| August 17th, 2003*3:34 pm. Depression sucks... sometimes I wish that i wasn't here at all. Then I come out from under that cloud that hung over me for weeks upon weeks and i realize how fortunate i truly am... *sigh* even so sometimes the world just seems so unfair and soo cruel and i want nothing to do with it... maybe I'm just over exagerating or something... I was on such a high for what seemed to be an eternity becuase I was accepted to Louisiana State University. Everyone was soo proud, from my LSu friends, to my sis and pop, to my hubby... it seemed soo great for something to go right for once instead of backfiring into my face as usual... i guess i spoiled myself that week- i dunno, maybe the cycle has a purpose... anyways... I was reading up on some "Conversation with God"(vol. 3) the other day and I realized how much I miss my Alex. Alex, now that was a great guy... he showed me alot of things- not just about the world but about myself... he was the brother I wanted instead of the one that i actually had. *LOL* He was my theropist, my teacher, and- most of all- my bud... Alex came into my life at a time were I was surrounded by problems that resulted from the retarded things that i had done for love... *sigh* I was soo naive then but anyways... He was part of my posse, my "homie G funks", my best friends... the " 3 mc's and One dj" = Marina, Monica, Me, and Alex... *grin* yup those where the days! Those days are gone but the memories remain. I think that my love for those people will never change... I may only see Marina + Monica a few times a year, and I may never see Alex again but I know that deep down we will always remember the truth in our words to each other... Mishi |
| *My Online Diary *By Mishi |