xxx: ME I GOT
A LOUSY ATTITUDE
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you gotta work thru those hard times...the challanges of life
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I think I have a pretty good attitude
xxx: I NEED
TO WORK ON IT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that is why I want to teach
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
good for you
xxx: YOU GOT
A GREAT ATTITUDE
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
thanks Ken
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I am trying
xxx: I DONT
KNOW HOW YOIU DO IT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
when I was a kid in germany we had this Christmas carol
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and the words kinda stuck with me
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it does not take much to be happy
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but the one who is happy
MrSelfDevelopmnt: is king
xxx:: OH I
SEE
xxx:: I GET
IT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you gotta maintain that magic and wonder we had as children
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
when we had it
xxx:: I WANT
TO BE KING
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
before we somehow lost it
xxx: I WAS
DEPRESSED AS A CHILD
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
just don't let the problem and troubles get you down
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
sorry buddy
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
remember, everything has reasons
xxx: YOU
THINK SO
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I know so
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
absolutely
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it does not come from nowhere
xxx: ONE TIME
I TOOK A LOT OF ILLEGAL DRUGS AND SAW JESUS
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
really
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
well garsh darn it
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
lol
xxx: IT STAYS
WITH ME TO THIS DAY
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
how and when was that
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I bet
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
tell me about it
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I don't mean to pry
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
just very interested
xxx: JESUS
MADE ME TO UNDERSTAND WHY THE WORLD WAS CREATED
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
oh please,,......tell me
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
yes
xxx: HE HELD
ME AND I FELT GODS' INFINITE LOVE . IT WAS LOVE BEYONE REASON BUT I UNDERSTOOD
. I TOLD JESUS THAT I HAD TO GET BACK TO THE WORLD TO TELL EVERYONE
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
hey there, you are on a mission then
xxx: I GUESS
SO . JESUS WAS ALL LIGHT WITHOUT ANY SHADOW
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and..what happened???
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
wow
xxx: WELL AT
FIRST I WAS IN ROOMS THAT WAS DIFFERENT COLORS
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
ok
xxx: IT WAS
NICE BUT I SENSE SOMETHING MISSING
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
yes
xxx: THAN I
SAW A PIN PRICK OF LIGHT
xxx: I WILL
MYSELF TOWARD IT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and
xxx: THE
LIGHT GREW STRRONGER AND THAN THERE WAS JESUS . HE WAS THE LIGHT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
wow
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
how long was that ago????
xxx: WE TALKED
BUT NOT IN WORDS WITH OUR MOUTHS BUT HE HELD ME IN HIS LAP AND LET ME FEEL THE
LOVE THAT CREATED EVERYTHING
xxx:: 30 YEARS
AGO BUT ITS LIKE YESTERDAY FOR ME
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
wow
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
what an experience
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and..what have you learned from it????
xxx: I REALLY
TOOK A LOT OF DRUGS . MAYBE I TOOK TOO MUCH AND DIED . I DONT' KNOW . BUT I
THINK ABOUT IT OFTEN . ESSPECIALLY WHEN IM' DEPRESSED
xxx: GODS'
INFINITE LOVE FOR US
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you should feel the love Ken and let it fill you up
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
right
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I kind of feel the same way
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and infinite love for people
xxx: REALLY .
YOU BELIEVE IN JESUS ?
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I believe in life
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and love
xxx: BUT WHAT
ABOUT GOD ?
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I always had a problem with the biblical account of creation , and Jesus, and
sin
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I can tell you though what I believe
xxx: CREATION
IS A MYTH . WHEN I SAW JESUS HE DIDNT' MENTION IT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
yeah
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I agree
xxx: WHAT DO
YOU BELIEVE ?
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that people sin by having a very wrong sense of power
xxx: DO YOU
BELIEVE IN A AFTER LIFE ?
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
actually,
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I don't really care about that
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I think the meaning of life is life itself
xxx: I
UNDERSTAND
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
therefore the full development and growth shoud be the focus
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
unlike what has been happening so far
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
power has priority over people
xxx: BUT TO
WHAT PURPOSE ?
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
to what purpose?
