Height: 6'2" on a good day.
Weight: Fat............oh so very very fat.......
Position: Goalkeeper (maybe not a good choice due to lack of co-ordination/ catching/ shot stopping ability.) Allegedly only gets in the team because he is the manager and picks himself each week.
Interesting Fact: Erik likes to rub Kiwi Fruits into his scalp, claiming that it gives his hair an unrivalled glossy shine.
Height: 6'1"
Weight: Malnouirished
Position: Anywhere and everywhere. Jack of all trades. Master of none.
Interesting Fact: Charlie is from Egypt and regularly likes to dress up as a Pyramid and sit for hours on end being climbed on by tourists.
Height: Allegedly smaller than 'little' Si. This is still to be verified by an independent adjudicator.
Weight: TBC
Position: Midfield Dynamo
Interesting Fact: If you look at Indy from upside down he looks just like Brian Blessed.
Height: 6'0" (6'3" if you measure to the top of his hair)
Weight: Svelte
Position: Midfield Powerhouse
Interesting Fact: Ads is a massive fan of sadly defunct band B*witched. To show his loyal support for his fallen heores Ads can usually be found sporting the 'Double Denim' look of matching denim jeans and jacket.
Height: Knee high to a grasshopper
Weight: as much as 4 small dogs, possibly poodles
Position: Striker
Interesting Fact: Si loves discount clothes and will often be found browsing in the bargain bins in Matalan and TK Maxx in search of his next bargain. Previous finds have included a Fido Dido t-shirt, a Global Hypercolour vest and a pair of Fat Willy's Surf Shack jogging bottoms.
Height: 5'11" in heels
Weight: To be confirmed. Unreliable sources put it at around 18 stone.
Position: Everywhere. Seemingly all at once. Maybe due to mysterious teleporting skills.
Interesting Fact:Tom was actually born in Burkina Faso and hadn't seen a double decker bus until the age of 16 when he saw one in Chiswick whilst on an student exchange programme.
30th January vs. The Ecclesall Dynasty - Match postponed due to frozen pitch.
6th February vs. Wayland Rovers - WON 5-4
13th February vs. Hunter House Harriers - WON 3-1
20th February vs. Beadles Hand - Lost 4-3
27th February vs. Cool Runnings - Match postponed due to intense snowfall.
5th March vs. Weirdo Wanderers - WON 15-0
12th March vs. Barca-Loners - Lost 4-3
19th March Rearranged fixture vs. The Ecclesall Dynasty - WON 5-2
22nd March Rearranged fixture vs. Cool Runnings - Lost 8-4