His Wife

a CheckOutMyCoolStuff.com short story

Story origins: This story was birthed with a question I asked myself one day: “I wonder what God meant when he told David that he would not have withheld Bathsheba from him. I mean, was Uriah already destined for death? Would David have been able to have her without committing such a heinous sin? Then, I began to wonder: What would happen if a person faced the temptation to cheat, but held back and waited on God?” Here is my version of what might have happened.

Marlon had spent a good portion of his adult life trying not to be in love with Mrs. Vicki, but it was to no avail. He ached for her day and night, even though he had been a close confidant of her husband, the pastor, for years. His loyalty to the man was strong, but even so, the struggle continued.

He went over the litany with himself on a continual basis. She wasn’t his. She never would be. Often, he asked himself why he continued to bear the misery. If he moved away from town, he might forget her, but living here, that would never happen.

Yet, though leaving made sense, he thought to himself that her sink might clog, or a ladder might be needed, and she’d never ask for help. Mrs. Vicki was a strong woman, but she had a weakness, too. She didn’t want to bother people. So, she needed someone who just knew what to do for her, like he did. So, he kept coming by, day after day, breakfasting with a good man who made time to take care of every need in his congregation — except for the needs of his own wife.

Marlon sat at the pastor’s breakfast table and he could see that Mrs. Vicki tried to look cheerful for her husband and hide the pain she was feeling. He felt it, anyway. Nothing about her was unknown to him. Except the thrill of belonging to her – that would forever belong to a man who did not value what he had.

The church was small – the one redeeming thing about their situation. With all the time he dedicated to meetings, organization, and counseling the same few difficult members, Pastor hardly had time for a home life, so a bigger congregation would have been unthinkable.

His lack of a home life was obvious to Marlon – his lonely kids came looking for Marlon all the time, and rarely did they seek out the father they knew was too busy for them. On more than one occasion, Marlon had rebuked them for saying they wished he was their dad, but the reality was that Marlon loved those kids dearly, and he would gladly have taken the job. The entire job – including the role of being husband to Mrs. Vicki.

Sighing, he folded his napkin and smiled at her. She needed the encouragement today, he knew, for she was trying to find a good time to tell her husband that they were expecting a new baby. Marlon would have preferred that he not be the first to know, but last week when she almost fainted as he put a new seal in her toilet bowl assembly, he had threatened to tell her husband about her weakened state if she wouldn’t go with him to the hospital right away.

“It’s no emergency, Marlon,” she had said. “I’m in no danger. In fact, life is what’s come to me, not death. I’m going to have a new baby, that’s all.” He had been floored.

“Oh.” No other word had come to him. All he could envision at that moment was her pleasant face perspiring during the labor process, and he longed to be there to comfort her. He knew, somehow, that he could provide that to her in a way her husband could not, and yet he knew that his attraction to her was not simply based upon what he could give her. Like any man, he dreamed of what he might one day have. It began selfishly enough:

Back when Marlon had come to the neighborhood as a young, single man to take care of his mother, he found this church. He had decided that since the church was poor and he had an income from an inheritance, he would dedicate himself to volunteer work in the church. For hours each day, he had worked for the elderly minister, making repairs, cleaning toilets, and even helping him make sense of the tax exempt forms the state required.

It had been a good time for Marlon and he had grown spiritually – just in time for his burgeoning faith to be tested in a big way. The pastor retired and the church was left vacant, and he was asked to fill in at Bible study, though they would have a visiting preacher for the regular service. Marlon fulfilled the role required of him, but he was relieved when a new pastor came to live in the parsonage next door. Marlon had suspected that the infusion of new blood would stimulate the congregation, and as expected, they were excited about the changes to come.

One day, however, as Marlon sat to relax after hours of work fixing a skylight on the church roof, he saw a beautiful woman exit the house in a thin, silky nightgown too short for wearing out of doors. Her son, Brian, had run outside to cry, and she had come out to get him, since he was still very small and leaving him alone in this cold weather was unsafe. Besides, it was obvious by her demeanor that she had thought the neighborhood was all asleep.

Marlon had worked later than expected on the roof, and then when the task was complete, he had looked up at the sky and out over the town and decided to simply sit and contemplate – and pray. Now all thought of prayer, however, had fled from his mind. His eyes were drawn to the lovely woman and her tender ways with her young child.

Rather than scold, Vicki sat with her son on a swing and talked sweetly to him, allowing him to sob all over her already clingy nightgown. Marlon heard him say, “Daddy” and “time for me” and he knew what was happening. Pastor was breaking his son’s heart through his negligence, and Marlon couldn’t seem to stop him, though he had mentioned the pastor’s need of a break as often as he could. The young minister had shrugged it off, saying that he was too new at his post to slow down, and that time for rest would come later. Since then, years had passed, and that rest never came.

