| MR. FROGGY |
| My story begins like this... Everyone wanted something that belonged to my beloved son.. My sister died recently, I wanted something of hers to keep close to me.. It’s only natural.. But as a mom.. I couldn’t bear the thought of giving my son’s memories away.. I wanted to hold them as close as I could.. for as long as I could.. So I did .. So if you’re one of those people who asked, please forgive me… Read on & you’ll see why!!! When Sean was born we had a German Shepard named Sonny. This was Sean’s first pet and protector.. Sonny was stolen from us when Sean was 4. When Sean was 6, we moved to Dalepark. Sean’s pets then were parakeets, aquariums with fish and tanks with lizards and frogs.. He also tried to harbor mice but I made sure he got rid of those.. When Sean was a kid growing up, we’d spend a lot of time outdoors, swimming, fishing and camping. He loved nature and its surroundings. Metropark was at our backdoor. Frogs, toads, snakes and worms were always around living so close to the park.. Sean always found a frog and brought it home.. He and his friend Johnnie were the “frog finders.” If there was one around, they’d find it. I personally didn’t like frogs or toads. Recently Johnnie’s mom, Joanne, my best friend since childhood, remarried and had a beautiful outdoor wedding reception. It was hard for me to attend, being so close to my son’s death I forced myself. To my surprise Joanne and her kids put a picture of Sean out on the receiving table with the wedding cake.. They said “Sean was with us in spirit” which they believed he was.. Well, at the end of the night, Johnnie, now 20 years old, walked up to me and in his hands was this giant frog he just happened to find. It brought back so many memories. He also was standing by the table that had Sean’s picture.. I’m sure Johnnie didn’t plan it like that!!! I came home from vacation in October 2001 and to my surprise, Sean just had set up another tank that had tree frogs, newts and tadpoles in it.. This terrarium or tank was one of Sean’s belongings I thought I would be able to give someone in Sean’s memory because I don’t like spiders or crickets, and that is what these tiny creatures need to survive on.. Well I just couldn’t part with the tank because this was something my son loved. I carefully began a routine of every 2 days going to the condo to feed Sean’s pals and the fish in our aquarium. You see it was difficult for me to go home to live without Sean there so I stayed with my nephew, Christopher & his wife, Lisa and continued this routine for almost a year. As time went by, I learned to enjoy going home. I looked forward to looking after his tank. It somehow gave me peace and comfort. On the last Friday in April 2002, I went home to feed them and I noticed the tadpole looked different. It looked like a tadpole but his eyes were popping out. I was amazed for we never had a tadpole that lived this long. We had never seen the transformation process of a tadpole to a frog. On Sunday morning it looked like a frog but with a tail and still swimming but no legs or feet. Then Tuesday night he had little web feet, looked like a frog but still had this tail attached.. I was so amazed to see this happen.. The next day, Wednesday, May 1st and Sean’s 21st birthday. My day began with a 6:30 a.m. mass at St. Johns Cathedral downtown for my son.. Sean was remembered with his family and friends in attendance .. This was a tough day for me but having family and friends around made it much easier. Sean’s true friend, Amy, spent the day with me. We talked for hours, laughed, cried, hugged each other and together we shared memories that we will always hold close to our hearts. Around 4:00 p.m., we went to my condo and as I shut the door, we were startled by a noise. We walked toward the tank and to our surprise…. I had a little frog jumping around.. I couldn’t find his tail.. I assumed he was hungry and ate it.. From that day, he became my pet and my Mr. Froggy. My first thought was that I wish he could have been here to see the birth of his frog…..but… I believe that Sean knows about his frog and that he sent it to me to let me know he’s OK.. And to never forget him this day.. or any day… Be not afraid…To go on with my life…. maybe he thought it was time for me to. . A birth is a new life even if it comes in the way of a frog. I don’t think Sean would be upset with me if he knew Mr. Froggy ate the newts for lunch one day and a gold fish that I put in the tank.. Actually it was my fault, I had to adjust to feeding his big appetite. Mr. Froggy has it made now.. He is living