2002 was a more difficult year. Hardware failures caused expense and considerable loss of time, rebuilding the computer and reinstalling software. Jennifer and I had broken up, with all the emotional upheaval that goes with something like that. I was increasingly frustrated by criticisms that were more related to differences in soundcards than to music. Work and other projects demanded an ever-incxreasing slice of time as well. One of those "other projects" was a more serious investigation of the requirements for putting out my own CDs of original material. The webmaster of the site that was hosting my compositions was increasingly hard to reach and slow at posting new tunes, due to his own work & personal situations - late 2001 was when I first began designing this website, and a considerable part of the content (like these "mini-diaries" that summarize the circumstances under which the music on each page was created) were first drafted then. And creatively, I still felt burned out to some extent, and in need of a break, or some fresh source of inspiration. In the meantime, I began focussing more on quality than on quick results. All of these factors combined to produce a marked downturn in my productivity for the year - as can be observed from the shortage of pages in this section! I still managed to complete an average of 2 tunes a week, or thereabouts, despite being forced to devote 95% of my time elsewhere; once you are bitten by the creativity bug, it's a hard monkey to get off your back. For all intents and purposes, this was a continuation of Period IX of my composing. It was a year in which there were three big bursts of creativity and little in between. This first was in March & April, and it accounts for songs #132-137; the second was June & July, which produced #s 138-144, spanning both this page and the start of the next. # Name (Length) Size Download Links Comments       131 Bon Vivant (8:38) 147K This was originally titled "Joye de Vivre" but when it was finished I realised that it more correctly expressed not the feeling, but a person who always felt that way - someone full of energy, full of life. It's a great piece of uptempo pop. It also sounds just pretty good on the SB-Live - the drums need a minor tweak but that's about it. 132 Be True To Yourself (3:13) 52K Another pop tune with a somewhat heavier beat. I saw a TV programme which suggested that people were increasingly hiding behind a veneer of masks, showing a false face to the world in the belief that it would help them to get ahead - get the job, get the promotion, whatever - by pretending to be exactly what they thought was wanted. The counterarguement in the debate suggested that this could make you seem phony, and that if your disguise was ever penetrated, it could have a lasting negative effect on your life. Personally, I despise Yes-men, people whose primary function is to agree with the authority figure in closest earshot; and the first arguement seemed to me to encompass the defence of the practice - so I wrote this piece in support of the counterarguement. 133 The Momentum Symphony (14:43) 161K This took absolutely forever to finish. I mean, something on the order of 14 months, a frsutratingly-small little bit at a time. As a result, it's hard for me to be objective about it to this day. The concept was a piece that "accellerated" without changing tempo, just rythm, melody, and key. It sounds great on the SB-Live, only slightly removed from the original verson. It's probably deserving of a berth in the favorites, I suppose - despite one bridge that still makes me cringe. 134 Love Forever (for Jo & Richie) (3:37) 38K Jo is my cousin, who I have known since she was knee-high to a duck. This was written to commemorate their wedding. She and Richie were so very clearly and obviously in Love with each other, that it made capturing their feelings easy. One of my all-time favorites - I would extend the length of the list before I let it escape. Another wonderfully upbeat piece, it doesn't quite work as well on the SB-Live, but I'm not sure that there's a whole lot that can be done to change that - it's the instruments themselves that are the problem. 135 Thumper (2:37) 61K This was all about the beat - thunderous, thumping, pounding even. It sounds almost exactly the same on the SB-Live as it did on the original Awe-32 - good, but not quite good enough. Some nice bits, though. 136 Apollo Pad 34 (4:39) 44K The launch pad where the Apollo 1 fire took place is now a rusting monument, abandoned and forgotten. It was never used again after the tragedy. This piece was inspired by the saying, "If these walls could talk" - I wanted to try and capture the story that Apollo Pad 34 would tell, if it could. It came out as yet another piece of upbeat pop music, dwelling more on the enthusiasm in the Space Programme at the time. Parts of this tune work just as well, if not better, on the SB-Live relative to the Awe-32; other parts work not quite as effectively. Trying to fix those without harming the former would be a real uphill battle, so I'll probably have to compromise somewhat on any remix. 137 dataStream (5:15) 131K Modern Telecommunications bathes us in a sea of data. And if we're not careful, our web browsers can get swept away by the currents, and carried down the dataStream. This is more of a hard-rock synth-bsed piece than straight pop. It sounds strange but reasonably satisfactory on the SB-Live. 138 Love Letters By E-Mail (2:37) 37K This was crafted from discarded pieces created for dataStream. Midtempo, upbeat and downbeat at the same time, it comes close but never quite gets it right. The subject was examining the impersonal nature of a form of communication increasingly used for very personal communictaions, and how the medium of expression influances the content, however subconsciously. It sounds fairly good on the SB-Live. 139 Spindizzy (2:45) 47K Named for the device used in a James Blish novel to permit cities to fly into orbit, this actaully has nothing to do with them - it's just a high-paced tune that spins you around until you start feeling a little dizzy - think of a carnival attraction like the Octopus. It's also mixed somewhat quietly. It sounds fairly good on the SB-Live - at least as good as it did on the Awe-32. For a different take on the piece, try "Spindizzy 2" on the next page. 140 Cool Descent (4:28) 52K This was named for the descending note in the middle of the bar. Mid-tempo pop without great depth of meaning. It's not basd on the SB-L:ive, but needs a slight remix to get the instruments back into balance - and (as is often the case), the piano bass is a problem. 141 Kismet (7:58) 102K "Kismet" is another word for "fate" or "destiny". This a lightweight pop piece is without much in the way of such lofty meaning; it was named more for the events of the creative process that produced it, where at each step, the next seemed to follow inevitably from what had gone before. For a change, the chorus has far greater complexity than the verses. But it's a real toe-tapper, and sounds great on both the Awe-32 and the SB-Live, though it needs a slight remix at the end for the newer soundcard. 142 Dealing (5:36) 36K Every day, we're "dealing" - the word is used so many ways to mean such different things. Dealing with problems, Dealing out justice, Wheeling and Dealing, Dealing the cards, Doing the Deal.... This piece is all about the Deal. Sometimes it's agreement, sometimes it's a compromise, and sometime's it's not up to you at all. The tune has an unusual structure in that the chorus preceeds the verse. It's not a bad tune, and sounds excellent on the SB-Live - no remix required - but it's just not quite up to the same standards as those on the favorites list (to my ears at least. Other people like it, which is why it got the award!)