The first initial bond in a person's life starts in the mother's womb. A mother has a natural bond with her unborn child. If the mother is a survivor of abuse and has never received a bond from her mother, she may not be able to bond with her unborn child. Or, if the child is unwanted.
When a child's emotional needs are not met after the child is born and growing, Borderline personality disorder develops within the child. It is a very painful disorder. Babies and children need love and nurturing.
Everyone needs to bond, it is how we as humans are made. God made us to need and depend on our parents as infants and children. Sometimes parents believe if they feed, clothe, and shelter their children, that they are meeting their needs. As I meet and speak with other survivors, I realize how extremely important it is to have an emotional bond with parents, and also how vital it is to have emotional and nurturing needs met in a child. Also when no bonding takes place between a child and his/her parents, when the child develops unhealthy bonds, an addiction to that bond takes place. It results in a very painful and obsessive addiction.
As a survivor with many personalities, there are many types of bonding that takes place within a survivor of DID. Some personalities will bond to people who abuse them, many times in the same way that part was abused themselves. That is mainly due to the lies that the part learns about themselves from the first episodes of the type of abuse that part endured.
A child who was sexually abused will believe they are dirty, and will be filled with shame and believe it is all their fault, and that they did something to cause it. As they child grows up, many of times they will be drawn to men/women who use them, and/or hurt them sexually also. A bond often developes between the survivor and the person who is using/abusing them, an unhealthy sexual bond.
When I learned that there were dark alters inside my systems of alters, I wanted to die. I could not understand why or how parts inside could have a bond with satan and darkness. When a child is raised and taught that satan was abused by God and kicked out of Heaven and the child him or herself has been abused, the child can identify with the abuse they were taught that satan endured from God. This forms a bond between the child and satan in the child's eyes and heart. He/she has someone they can relate to who has been abused also. Satanists know this and use this against children all the time.
Also, sometimes alters bond with satan because that is all that they know - evil. It is all that they have seen and this is very common in SRA survivors.
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