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Welcome to CRAP! Magazine! |
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Introducing: Charlotte Hopkins |
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Charlotte Facts! |
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Born : 29th June 1981
Weighs : Ask her and you might get a smack and we don't mean a pleasant one
Hair : Medium Length naturally brown but currently dyed red to stop herself from turning blond
Eyes : Did have 3 but thanks to the wonders of cosmetic surgery now has two both a light blue in colour.
Style : Depends on the situation. Dressed up Charlotte can look almost human.
Likes : Men (make sure you read that right MEN not WOMEN despite what some people might think), Ice Cream, Chocolate, Count Duckula, Dangermouse, A Team, Ab Fab, anti male jokes and supposedly "rubbish" music. |
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In this wonderful shot of Charlotte as a young baby, the first glimpse of Charlotte's character appears. Notice the determined look. She has since mastered putting the fear of God into people just by looking at them in a certain way. Many have tried and failed to stare out this determined little lady. Whilst recently demonstrating her "look" she was told that she looked like she'd been possessed. We at CRAP! Magazine! feel sorry for anyone who is given this look. |
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In this delightful shot of the two year old Charlotte you actually get to see her smile! This might come as a shock to readers as she is well known for being a "Grumpy sod". |
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Here Charlotte can be seen playing with one of her favourite childhood toys : Grandpa Smurf. This shot was taken before Charlotte discovered the joys of He-Man, Transformers and ripping the heads off Barbie Dolls. Although Charlotte did actually play with My Little Pony toys, this was mainly because they were good weapons for throwing at people. She was not your typical girlie girl. |
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Here a very young Charlotte can be seen relaxing in the garden of her parents semi detached manor house, with her older brother Christopher who we have previously featured in CRAP! Magazine! Chris has commented in recent years, that when asked if he would like a little brother or sister he should have asked for a train set. Unfortunately for the young Charlotte and Chris the photograhper failed to tell them about the attack of the killer daffodils. Luckily for the plucky young adventurers, tragedy did not strike and they lived to fight another battle against the evil plant overlords. |
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If you would like to see more from The Life and Times of Charlotte Hopkins then please click the link below. We at CRAP! Magazine! Would like to thank Charlotte for her co-operation despite the fact that she wrote this article herself. This page and subsequent pages were produced due to the threat of my brother producing one of his own and writing who knows what about me. At least this way I can make sure to some extent that my dark secrets remain secrets! Click on the link if you want to see more humilating and embarassing pictures of me. |
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Back to my homepage |
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Email me |
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Charlie Part II |
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