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
life is purpose
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
just look around
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
look at every plant and animal, look at our wonderful nature, or what is left
of it
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it is all very purposeful
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that was until man came and messed it up
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
with his ignorance and greed
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and hunger for power
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
very sad
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
even how we grow up
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
how unfree, we are controlled, learn for the system
xxx: THERE
WAS A TIME WHEN MAN HAD VERY LITTLE INPACT ON THE WORLD
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
well..that shure changed
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
once we transcended our natural ties with nature
xxx: YEAH
WERE LIKE A CANCER TO THE WORLD
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
interesting here that this goes together with the bibical account of man being
thrown out of paradise
xxx: WE JUST
EAT IT AWAY
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
cause he ate from the tree of knowledge, he gained conscience
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but how we have used our conscience and free will
xxx:
YEAH
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and how we should use it
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that is what I am talking about
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
time to focus on life and people I think
xxx: I
UNDERSTAND .
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that is how in a small way we can redeem ourselves I believe
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
for the mess we have created
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we really don't deserve to live forever on this planet
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
cause we just don't understand what life is all about
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we are too busy
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we have develop this world, our environment, but not life
xxx: I THINK THE
EARTH CAN DO WITH US BEING HERE. THATS TRUE
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but not for much longer
xxx: I THINK
ONE DAY MAN WILL BE EXTINCT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
the last generation being able to live and die of old age might be born now
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
absolutely
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we destroy ourselves
xxx: MAN WILL
BE SPIRIT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
aliens from other planets must think of us as very stupid
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
man will be no more
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
machines might take over
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
who knows
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
al that matters that we have time to make a difference
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and the time is now
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
when I was a kid, I was sitting one day at the breakfast table
xxx: OK
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
while my dad was reading the paper
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and there was a picture of this poor little african girl
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and I asked my mom very naively, like kids do at times
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
how come I am me and not her
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it really took a while for me to realize the depth of this question
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
so I developed this strong sense of compassion for all the troubles happening
to people all over the world
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I found out that we should be very thankful
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
for all the things we have
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that we have food
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
are healthy
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and whatever bad is happening to us
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it could be always worse
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we could have on leg missing
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
or having to search for food in trash cans
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
garsh , just imagine living like that
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
at least we have a chance
xxx: I LOST
MY SON AND IT DONT' GET NO WORST THAN THAT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
most people just struggle surviving
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
yeah..that must be tough
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I am so sorry to hear that
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
may I ask how
xxx: HE WAS
MURDERED
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
garsh..that is terrible
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
Ken..I realy feel for you
xxx: YES IT
DONT' GET NO WORST THAN THAT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
not that it really matters
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
still
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
he wanted you to go on
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and live out his great memory
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and not to give up on life
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
cause someone did something horrific
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you are important Ken
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we need you here among us
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you have a lot of love and goodness to share
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
don't let the bad stuff eat you from the inside
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
there is goodness in the world
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I know
xxx: I MISS
HIM . BUT THE OBITUARY SAID THAT HE WAS SURVIVED BY AND NAMED FAMILY MEMBERS
,IT ONLY SAID SURVIVED BY . IT DIDNT SAY WE WOULD BE HAPPY OR RICH ;JUST THAT
HE WAS SURVIVE BY . THAT WAS MY INSTRUCTIONS FROM SOCIETY
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that is strange
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but he lives on in your heart..your soul...your mind
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
let this give you strength
xxx: HE IS IN
HEAVEN
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
he is part of you
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and he will always be
xxx: MY
DAUGHTER SAW HIM IN VISION AND SHE SAYS HE IS VERY HAPPY
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
he is right her...with you
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
so he needs you to be happy too
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and while it is hard
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I only can begin to understand that
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I really can sympathize deeply with what you went thru
xxx: ANYWAY
ALL THESE THINGS SHAPE US AND MOLD US .PEOPLE ARENT' BORN MEAN . I THINK PEOPLE
GET MEAN BECAUSE THEY WERE HUMILATED IN THERE LIFE AT SOME POINT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
absolutely correct
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
very true
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I don't think people are innate evil..they learn to be this way
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
thru sociey....cruel conditions....no love in their life...no understanding
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it's very sad
xxx: AND THE
HUMILATION JUST MADE THEM MEAN . I WAS HUMILATED AS A CHILD AND IT MADE ME MEAN
UNTIL I REALIZED THIS
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I can only begin to understand
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I felt a little humiliated going to school
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
kids calling you 4 eyes
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
making fun of you
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I know..this is only a weak example
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
still
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it is wrong
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and we call this normal child behavior
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we need to learn to respect...accept...appreciate and understand one another
xxx: IT
DOSENT.' MATTER HOW SMALL THE HUMILATION WHAT MATTERS IS HOW IT EFFECTS THE
PERSON
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
only then can we make this world a better place
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
right
xxx: I HOPE I
CAN MAKE A DIFFRENCE . I DONT' KNOW .
