Hawk, I” “I know that’s why you’re pissed at me too. . . I can sense you feel something for her.” “I do Hawk” “What about Louise and. . . ” “Louise and I aren’t together anymore” “WHAT, Why?” “We’re just too different.” Hawkeye stood up and started pacing. “DAMN,” he cursed, throwing a pillow. “I knew this would happen.” “Hawk, this had nothing to do with you, us. Louise never and would never find out. She’s intelligent, but not too bright about what’s happening around her. I guess that’s why she has that temper.” Hawkeye was somewhat relieved by this, but that soon turned into concern about why he was relieved. ‘Where could Margaret be’ they both simultaneously thought. “So what did she want to talk about?” Trapper asked again.
Just then Margaret barges through the door cursing “ That idiot sergeant, how hard is it to find a damn copper coil?” “What’s the problem?” asks Trapper. “Zale. Says he can’t get a coil” “Why?” inquires Hawkeye. “I’m still trying to figure that myself.” “Margaret, just go talk to the motor pool, they should have something,” being a native Bostonian, Trapper knew all about cars. “Or we could just throw money into a wishing well and hope for the best,” Hawkeye added sceptically. “I did manage to find some spare fatigues to strain it through.” “Great!” Hawkeye was really excited about this; he’d only ever made one before, which turned out to be a complete disaster. Between his surgical capabilities, Trapper’s knowledge of all things mechanical and Margaret’s ability to follow directions – wanting or no, they should have it up and running by tomorrow morning.
An awkward silence filled the air for several minutes whilst they all tried to figure what to say.
“You wanted to talk Margaret?” Trapper bravely putting his 2 cents worth in first. Margaret just stands up and locks the door. “We’re not going anywhere Mags” Hawkeye was nervous; you could tell when his jokes became lamer. “Privacy.” “And we’re here why?” Hawkeye was getting increasingly angrier by the second. “Last night” “Then why the hell am I here?” Jumping to conclusions never helped anyone. “No. . .what I meant was when you two had me pinned down. . .what the hell was that?” “What the hell was what? It was fun. . .you enjoyed it” “Yeah, but what if Henry and Frank didn’t barge in huh? What would have happened then? You can’t exactly say that was nothing!” “Yes you can. . .” “No Hawk, you can’t” Trapper found his voice. . .”Margaret’s right, what woulda happened?” “Nothing” “You call nearly three years NOTHING?” “Don’t lay that shit on me.” “Cut it OUT! Geeze one talk and you try to kill each other.” Hawkeye regained composure and started talking “I never said it was nothing. . .I never actually said enough.”
‘What did he just say?’ Trapper replayed it over in his head. . .yep, he said that. “I meant what I said 6 months ago, leaving you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. More than when Carlye left.” “Then why Hawk, why?” “I did what I thought was best. . .but I was wrong.”
Hawkeye walks over and sits beside Trapper. “I…I never told you the truth. I know you loved me” Trapper interrupts him. “No…loves.” “What?” “I still love you Hawk, always have.” Hawkeye sat there, gob-smacked. “Hawk?” Trapper was a little worried when he didn’t answer. “Hawkeye?” Trapper said again. . .”Maggie?” Margaret stayed silent…she knew how tough this was for him. “Hawkeye?” Trapper touched his hand, hoping that he would come around. “What? Oh right. “I never told you the truth Trapp.” “About what? That you’re really still in Maine and I’m imagining all this?” “Believe me, this is no dream. I’m here. It’s me. . .it’s you. . .it’s us.” “Us?” “When I broke. . .everything off. . .you gotta understand that. . .”
Hawkeye wasn’t sure how to put it. How do you tell a guy you haven’t seen in six months that you’re in love with him? “That was the hardest thing I ever had to do.” Trapper took his hands in his “Then why?” “Because of Louise. . .of the girls. I couldn’t take being friends with you, having fun with your family, then going home and being more than that. I said, you needed to choose and I didn’t give you the option.“ ”But you should have Hawk.” “No. . .and I didn’t” he paused. “And I’ve regretted every minute of it.” This surprised Trapper who was expecting an ‘it was the right thing to do’ lecture. “Come again?” “I never told you this and I’ve agonised over it for the past 6 months.” “Over what?” “You gotta remember that you had a girlfriend and 2 kids and nothing could come of it anymore…I mean what would happen if they found out? Would it start world war three? Would you climb up a tree and hide for eternity? Would they cry? Would they laugh? Would they hire a hit man?” “Hawk. . .HAWK. You’re babbling.” “Oh right. What I’m trying to say is. . .breaking up with you was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. The reason for it is because” ‘Okay Hawk, just say it and everything’ll be just dandy’ “. . .Is because I love you Trapper. I always have.”
You thought Trapper was speechless before. . .try now. You could hear a pin drop. Trapper did the only thing he thought he could. . .stood up and pulled Hawkeye into a bear hug. “God I’ve missed you Trapp.” Hawkeye was nearly in tears. How could one person do so much to him? One person? No. . .Two. TWO! He remembered Margaret who also was close to tears. “Me too Hawk.” Trapper was grinning from ear to ear. . .his life was happy again. . .Well almost. “Was that it Maggie?” He didn’t care how corny or silly he sounded, he was happy. “Not quite” Margaret was trying to keep the tears from flowing. “Hwy what’s wrong?” “You’re a hero Maggie!” “Then why do I feel left out?” “What? Why?” “I’m happy that you two are finally out with it, really. I just wanna know where you two lie. . .so to speak” Margaret couldn’t help but add that last bit in. But before they could answer came ‘Attention, incoming wounded. . .only good thing about this is the lack of mess tent.’