like a PRINCE in a 55 gallon tank and eating good and soon to be celebrating his first birthday. I read that a bull frog could live twenty years in captivity. I know Mr. Froggy will be with me a very long time.. The year 2002 was a great big blur for me. I am now living back home, a big step for me and I know it was meant for me to hold onto this tank. So in conclusion, I’d like to say that I am now only beginning to live life without my son, Sean. I cherish each memory. Some I keep in my heart and others I can share. If nothing else, these short stories help me heal….sharing Sean’s things and memories have helped me to help you!!! BUT I just can’t part with Mr. Froggy……...can you blame me!!!!???? P.S….. I’d like to add that one day recently I walked into a gift store and the first thing I saw on the shelf was a frog sitting on a angel’s lap. It was meant for me to have and buy .. I never in a million years would put a frog and an angel together and you wouldn‘t either. This is another sign from God and Sean that they are watching over me.... Patti xxooxx 2-2003 |
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When a love one dies.. your heart gets broken in pieces.. But when your child dies.. You lose everything.. You grieve… and wonder if you’ll ever stop.. For twenty years he was my heart and soul…. |
| If you like to share your thoughts or comments, please send them to me. If you like I can post them on this page. |
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| MOTHER'S DAY May 18th, 2003 My morning started with 8:00 mass at St Monica's. The day before I tried to talk myself out of going to Sunday mass and I was going to go Saturday evening but I never made it there. I knew if I went on Sunday, Father would make all the Moms stand up to give them a special blessing for Mother's Day. My tears of joy and sadness flowed last year and I didn't want it to happen again. I figured Saturday was a way out for me. When I woke up on Sunday, I didn't even think about what day it was and I did my usual routine of going to 8:00 mass..Father John did his usual mass. He did wish all the mom's a Happy Mother's Day when mass started.. I felt fine... I am a Mom.... Father John starts his homily. I thought I was hearing things. His homily is about "A Frog." I think I was the only one in church listening.. I couldn't believe what he was talking about.. A Frog... with a Tail... My heart was pounding.. I was overwhelmed.. I listened and learned. I know this story was meant for me to hear.. And when Father asked for all the mom's to stand up.. I stood up, strong and proud, with a heart filled with love and Sean right next to me with my Mom and sister Connie watching over and all saying "Happy Mother's Day.." |
| Picture of Mr. Froggy |
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| Thank You for Visiting.. I'm glad you're here! Don't Forget to sign Sean's Guest Book-- it means so much to me to have your comments. |
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| IN LOVING MEMORY MARY LAZZARA LICHT 1919-1995 CONNIE LICHT 1946-2003 SEAN STEPHEN KUKOLECK 1981-2001 |
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| "I'm An Angel Now" One night I cried to Jesus as I sat beneath the tree. I looked into the open sky and hoped He'd answer me. I'm lost, dear Lord, I've traveled far but still I seem to roam. Please light the way and lead me, Lord; I need to get back home. I told Him of my burdens and of the sadness in my heart~ that from His gracious love I'd never felt so far apart. Why did you take my child, Lord? I cannot understand! No longer can I touch his face or hold his hand. I'm angry Lord, I'm missing him. I'm drowning in my sorrow. Please help to heal my yesterday and face each new tomorrow. It was then I heard his gentle voice and felt his presence near. How I wanted so to hold him as I cried another tear. Sean said, "Mom, I'm an angel now, my spirit is free. I'm an angel now in heaven, so please don't cry for me. I was chosen by our Lord above and now I'm in His care. When you need me, look inside your heart. I promise to be there. No one can ever take away our bond with one another. For I'll always be your precious child as you will be my mother. So if you cannot find your way or the road to home seems far, Just look up to the Heavens and I'll be your guiding star." Sean said, "Mom, I'm an angel now, my spirit is free. I'm an angel now in Heaven ~ no need to cry for me." ~Author Unknown~ |
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| UPDATED:11-26-2008 |
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