murcury man stood up, and healed his wounds with his murcury juice. then he left his house, because he was hot, and cold at the same time. murcury had not been the same since his liver colapsed five years ago. not because of drink, but because his mother spoon fed him pure lead.
anyway, murcuy man climbed in the mucruy mobile and sped off down the road. black man began shouting at him, but mucury man was deaf so he could not hear him. as murcury man drove along, he put some music on. the music was great, because it was murcury man's fav album:
"a man killing a dog vol 5"
it was just the sounds of a man killing a dog. mucury man really liked it, because he was a sadistic bastard and hated dogs. mucury man did not know where he was going, he just thought a nice drive would clear his mind. mabye he could drive to the edge of the earth and jump off into oblivion!!!! instead he drove to bratford.
mucury man liked bratford. He didnt know why, just that it smelt abit like fish.
he went up to the man who gaurded the gates into bratford and said:
"hello. I would like to come into bratford."
the gaurd kicked murcury man in the testicles.
the he said:
"yes, wellcome to bratford. BIATCH!"
murcury man walked down the street, randomly eyeing up ladies, looking for someone to kill. but he could not find any midgits, so he instead walked up to a small child and kicked him in the head. as the head bled, murcury man laughed, like a frog dying
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH" said murcury man
but then murcury man fell in a vat of acid someone had left there. it burned thorugh his murcuy suit, quicker then a knife through a dog. did I say dog? I MEANT DOG!
so then he burned for a bit, before getting out and punching the kid in the face again, for being small and annoying
"ow, murcury man, you hit me! why? why would you do that?"
"because your small and annoying, you little wanker. where is your mother anyway?"
"She got hit by a cock in 1865" said the child, " and then it crushed her.
"oh im sorry." said murcury man, "lets go and have an ice cream, and then I will try to touch your ass. ok?"
"oh yes please murcury man!" said the child, "and then can we play space invaders five?"
"no, you fucking bitch!" said murcury man. he hit the child in the head, "shut the fuck up!"
"ow, murcury man! that hurt!
"yes, I know it did." said murcury man, "now lets go for that ice cream!"
"yay!" said the child.
murcury man slapped the child in the head.
"ha, tool" he said.