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| No... ITCH NOT! Thank you Sean Connery! |
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| Moulder farted, hovering himself off of Billy and gliding over to Linzy, of course, using his fart-force. He looked at her in a pose exactly like his avatar and smirked. "I would just like to thank you for joining Fort Moulder. We will defeat Craig Nicholls." Moulder said plainly, and it was almost as if Moulder was going to sweep Linzy up into a powerful kiss that even the abyss couldn't produce, but instead, he pulled out a yellow rose and handed it to Linzy. "Friends?" He didn't wait for an answer however, as his fart-force started up again and he quickly blasted through the Hogwarts great hall rooftop, farting away into the abyss, leaving Billy the Power Ranger alone in the hall to fend for himself. ---------------------------------- Moulder stared darkly at Jamie. As if he were the Anti-Christ or as if he promised Moulder a date but just never went through with it. Which is exactly what happened. "You disgust me!" Moulder declared in a voice sounding like Sean Connery. "Itsch me you want! Itsch me!" He said gleefully yet spitefully as if his well toned muscles and abs were seeking fortune, and they were. "Oh I could never stay mad at you," Moulder cooed, as he farted nearer to Jamie and began to stroke his chin of flatulence. "But... you are with Craig's side. You bunch of SAVAGES! SAVAGES!" Then Moulder blasted away into one of his rages.... soooo angry that his fart-force was weakening, which caused him only to hover-fart away barely a few inches off the ground, stiletto heels dragging behind. ---------------------------------- Moulder immediately stopped hover-farting as he heard the sickeningly sweet voice of Craig Nicholls. The Craig Nicholls. The one in the great hall that was talking about sand. The one he was also at war with. With a mystifying yet seductive hip thrust, he farted over to Craig and planted a stiletto heel on his shoulder. Giving Craig quite a view up his leopard print skirt, he knew that Craig would be quite intoxicated, looking up his skirt he smiled toothily, as if Craig were the swamp moon. But he wasn't, and as soon as he realized it, he stopped smiling and gasped breathily. "SARAH!!!!!" He bellowed, ripping open his shirt to reveal his bacne and well toned muscles and abs. He wheezed, coughed, and with a flabberghasted flare of his nostrils...he rocketed out of the hall, using his fart-force as his passport...rocketing away into the evening sky to pay a visit to the swamp moon. Even if he would miss tea time with Peter in Never Never Land. ---------------------------------- Moulder jumped back into the room on a tropical kangaroo of homosexuality. Moulder looked at Jamie, knowing in his buns of steel that he was not a professor and was wondering why he was at the Professor's table. He waddled up to Jamie in his leopard heels and cracked his knuckled of pregnancy. He tipped Jamie's chin up so he could look deeply into his eyes. "Jamie...Jamie...Jamie... Last time I checked you weren't a professor....and last time I checked.... I wasn't wearing underpants. ---------------------------------- "Nicole." Moulder said softly, riding atop a rainbow colored pony in style and substance. He tore the sunglasses away from his face and gave her a million dollar smile that could be donated to greater causes such as charity and the food bank. "Nicole." Moulder repeated, the word dripping out of his mouth as if in a sewer drain. "Nicole..Nicole...I know you..." He smiled. "Your fatal attraction to me is... uncanny. Ya dig?" He asked as he held out his hand for her to take so she could ride his pony of glory. "You know what sucks?" He announced to the room, "A vacum." He paused for the moment of applause and laughter that he knew was his. "Yes a vacum," He bursted out, throwing off his army style jacket and throwing it at Nicole, causing her to faint. "Your fatal attraction to me is that of fatal attraction to a vacum and dirt. Do you understand, my love?" He smiled and ripped off the rest of his clothes, throwing them to Ivan Snape, causing him to faint. "Let us leave this unholy sanctuary... come..." |