But that night, sitting on that rooftop, Marlon found it hard to focus on the child’s plight. He only had eyes for Mrs. Vicki. Still, Marlon realized that he was wrong to stare, and he finally pulled his eyes from the view.

Temptation had been overcome, but not before his heart had been gripped in a vise that never quite let go of him. Since then, he had worked hard to hide his feelings, and it looked like no one suspected, but his own heart was treacherous, prodding at him and urging him to tell her of his love. What might happen if he did so – his mind would reason – since she was so obviously vulnerable, and after all, Pastor was at fault here, not Marlon.

Marlon didn’t fall for the lies. He had realized that spending any more time up there would be an offense to God and to the young mother. So, he quickly climbed down the ladder and left, but, her image kept returning to his mind all night and all the next day. When he saw her again, it was all he could do to pull himself together and force his emotions back under his control.

Of course, as the years passed, though Pastor loved her, his mind seemed to increasingly be elsewhere. Yet, though his she appeared for a while to lose her spark, another baby came, and things seemed to perk up between them. For a while, Pastor stayed home two or three nights a week, and then, gradually, he returned to his previous schedule.

To Marlon, it soon became apparent that a baby or two would be no quick fix. Now, with a third on the way, he only wished there were something he could do for the lonely woman. He knew, however, that anything he might do would be wrong.

Once or twice, the thought of taking her far away came to him, he quickly shook it away. That would just add more regrets to her life. She didn’t need any additional sorrow. Besides, God would work this out – his faith in God’s sovereignty helped him continue to be a loyal friend to all and a stumbling block to none, and for that, he was grateful to God.

Somehow, the upcoming birth seemed to interrupt Marlon’s thoughts at the oddest times these days. Since he had heard about her pregnancy, he had even begun watching those baby stories on television to learn about the birth process. He wasn’t even sure why he was doing it – in fact, he felt like a nut, and he told himself often, “You’re a certifiable lunatic!”

Amazingly, all that learning came in handy, because Marlon really was there at the birth of her child. Her daughter was born at three in the morning while her husband was still driving home from a speaking engagement in another county. Finding herself in labor, alone, and scared, Vicki had called Marlon, and he quickly came. He took the kids to his mother, who shared a small house with him, and then he drove Vicki to the hospital.

The birth was short and uneventful, the doctor said, but Marlon could not have survived another minute of the four-hour ordeal. While she paled and grunted in pain, he watched and prayed, letting her take his hand, not tenderly as he might have desired, but in a strangling grip he would never have expected from a hand so tiny. Then, when the new baby slipped out into the world and the doctor asked if he wanted to cut the cord, he just stared at her — a beautiful, teeny little replica of her mother.

Marlon didn’t cut the cord. He didn’t even get to hold the baby, for then Pastor arrived and took his rightful place. Smiling at Marlon briefly in thanks, Vicki was quickly wrapped in Pastor’s embrace, and soon the little family was completely unaware of his presence in their midst. Thankful that the man was showing such enthusiasm and joy in his family today, Marlon exited the room. Vicki deserved it – every day – not just when she managed an extraordinary feat like childbirth. In fact, Marlon thought she was extraordinary even when she was just making toast.

Marlon prayed before wrapping himself in his blanket on his extra-long bed that night. “Lord, would you please help my friends? Help Vicki find comfort in her husband’s love during this post-birth period. Let him learn to show her how much he cares on a constant basis. And above all, Lord, help me to control my thoughts and feelings about this godly lady – that I might not sin against you or her.”

The next Sunday, pastor was back in the pulpit and his tired, pale wife, was once again in the front pew. Today, Pastor talked about the struggle to do right, and he used David and Bathsheba as an example. Marlon felt as if he was speaking directly to his heart.

Was it wrong for David to desire such a lovely woman? Yes, in that context, it was. However, what if David had seen her, become embarrassed and left the rooftop – simply praying that God might help him attain the desire of his heart? Maybe God would have given her to him, for it might have been that Uriah’s time to die had come — perhaps death might have taken him by another means. Now, that was not for David to wish or request, but his was only to trust that the God who allowed such desires either had an answer or would give him the grace to resist.

Now, let’s use a modern example. Let’s say a man is in love with his best friend’s girlfriend or wife. Perhaps God has chosen someone similar for that man, and perhaps that’s the reason for the attraction he feels for her. He should pray for the Lord’s leading in the area of romance, and wait upon the Lord for the answer.

