- Over and Over Again
- Lets Get Retarded
- Nobody's Home
A mouse was sitting in a bar having a drink when a beautiful giraffe came in and sat down at the end of the bar. The mouse looked over at her and ordered her a drink. Soon he had moved down beside her and ordered her another drink. After a third round, the bartender looked up and they were leaving the bar together. The next day the mouse limped into the bar, barely crawled up on the barstool and sat there gasping for air. His whiskers were bent and broken, tail was crooked and patches of hair were falling out.
The bartender took one look and said, “How did it go last night?”
The mouse said, “Man, that was the best sex I ever had.”
The bartender asked, “Why do you look so bad?”
The mouse replied, “Hey between the kissing and the screwing I must have run 10 miles!”
School's going better, and Im now 'recovered' from whatever it is I had. Noone still knows, the doctor still didnt have a clue. I did something on the internet, just to give you a better prespective on how ... disgustingly easy it is for girls to get a guy on the internet, and how disturbingly desperate guy's appear to be through the internet. Im still researching, so the link will be up sometime this week.
Mcfly
So Im ill. And a weird sort of ill. At the end of the day, my face suddenly broke out in some horrible rash, and it has yet to go away. So yesterday night, I went to the emergency hospital. I was told to take a number. 7 hours later, I was told it would still be a few hours more. Angry and fustrated, I stormed home, and wrote this:
Fuick ottawas health care system.
My mom gets home at like 10 in the fucking afternoon, its 10pm now. Im on my fucking compiuter, and she fucking says helloo, and then fucking goes to fuck,ing bed. So I fucking go to the fcuking bathroom two fucking hours later, and fuck! I fucking have this red rash over my fucking forehead, which is fucking retarded cause I never did a fucking thing to deserve this fucking fate. So My mom fucking calls the emerg, and they tell me its best to go fucking down, so I do. I get tehre for fucking 11 fucking 30, and take a fucking number. at fucking 6 oh fucking clock, I finally get fucking pissed, near 7 hour slater. I fucking say "Why the FUCK have I been waiting for so fucking long, and how much longer must I fucking wait?" And they say "Well little fuck up, you fucking have been waiting as loing as I fgucking made you wait, so fucking take your number, and fucking wait two more fucking hours, at fucking least." So I fucking give her the fucking finger, and storm the fuck off. Call my fucking mom, and walk the fuck home. FUcking long walk if you ask me, its a fucking pitty OTTAWAS HEALTH system sucks so fucking bad. So now, Its 7 fucking hours later by the time I get home, 8 fucking hours later since I left, and fucking 9 fucking hours since I found out I had this red face. Now I cant fucking go to school lookin glike a fgucked up fucking santa clause, so I fucking have to stay home, yet I fucking need to go to fucking school tomorrow, its improtant, yet how the fuck can I? So I still have to fucking ot to that fucking emergency,. STiLL, and wait more fuckihng hours,. and I ant got ot fucking work,, yet I fucking have to go to fucking both. School, Work,, and that fucking emerg.
Fuck ottawas health care syustem. Who the fuck should wiat 7 hours to get told that they have to wait 2 more hours? And fucking get npothing out of it.
FUCK YOU.
So after writing this, I sit around staying up because I have school in a few hours. Stupid really, I end up falling asleep and not going to school at all. Or work later on. It wasnt a great day. I went to a walk-in-clinic earlier today, and was told that what I have, does not exist. So they need to run tests. Which, is kind of weird, because it does exist. Maybe their little 'Tests' will show them what morons they are. Well, not morons, just, not bright people.
No updates today, except for the constant flow of pics, and the new jokes. If you have any concerns, let me know. Oh, and sorry about the swearing. I was a little angry.
Mcfly
A man sees a snail on his doorstep, picks it up, and heaves it over his house.
Two years pass, and the guy sees the snail back at his door. It looks up and says, “What the fuck did you do that for?”
These two guys, Bill and Ted, went out hunting moose, but after three days they had come up with nothing. So, like any self-respecting hunters, they decided to outwit their prey.
On the next trip they brought along a moose costume and some artificial female moose mating scent. They sprayed the scent all around the trees at the edge of a clearing and quickly climbed into the costume, Bill in the front and Ted in the back.
After a few minutes a huge bull moose came running toward them from the trees. Bill screamed at Ted, “We’ve got a big one coming up, hand me the rifle.”
Ted screams back, “I thought you had the rifle, what are we gonna do?”
Bill calmly replies, “Well I’m gonna eat some grass, but you’d better brace yourself.”
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