Item #8: Kisses you before he leaves you to go somewhere.

I was sleeping that morning when Eric left, no good-bye and if a good-bye kiss happened, I knew my blissful slumber never made me realize. I fully intended on telling him that I'd be having lunch with Billy that afternoon. It wasn't like I was cheating on my fiancéé, right? I was just having lunch with a very interesting, understanding, not to mention perfect-like, individual.

Now, I haven't been to church in some years and I really don't believe on this whole sinning thing, but I am almost positive it says nowhere in the Bible, "Thou shalt not go to lunch with the guitar player of the band your fiancé is working with." No. See, even God was smart enough to know that my little lunch was not a sin.

I made sure that thought was lodged in my mind all morning and through out the extensive lunch.

When I say extensive, I mean extensive. Lunch is supposed to range anywhere from thirty minutes to maybe, at the most, ninety minutes. Nope. Not this lunch. This lunch Billy and I were in the ball park of something like two or three hours.

No, we were not eating the whole time. No, we were not flirting too much. No, we did not kiss. No, we did not share long, intense gazes across the table. It was lunch for fuck's sake, not a romantic movie. We ate, we talked, we laughed, and in the moments when both our mouths were full of food, I wondered how I'd ever tell Eric why the wedding wasn't happening.

The thought was worrisome so, needless to say, I chewed quickly.

Billy walked me back to the gallery after out three hours together in a crowded homey place two blocks away. I did what I did with all my guy friends, linked arms. He had strong arms. Not the kind of muscle-strong, but firm, I think, is a better word. I think it's from years behind a guitar. So, we walked, ever-so-slowly back to the gallery, arms linked. I'm sure at one point my head probably drifted onto his shoulder.

Now, I always linked arms with whom I was dating, but this time it just felt better. Our stride was much the same, unrushed. He, I could tell, wasn't looking forward to another day at the studio being critiqued and criticized. As for myself, I was not looking forward to what was brewing in the gallery that very moment.

"Jacey, baby," Gaylord cried, snatching my arm from Billy. "Lynn is a head hunter, and she's looking for you, darling!" His drama brought a smile to my worried face. After a day of just not turning up after lunch and a day of being overdue, my boss, Lynn, was screaming bloody murder and threatening my job. Hey, I'd fire my ass, too.

Billy looked down at me, smiling softly with compassion and laughter. "Are you going to be alright?" I melted. My arm was still linked through his. I wanted to scream 'no!', run off with him to Venice, live in sin, make love all day! I followed my head, however, and gave an adoring nod in his direction. Damn the head.

Item #20: Makes sure you're doing okay, and if you aren't, does everything in his power to make you do more than 'okay'.

"We should do this again, it's was...nice." I searched for words. It was so much more than nice! It was fantastic! It was romantic! It was...perfect. It really was.

A smile appeared even brighter on his pierced lips. "We should. I need to get outside of my house more often." I remembered him telling me where he lived. He had a house just out side the city, but didn't like to drive and ended up staying in hotels often when he was needed near Manhattan.

I smiled. "Hug?" His perfect lips shut slowly and the corners of his perfect mouth turned perfectly upward as his perfect arms gave me a perfect hug that, I wished, lasted until the very perfect end of imperfect time! I perfectly died.

Gaylord snatched my arms away, bid farewell to my perfect soul mate and dragged me inside where I would definitely be put to death by the ever dreadful Lynn.

"Jace!" Lynn screamed. I cringed at the screech in her raspy voice coming from the backroom. Heather ran from her post in a gallery far away to look at me as I walked in.

"She's pissed, you know. She's pissed." I nodded at the girl. Heather was obnoxiously obvious. "I hope she doesn't fire you." Her eyes shifted around the gallery. "I don't know who'd take your place. I won't like whoever will." I started to walk away, the horrible future that would happen in the backroom would most definitely be better than hearing Heather ramble on.

I opened the door, hearing Heather still talking on and on in the background. I looked back to see Gaylord roll his eyes and walk away from the babbler. "Lynn, you wanted to talk to me!"

"Goddammit, Jace!" She yelled. "You are fucking late. This is the second fucking day." She stood up from her chair and leaned on the desk. I counted the 'fucks'. Two. "Maybe I should fire your fucking ass! This never happened before you starting fucking that fucking big shot." Five. "Just because you are marrying a fucking big shot does not give you the fucking state of mind to fucking blow off your fucking job and go out and fuck him." Ten, wow. "One more time, Jace, and your mother fucking ass will be fucking banned from this place along with all your fucking photos. Do you understand all this fuck, Jace?" Fourteen. I nodded and secretly wished she'd even out the number to fifteen. "Get the fuck back to work." I smiled and walked out, shutting the door behind me.

Heather looked on with wide eyes as Gaylord approached me. I watched her scuttle across the floor and listened to her mary-janes scuff on the white tile. Gallery gossip.

"Sweety, how was it?" Gaylord asked as his arm slid around me. "Alright, but if I'm late one more time my mother fucking ass will be fucking banned from this place along with all my fucking photos." I laughed. "She said fuck fifteen times."

"Your not fired?" Heather whispered.

"No. I'm here to stay for now."

Her shoulders dropped with ease. "Good, because if I had to deal with someone new right away, I'd be so afraid." I bet Heather was one of those girls who would mumble the answers to herself during a test or even worse tell everyone else the answers during a test.

Item #3: Knows when to stop talking.

I nodded and walked back to my post with Gaylord leaving the babbler all to herself. She reminded me of Milton in Office Space. Hell, she even had the glasses for the role.

I sat down on a bench in the room. Gaylord sat next to me. "What's up, Jacey, baby?"

"Nothing much, G. What's going on in your world?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes and dismissed my question. "Jace, what's going on?"

My eyes shifted around the room. I shook my head and repeated myself, "Nothing much, G. What's going on in your world."

"Jace! I meant it! What's going on?"

I put my hands on his cleanly shaven face. It was tan, more so than myself. He'd go to the tanning booth sometimes after work and every so often during his lunch break. I never understood his divine need to achieve beauty through skin cancer. My philosophy was: if the sun's out, I'll go for a walk. Tanning just wasn't my thing.

"I don't know what you are talking about, Gaylord." I smushed his face together and batted it around in my hands.

"What's going on with the l-i-s-t?"

"Why did you spell 'list'?"

"I don't want the b-a-b-b-l-e-r to hear."

I nodded. It was understandable. "What do you want to know?"

"Is Billy...it?"

My eyes rolled upward into my head. "Oh, he's something alright."

His eye brows raised. "Something? Could you see yourself getting your f-u-c-k on with him?"

My jaw dropped. "Gaylord!" He gave me a just-stating-the-obvious look and pressed for a continuation. "I could see myself being with him for a long time."

He smiled and grabbed my hands. "Is he it, Jace?"

I shook my head. "I don't know, G. I really don't know." I looked at the picture a broken guitar. It had been my guitar, my first guitar. I smashed it to pieces when I heard my father and my step mom were going to have Caroline. When she was born, my step mom made me peace offering: new guitar in exchange for the love of my new little half sister. I was planning on saying no, but when Caroline grabbed my finger I nodded and fulfilled my half of the bargain. Two weeks later a new guitar was mine.

"You don't know?" He sighed.

I looked at the picture again. "I was never planning on meeting Billy." I was never planning on a little sister. "I was never planning on loving anyone more than Eric." I was never planning on loving a sister who wasn't made by both my parents. "I guess, G, I'm just hoping for right now, that Billy is it." I let out a deep breath. "All I can do is hope." Hope the list was right in choosing Billy and breaking Eric's heart.