Shp

Looking for a Brave New World?

Then Vote for

The Stupid Hat Party!

The Stupid Hat Party is a bold new Political Party offering the students of The University of South Australia it's first real chance to make a difference to how USASA is run since it's inception!

Policies

Boy have we got policies! The Stupid Hat Party promises you the following:

- To lobby State and Federal Governments to abolish the wearing of skirts over pants!

- To make it mandatory for all Student Representatives, and the USASA Senior Management, to wear Stupid Hats at all times whilst discharging their duties!

- To make sure that the bountiful goodness that is cheese is made freely available to all students at the University of South Australia!

- To do absolutely nothing about issues of importance to Students!

- To dream up one hair brained scheme after another and then waste simply ludicrous amounts of money on them!

- To spend lots of time at The Exeter complaining about how hard it is serving The People!

Factions

We understand that to be a real political party, you need to have factions. Well, we've got more factions than you can poke a stick at! Get value for money with The Stupid Hat Party, we've got more factions than any other political party! See below for a faction breakdown!

- The Coalition for the People's Needs for Cheese: A Centre Left faction, whose dedication to cheese and comical headgear is the backbone of The Party.

- The United Machine for a Cheese based Republic: A Far Right faction of The Party. This faction advocates the use of Nuclear weapons as a deterrent to academic misconduct.

- People's Collective for Solidified Dairy Products: A faction that's more to Left than the Centre Left, but not quite as far Left as the Far Left Right of The Party. Frequently referred to as The Left Right Left.

- Women's Collective for bringing down The Male Patriarchy by the broad based distribution of Solidified Dairy Products: This faction of the Party is so far Left that in order to find them you need to take you own provisions and engage the services of a native guide.

- Disgruntled Militia for the Cultivation of Armpit Hair and Yoghurt: This faction is a splinter group from the Far Left Right of The Party. They are so far to the Left that they fell off the end and haven't been seen since. There is a small reward for their return.

- Unified Reformists for Stupid Hats: A Reformist faction within The Party, who want to see a return to the glory days of pure comical headgear. They're Right of The Left, and Left of The Right. As such we're not quite sure where they are, but we've got a search party looking.

How to Vote!

In order to vote you need to be a student presently enrolled at the University of South Australia. It would also probably help if you could read and write, though we are lead to believe that this is not compulsory. Show your student ID card to the nice person behind the desk and they will give you some ballot papers. Go to the one for "President" and then put the following numbers in the little boxes next to the names.

Bec Salvado 7

Bridget Pepper 8

(Women's Collective for Bringing down the Male Patriarchy by the mass distribution of Solidified Dairy Products)

(People's Collective for Solidified Dairy Products)

Carie Yip 9

(Unified Reformists for Stupid Hats)

John Olenich 16

(Sensible Candidate)

Daniel Lauro 17

(Sensible Candidate)

Laine Croser 6

(People?s Collective for Solidified Dairy Products)

Steven Ho 5

(United Machine for a Cheese based Republic)

Andrew Hurford 4

(United Machine for a Cheese based Republic)

Gemma Noone 2

(United Machine for a Cheese based Republic)

Kate Davies 10