“Maggie we’ll talk later alright?” “You won’t be left alone again. . .I promise” “I know guys. Lets get to it!”
In OR a few hours later
“Sci…issors” “Scissors” “Hawk you seem tired, get some sleep after this.” “It’s probably from all that ruckus you caused this week Pierce.” “Put a sock in it needle nose!” Margaret was just about ready to kill Frank. “Boy is he an asshole” she said quietly to herself. “You can say that again Mags.” Apparently not quiet enough. “How many more Klinger.” A man wearing a red evening gown, with heels and all came over to the young curly-headed captain. “A couple more. . .we had our deluge for the week.”
“Kellye, would you close for me?” “Yes doctor” “Go on home Hawk, we’ll get the rest.” “No, he’ll get the rest while we get the wounded.” Groans came from all who were tired and believed that to be the worst attempt at a joke. It was so lame that it wasn’t good enough to be called that! “Nah. . .I got some (yawn) stuff to do.” “Like what?” “Like checking that old butter fingers there doesn’t screw up another operation that’s what.” “I resent that” “And WE resent you MAjor” Margaret was on the warpath. “Look before we start the next war, how about we all calm down and finish up here.” “Done and done! Noooext body please!”
Trapper wanted to finish this so he could begin. . .whatever it was that was going through his mind. . .how should I know what?. . .I’m just the author!
“No Frank, you exteriorise that. . .everyone knows that you idiot, even the patients. . .or infants as they are.” “Colonel, I will not put up with this man’s abuse!” “Alright CALM DOWN EVERYONE, JUST KEEP IT CALM!” Henry composed himself before continuing. “Frank, when you learn to be a doctor, Pierce will stop telling you how to work – right Pierce?” “Sure, you got no argument out of me. . .but until he learns how to operate.” “Fine Pierce. . .whatever.” “Humph!” “Ah Frank, I don’t think this is the time for you to hear this. . .but you’ve stitched your gloves together.”
Half an hour and 2 minor complications later
“But Cooooolonel!” “Frank, one more complaint and I’ll put in a complaint about your complaints got that!” Frank just stormed off angrily towards his tent. “Well shall we repair to the tent” “I didn’t know it was “broken”” they all added in with a laugh. “Night Henry!” they all chimed in.
In the Swamp they saw before them a sight that they would remember forever. . .”THE COIL!” Shouted Hawkeye, as he jumped up and down like a little schoolboy. “But how. . .?” Trapper was confused. “Dear guys, heard you needed this and ‘borrowed’ one from the motor pool. Radar.” Margaret was too anxious to be excited. “So. . .where do we lie?” “Here and there” Hawkeye pointed to their respective bunks. “You’re a funny, funny guy.” “I like to think so.” “I know you do.” “GUYS!” “Hmmm?” Both were too. . .something to know what was happening. “Be serious, what are you two gonna do? Are you together, are you apart, are you what?” “Jesus you get straight to the darn point.” “What do you want us to say Mags?” “I just don’t want to be left out. . .last night just wasn’t a quick roll in the sack ya know. . .least not for me.” Trapper was still a little uneasy about this. “And lets not forget this morning TRAPPER” “This morning? What this morning?” “how could I. . .you sure didn’t get the name Hotlips for nothing!” “WHAT! Where did you hear about that?” “Ah now if we tell you that Maggie. . .we’d have to kill you.” “Or lock you up and make you our slave.” “That doesn’t sound too bad of an idea!” “No it doesn’t.” “Not one bit.” The three of them had an evil smile on their faces.
“You’ve had something planned all along didn’t you Mags?” Both Hawkeye and Trapper were anxious to know what was happening. “Shhhhh” Margaret wrapped an arm around each of them, as Hawkeye and Trapper both put a hand on either cheek, and asked “Should we?” “Hell yes” they both answered.
Soon a frenzy of kissing, touching and the discarding of clothes filled the tent as each person began to explore and re-explore one another.
Margaret lets out a moan at the touch of their hands. She was thoroughly enjoying this. Lorraine…Lorraine who? All the worries of that week went flying out of her mind.
“You sure?” “Just do it!” “Mmm…”
The three let each others’ bodies bump and slide along the others’, not caring what happened, or who it was. To them this was paradise. To Hawkeye and Trapper – a totally new experience neither wanted to end. To Margaret – every woman’s dream was coming true…and loving her partners added to the enjoyment and pleasure.
Hours later, as all three climaxed and sigh of relief and joy came out, the three of them collapsed onto one of the beds, clinging onto each other in fear of falling off.
“Holy Shit.” Margaret said with a gasp. “Mmm” The boys added their sentiment. “This gonna last?” “Will it last? Of course!” “Not meaning to be crude…what am I saying? I don’t think I can go back to a one man show…that was soooooooo good!” “Mmm, sure was different.” “You can say that again.” “Sure was…” Trapper silenced him with a hungry kiss. “And also the sight of two guys kissing really turns me on.” “And the sight of more than that?” “Makes me want to join in.” “Well I think you succeeded in that Mags.” “How is this gonna work?” “Easy – any three of us screws whoever we want to - If one is away or Margaret’s…indisposed.” “There’s no way in hell you two are getting any with me when I’m…indisposed.” “Yeah, too messy.” “But we don’t leave anyone out.” “Unless there’s some alone time needed?” “Uh huh. So it’s agreed?” “Only if we can seal with more than a spoken word.” “I like your thinking!”
And the three…somehow kiss.
How it’s done? – I leave that up to you!
“Romance for three – can it be done?” “HELL YES!” the three yelled and laughed.