This is not always the right thing to do, of course. Exceptions exist. For instance, let’s say that a man is attracted to a seven year old girl. Maybe his prayer might go more like this: “God, I ask you for the grace to change such longings.” And maybe his plans should include, for example, a tour with the Merchant Marine – or some other long trip far from children.

The congregation chuckled, but Marlon thought about it more seriously. “Lord,” he prayed, “I am sorry to have gotten myself into this situation, but I know one thing. I do not want a woman similar to Vicki. I want her. Still, since she is married, I ask you to give me the grace to handle these feelings. And Lord, if you want me for the merchant marine, please cure my fear of the sea.”

Chuckling himself now, Marlon raised his gaze and smiled upon the face of his friend. Pastor might not be much of a husband, in Marlon’s opinion, but he was surely a solid companion who had done the job of bringing Marlon closer to the Lord, who had taught him and shown him the meaning of service, and who continued to speak God’s word into his heart. “Oh, Lord, please help me not to judge my friend so harshly. He’s a good man; I – of all people – know it well.”

*************************************************************

The call came unexpectedly. One minute, he had been sleeping deeply, the next he was groggily reaching for a ringing phone. The words registered, and he began to weep even before the news fully penetrated his foggy brain. Pastor was gone.

Jumping up and grabbing his worn overalls, he rushed to the door. He could hardly find his shirt, and then he realized he was wearing it. He had only one thought: Vicki needed him. And right now, he needed to be there for her, too.

He immediately awakened his mother and asked her to be ready to help, and she insisted that they go together to Vicki’s house. His mom spent the rest of the night there while Marlon and Vicki headed to the hospital where pastor had been taken. “Vicki, tell me what happened,” he finally asked as they sat in a hallway waiting to talk to a doctor.

“He collapsed, is what they tell me. He wasn’t even home. He wasn’t home and I didn’t get to say goodbye.” Her sobs interrupted her speech, often stopping her between syllables, but somehow Marlon understood every word. He had always understood her.

Holding her now while she wept, he remembered the pastor’s final sermon in church, just this Sunday. Could this be God’s answer? He shuddered, unable, just now, to imagine anything good coming of the loss of his friend.

“I wanted him to stay home tonight. I argued with him for the first time in months. I told him he was wrong to go away so soon, when the baby was still so small. Why did he go?” She punched Marlon’s chest, probably unaware of her actions, and then she held him again, hiccupping between sobs as her tears subsided.

Vicki cried a lot over the following days and Marlon got to witness a progression of emotions as they seemed to overwhelm her and then subside for a bit, like ocean waves. During this time, the distraught young woman hardly accepted visitors, though Marlon and his mother always seemed to be welcome. The kids clung to his mother, Grace, and to Marlon, seeming to understand without needing to be told that their mother was in too much pain to be much help to them.

“I hate him. He left me alone with three kids—who will want me now?” Somehow, Marlon managed to check his words. This was not the time to express his feelings. That time would come, but for now, he just listened. She wept and said she didn’t hate him – she loved him – and then she hated him again.

It was painful to watch. Marlon’s heart hurt so much at times that he wondered at how she survived – she who felt it so much more deeply than even he could. His best friend had died, and he felt a huge void. He had known it would be this way, and yet it was worse than he could have imagined.

“Marlon, I am so grateful to you and your mother. Thanks for lending me your mom. She has a heart of gold. But it’s time she go back with you to her own house. I’m alright now.” Marlon knew that was far from the truth. The church had given her six months to leave the parsonage and she had no income, no family, and no desire to separate herself from her new baby to find a job. The six months were finally up and she was pulling away from everyone.

“What will I do?” she had said when she first heard the news. He had told her that his mother had some funds set aside for people in need, which was true. He just hadn’t told her that he was adding to those funds, tripling them. She only nodded, promising to accept whatever they offered. She had no other choice.

After he helped her unload the furniture in her new apartment, Marlon noticed that she was starting to look more like her old self. After four months, the pallor had left her cheeks, and now she seemed to be gaining back her old energy. She didn’t, however, seem quite the same woman. “Death will do that to you,” she said when he asked about her more somber attitude of late. “Come on,” he said. “You’re young.” She laughed.

They were moving boxes off of the dining room table so they could share the pizza that Marlon had ordered when she answered him. “I’ve got three children,” she said, as if that were enough of an explanation for him. He shook his head.

“That doesn’t matter. They’re great kids.” She snorted. “To you, maybe. You practically raised them.” He lowered his gaze. The time had come. He quietly said, “You think having three kids would keep anyone from wanting to marry you?” She lowered her eyes, the shock and confusion evident on her face.

“Come on, Vicki. Surely you didn’t miss all the signs.” She sniffed, and he could see that she was crying. “I’m sorry. I won’t talk about it anymore.” She laughed.

