What Is A Cop???
Cops are human (believe it or not) just like the rest of
us. They come in both sexes but mostly male. They also
come in various sizes. This sometimes depend on whether
you are looking for one that is hiding something,
however, they are mostly big.
Cops are found everywhere - on land, on the sea, in the
air, on horses, in cars, sometimes in your hair. In
spite of the fact that "you cant find one when you want
one", they are usually there when it counts the most.
The best way to get one is to pick up the phone.
Cops deliver lectures, babies, and bad news. They are
required to have the Wisdom of Solomon, the disposition
of a lamb and the muscle of steel and are often accused
of having a heart to match. He's the one who rings the
doorbell, swallows hard and announces the passing of a
loved one; then spends the rest of the day wondering
why he ever took such a "crummy" Job.
On TV, a cop is an oaf who couldn't find a bull fiddle
in a telephone booth. In real life he's expected to
find a little blond boy "about so High" in a crowd of
a half million people. In fiction, he gets help from
Private eyes, reporters, and " who-dun-it." In real
life, mostly all gets is "he didn't see nuttin'"
When he serves a summons, he's a monster. If he lets
you go, he's a doll. To little kids, he's either a
friend or a bogeyman, depending on how the parents
feel about it. He works "around the clock", split
shifts, Sundays and holidays, and it always kills him
when a joker says, "Hey, tomorrow is Election Day, I'm
off, lets go fishing" (that's the day he works twenty
four hours).
A cop is like the little girl who, when she was good
was very, very good, but, when she was bad, was horrid.
When a cop is good, "he's getting paid for it." When
he makes a mistake, "He's a grafter, and that goes for
the rest of them too." When he shoots a stick-up man
he's a hero except when the stick-up man is "only a
kid, anybody could have seen that."
Lots of them have homes, some of them covered with ivy,
but most of them covered with mortgages. If he drives
a big car, he's a chiseler, a little car, "who's he
kidding?" His credit is good; this is very helpful,
because his salary isn't. Cops raise lots of kids;
most of them belong to other people.
A cop sees more misery, bloodshed, trouble, and sunrises
than the average person. Like the postman, cops must
also be out in all kinds of weather. His uniform
changes with the climate, but his outlook on life
remains the same: mostly a blank, but hoping for a
better world.
Cops like days off, vacations, and coffee. They don't
like auto horns, family fights, and anonymous letter
writers. They have unions, but they can't strike. They
must be impartial, courteous, and always remember the
slogan "At your service." This is sometimes hard,
especially when a character reminds him, "I'm a
taxpayer, I pay your salary."
Cops get medals for saving lives, stopping runaway
horses, and shooting it out with bandits (once in a
while his widow gets the medal). But sometimes, the
most rewarding moment comes when, after some small
kindness to an older person, he fills the warm
handclasp, looks into grateful eyes and hears, "Thank
you and God bless you son.
Author Unknown
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