He-Man: What ho, evil one!
Skeletor: Who you calling a ho!?
He-Man: Might I ask what you are doing at my castle door?
Skeletor: Your castle? Why do you have a castle with my face on it? I demand you give me the keys immediately!
He-Man: My architectural tastes are none of your concern. I am He-Man, protector of the land and lord of Castle Greyskull. I am not going to buy anything from you and I am not in the market for a new religion. If you really want to leave pamphlets or something just put them through the mailslot. It falls right in the recycling bin that way.
Skeletor: Look, I may be evil and all, but I resent you mistaking me for a Jehovah's witness! All I know is this place is my only shot at getting laid and I'm a takin' it!
He-Man: Okay fine. Come on in. I'll open the door. Just stand right in front of it.
Skeletor: You mean here?
He-Man: A little to the left.
Skeletor: OW! That hurt, you fucker!
Skeletor: Well I was easily defeated... damn. You win this time He-Man, but I'll be back! Mwahahahahahaha!... what am I so happy about? I just got my ass kicked by a door. Ah well, back to the dresser.
Skeletor: What the... Who detached my climbin' chain!?
Urd: That'll teach ya to try and show me your bone.
Skeletor: Damn. Now that I have no way back I don't even have a place to stand. The carpet's so weird, I can barely stand up straight for a minute before falling over. It seems I must conquer that castle faster than I thought.
TO BE CONTINUED...