“Here I’ve been feeling so guilty because I was falling for you so soon after my husband’s death and you tell me you won’t talk about it?” She lifted her head. “I love you, Marlon.”

The nervous, unsure woman of a few months earlier returned. “But what will people think? I mean, my husband just died.” Then, staring up at him, she said, “Wait, you’re telling me you would have just dropped the subject?” It appeared she didn’t know whether to be angry or impressed with that. “Amazing!” was all she said.  Marlon touched her shoulder and his hand was comforting.

“I’ve been dropping the subject for a long, long time, Vicki.” He pulled her to him gently, stroking her hair. “Didn’t you know?” Vicki shook her head.

“I knew that you were loyal to us both, and I always felt you were special. But I just set it aside.” He lifted her chin to gaze into her eyes. “Until now?” She nodded again.

When they told his mother, she immediately said, “I’ll tell you what people will say if you go public with this: They’ll say you were having an affair before Pastor died.” Marlon’s jaw dropped. “No way!” She brushed him off, saying, “You two are planning on getting married six months after his death. Tell me what you would think.”

Vicki let go of his hand, realizing that Mom was right. “Avoid even the appearance of evil,” Vicki quoted from 1 Thessalonians 5:22. Mom nodded. Then she said, “So what will you do about it?” Vicki frowned and looked at Marlon. His expression mirrored hers and he said, “I don’t know.”

That night, Marlon couldn’t sleep. He found himself unable to imagine another few hours, much less years, without Vicki by his side. Still, he managed to wait until morning. Then, he showered quickly and shaved, dressing carefully after a long, lonely night. Then, he called her. When she answered, he simply said, “I need to see you. Meet me in the church.”

The church was the most logical place for them to go, since people expected them both to continue their work there in the pastor’s absence. Since Pastor’s death, she had not stopped her work of cleaning and decorating the sanctuary, and he had continued performing his varied tasks. During those brief times together, they had sometimes stopped to chat with one another during the past months, deepening their friendship and mutual respect. Now, Marlon had no doubt his love for her was based on more than a nameless attraction. He knew the woman behind the pretty face quite well, and he deeply loved her.

When she arrived, he ushered her into a dimly lit alcove and asked her for a kiss. She shook her head. “That’s not a safe idea in here. Anyone could come in and see us.” At this point, he didn’t care, but he held back, honoring her wishes. He would wait forever, if he had to, yet the words came, unbidden, “I don’t want to wait. Please, marry me now.”

He was amazed how quickly her “yes” came, and then he wasn’t, because as he reached for her, she backed away again. “I can’t,” she said, and her eyes showed a tortured expression similar to what he was feeling. Though he knew that their love was not based on lust alone, he also realized that their worry about appearances was nothing to their need to be close to one another.

Mom was not pleased with the direction their plans were taking. “Listen, I love you both, and you can do this if you must, but you will not subject the kids to humiliation. You know kids can be cruel.” They sagged visibly, realizing her words were absolutely right.

“Why not just move away?” she asked, bringing them instant relief. “Neither of you has ties to this city. Vicki, you followed your husband here, and Marlon, you came to look out for me. So why not move to Florida — Marlon can get us a house there, and my old bones are ready for the warmer weather, even if my sad heart will miss this old place.” Her eyes twinkled. She was up for an adventure, it appeared, and they were glad to comply.  

Two months later, Marlon and Vicki got off a plane with three children, headed to the courthouse, and began the process of becoming man and wife. “I love you,” he said as he held her hand. Ricky, the 9 year old said, “So you’re going to be my dad, now?” He smiled at the boy. “Yes, son, I am.” Vicki could only grin at them both. Somehow, though it had begun so strangely, she believed that their romance was right. God was in this union.

On their wedding day, they added a step to the ceremony. Asking the kids to come forward, they joined hands, praying over their youngsters, entrusting their future to God’s care. Then, they hurried out to a restaurant to share their first meal as a family.

Standing a little to the side, Mom had watched it all. She hadn’t said much, but her heart was full. She believed that God was going to do big things with this family. She could feel it.

And as her life faded into shadow, she believed that they would continue to shine the Light. Still, that end, she sensed, was not so near as it had seemed before the coming of these children into her world. Happily, she joined them in finishing off the meal and then heading over the hot asphalt in Marlon’s SUV to their new place.

They had always planned to live together, so they found a house with an added in-law suite to so that she might share their family life and also retain her privacy. She was eager to see it, since it was apparently already furnished and ready to be filled with activity. Her heart raced a bit as she looked at this road ahead, knowing that it, like all roads in life, would eventually twist, rise, turn, and fall, but in the end, it would lead them all Home.

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