| Chapter Four |
And with that Kayla ran up to him and hugged him. I could instantly see the sadness in his eyes fading away. "Hi Unckie Justin. I'm Kayla Elise Young. Justin sat her back down on the ground, taking her small hand in his. "It's nice to meet you too Kayla Elise Young." I knew that all this was weird and confusing for him. I had to give it time to sink in. So I turned to my daughter, "Kayla, come with me. We've gotta get you changed out of your school clothes. Chris is gonna be here soon. You do wanna go to the playground, don't you?" She immediately dropped her small bookbag by the couch and ran to her room. I looked at the gentlemen sitting in my living room, "If you'll please excuse me." And with that I was down the hall and in Kayla's room. Ten minutes later Justin and I were outside sitting on the balcony, alone. Lance and Lenny said that they had some "shopping" to get done. So there we were. He still wasn't speaking to me, so I silently led him onto the balcony, I always watched over Kayla as she played. He was standing up leaning against the railing, so I sat down in one of the chairs. "Justin, are you okay?" He slowly turned and looked at me. "I don't understand why you didn't tell me. Why?" I wasn't even sure if I knew how to answer his question. I looked back at Kayla playing with our next-door-neighbor. "I'm sorry. I don't know why. Plus you were always too busy to visit. I didn't want to trouble you with my life. I knew how much you were concentrating on your music. And I don't fault you for that. If it was me, I would have done the same thing." He looked away, "Where's her father?" I cringed at the thought of Kayla's father. "Umm....he's kind of in her life." I must have stressed "her life" too much. He looked at me strangely as he propped himself up against the railing. "He's not in both of your lives?" Justin looked at me longingly and softly touched my hand. "Michelle, I've got all the time in the world." Something was different. Maybe it was the way he said my name, but I couldn't figure it out. "Okay. He, Blake, I mean. Blake and I met through a friend. They were in a band together, and he was the lead singer. Nothing big, just a local band. He was a very smooth talker and before I knew it, we were dating. I was very caught up in him. Then he suddenly changed. He began telling me how bad of a girlfriend I was...." I faded off not wanting to finish, but I knew Justin wouldn't give up. "And what Chelle? He didn't hit you did he?" I looked into Justin's concerned eyes, he was urging me to continue. "No, he never physically abused me. But I'm not so sure about emotional abuse. For some reason, he loved to make fun of me. Then he started harping on the fact that I was a virgin. He would tell me that If I loved him, I would please him. He said that if I didn't do it, then he would leave me and wouldn't love me anymore." Justin slammed his hand down against the railing, "ASSHOLE!" But he had asked for the truth, and I was more than willing to tell him. "So, one night after a show he took me into the VIP room, and started again. I was only 16 at the time and I believed him. And nine months later I had Kayla. My angel was born on April 1st. He tried to deny her, saying I slept with everyone in Chesnee. but I took him to court, proved is paternity, and he is now paying child support. He comes by every once and a while to see her, but it's only because of his parents. They love Kayla, and I'm not going to punish them for his faults." I sat back, letting a tear fall from my eye. Justin kneeled in front of me. "I am so sorry Chelle Bells! I should have been here." I angrily stood up and walked inside, "You're right! You should have been here! Justin, you have no idea how bad I needed you. But you weren't here." I collapsed crying. I had never let myself admit that I needed him, but I just had. He picked me up and held me in his arms. "Michelle, I know. I screwed up and please forgive me. I've missed out on so much, don't push me away. Not now. Please." I looked up into his pleading eyes. He was being honest, I could feel it. |