Phronk's Guide to Laughing on the Internet

On the internet, especially when chatting in places such as IRC, it is often necessary to 'laugh'. This is usually done by typing a series of H's followed by a vowel, or, in extreme cases, by typing a dumb acronym. To outsiders, this may seem extremely stupid to pretend to laugh at someone on the other side of the world, but you will find that it is an important part of chatting and conversations often seem bare without it. However, too much can also ruin a perfectly good conversation. Of course, not everybody 'laughs' in the same way. People can mean different things with the same laugh. However, this guide presents a standard for laughing, and is pretty much what the majority of people (ie: me) mean when they do a certain laugh. Here it goes:

There are 5 basic types of H-E laughs:

"hehe"

Pronounced "hee hee", this is the simplest laugh possible. "That was amusing, but not outright hilarious." When in doubt, use this one. In more primitive cultures, this could be interpreted as a feminine, girly laugh. While this is fine if you are female, you will be looked down upon if you are male. However, do not be afraid to use it anyway, simply be happy in the fact that you are more advanced than this primitive group. For an intentional girly laugh, please see "tee hee".

"hehehe"

Pronounced "hee hee hee". A step up from Hehe. "That was witty and quite funny, so you deserve a long laugh." This laugh is used for good clean humour that is very funny. If you want to type "hehe" but think it deserves something more, use this. However, if the event in question was outright hilarious, please see the next laugh.

"hehehehehehehehheheheehe....{etc}"

Pronounced "hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee (you get the picture)", this is one of the most high-calibur laughs. This should be used when you think you should be laughing out loud, but you're not. Make sure you only perform this in extreme situations, or you will look like you are on crack.

"Heheh"

Ok, so you're probably looking at this one and saying "Hey, didn't we already cover this one?" No no, my friend, this one has an H at the end. This one is pronounced "Heh heh", and should be used when responding to somewhat dirty or insulting jokes and comments. Similar to Hehe, except tougher. This should be used on dirty jokes anywhere, or on ANY joke in a chat room that isn't clean and friendly (ie: one of those channels where every other word is swearing).

"Heh"

Ahhh, and now we come to the dreaded Heh. This is a bad, evil laugh that should ONLY be used in extreme situations. It can mean several things. When something bad has happened that is not really funny, but you want to acknowledge that you know it happened, use Heh. Here is an example of Heh in use:

	[Bob] My computer is wrecked because my brother tried putting a banana in 
	      the disk drive. :(

	[Jim] Heh

Another use for Heh is when something was not funny at all and you want to let the person know that. For example:

	[Bob] Did you hear the one about the chicken?  It crossed the road to 
	      get to the other side! Hahahahahahahah aren't I soooo funny?? 
	      hahahha!
	
	[Jim] Heh

As you can see, Heh is not a very pleasant laugh. Just to be safe, never use it. :P

"Haha"

Haha can have a few different meanings. Even though most people pronounce their real-life laughing "haha", it is not as common on the internet. [more on Haha to come]

Coming soon: LOL and other special laughs.

Dylan, a troubled young boy from outer Mongolia writes: "ROFL always reminds me of some lady with an accent saying 'Rolling on floor." (reffering to the fact that it stands for Rolling On Floor Laughing, without a T for "the")

'Floats', a kid from Oregon writes: "ROFL always reminds me of waffles."

Mike from Canada observes: "Have you noticed that the older people are, the more they use "LOL" ?"