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
yes you can
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
be yourself..be alive...be happy....be genuine....that is all it takes
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
be loving
xxx: I USE TO
MAKE A DIFFERENCE BUT NOW IM' AT LOOSE
ENDS
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that is what we need
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you can get out of it
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
start a new
MrSelfDevelopmnt: it is never to late for that
xxx: ITS VERY
CONFUSING TO ME . MAKING A DIFFERENCE THAT IS .
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
well
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
you need to become well on the inside first
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
most people try to make a difference by doing things for others, charity..which
is great
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I think we can make the best difference
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
by becoming the most loving
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
genuine
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
caring
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
friendly
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
us we can be
xxx: I THINK
SO ,I GOT TO GET THE CURE . IM' CLINICALLY DEPRESSED . I HAVE TO GET WELL
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
hope I can be of any help
xxx: YOU ARE
OF GREAT HELP
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
thank you Ken
xxx: I GET
POSITIVE FEED BACK FROM SOMEONE WHO IS SUFFERING
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
cool
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but I don't wanna suffer anymore.I wann live
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
too long I have endured a crappy life
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
time has come to make things right
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
however hard it is
xxx: THIS IS
A HARD TIME FOR YOU . CHRIS SOMETIMES WE GOT TO SUFFER
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
time to stand up for yourself
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
well
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I already went thur the worst
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I can tell you stories
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
when I was so consumed with anger over my wife
xxx: YEAH I
BET
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
several years ago
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it was the worst
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I was soo immature then
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I have lots of guilt because of that
xxx: YOU WERE
PUSHED TOO FAR
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I have done my shares of mistakes
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but I let myself being pushed
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I have learned that
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that it was my choice
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I could have just accepted her for who she was
xxx: OH I SEE
WHAT YOU MEAN .
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but no
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I had to get anngry over her
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
tried to change her
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that is how I have learned about self-control
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
don't even try to control or change others
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
it most likely won't happen
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
begin by yourself
xxx: I
STOPPED TRYING TO CHANGE MY WIFE ABOUT 24 YRS AGO
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
whatever is going on around you
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
good for you
xxx: I JUST
ACCEPTED THINGS
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
such a waste of energy trying to change others
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
right
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
only then can we live with people on
the basis of who they really are
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and not trying to mold them into how we want them to
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
nobody wants that
xxx: SHE USED
TO DRINK AND I GET UPSET . THEN I JUST
STOPPED GETTING UPSET AND LET HER BE
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I wish I could turn back the hands of time
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I would have done it all very differently
xxx: OH MAN
SO DO I
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but life is all about learning from our mistakes
xxx:
SOMETIMES THE KNOWLEDGE ISNT' WORTH THE PAIN
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
no sense living in the past, hoping..wishing...if I just had done this
differently..will not make a damn difference...life is about the here and now
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
knowledge is important
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but more important is what we do with the knowledge
xxx: I RATHER
BE BLISSFULLY DUMB
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
hey
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
don't say that
xxx: LIKE
ADAM AND EVE BEFORE THEY GOT KICKED OUT OF THE GARDEN
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
well
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
they were unconscious
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
were one with nature
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
just like all the other animals
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
the beginning of man
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and at the same time...the downfall of mankind
xxx: YES
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I think there is a lesson to be learned here
xxx: SURE IS
.
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
yep
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
and i want to teach that lesson
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
quite an undertaking
xxx: BUT I
BELIEVE I AM NOT ACTING ALONE BUT COOPERATING WITH THE INVINCIBLE POWER OF A
LOVING GOD
xxx: AND ALSO
WITH TRUSTWORTHY HELPERS
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
great
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
so glad I met you
xxx: LIKEWISE
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
swell
xxx: IT GOOD
TO TALK THINGS OUT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
time to make a difference
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
absolutely
xxx: YOU CAN
DO IT
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
I think that one of the main problem when we grow up
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
is that nobody is really talking to us
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
that nobody is listening
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we are just bombarded with all this knowledge
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we are indoctrinated, expected to be obedient
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
but in a way, our human sprits are broken
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we loose our freedom to be alive
MrSelfDevelopmnt:
we become fearful and insecure, and loose our sense of being who we are on the
inside
Please take
me back to the conversations page
Please take me
back to the main page