Well, another boring Sunday has gone by.
I recently got a job at a KFC call center. Hah hah, laugh it up. My choices were limited. Either work at the KFC call center or be a dragon master. I couldn't work as a dragon master because I once fell off of my snow sled when I was 5 years old and cut my hand on a branch. I guess you could call it a "childhood trauma" that had "future repurcussions" on me today. So anyways, I recently got a job at a KFC call center.
My shift started around 4 o'clock. You're probably wondering what I did from the time I woke up until 4. It was pretty dull actualy. I had one of my crazy hallucinations and brutally murdered my goldfish, got sucked in to a secret realm and fought off an evil warlock, ate lunch at Burger King and bought a Star Wars watch, got sucked in to another secret realm, fought a crazed black man and then went home. I took a shower and then went to work.
There are quite a few good looking girls at my place of work. (Another reason why I didn't become a dragon master... Dragon master females are usualy butchy). Anyways, these girls keep my eyes busy while I take chicken orders for hours at a time. That's when it happened. It could have been one of my hallucinations, but then again, how could I have been sure? One of the girls I was so subtly staring at transformed into a centaur. (For those of you who are new to monsters, a centaur is a half human, half horse monster). Anyway, she turns around and asks me if I have a pen. I had a pen alright. I shoved it right into her eye. It went in very smoothly, with a slight squishy sound comming out of her eye. She began to roar like a wild beast, but I held the pen in place, stabbing the vicious eye.
That's when I got arrested.
I guess you're not aloud to slay monsters when you work for KFC. I was released a few hours later. My lawyer told the cops I needed a "psychological evaluation". Turns out I'm clinicaly insane. I can't see how that's possible, but apparently it's true. Anyways, the girl who's eye I stabbed wears an eye-patch now. She sort of looks like a pirate now...
Well, another boring Sunday has gone by.