JohnsStory

33 years. It's the story of a young man and what he experienced before his death.

At the age of 31, John was diagnosed with colon cancer that had already spread to his liver. The doctors told him if he lived three (3) months, it would be a miracle. Not only did he surpass the three months, he received a promotion and continued working until six months before his death, which was 2 and 1/2 years after his diagnosis. What
is written here are the events that occurred before his death which were read at his funeral...written by his wife, Joan, and his Mom, (me).
I hope you will read this to the end..

John was basically a private person. Not everyone got to know the same parts of John's personality, but the one thing that touched just about everyone, was his wonderfully 'weird' sense of humor. It was that sense of humor and the ability to laugh when things got tough that helped all of us get through these past months.

John never wanted people to feel sorry for him. He showed strength and courage and never looked back and said, "WHY ME?" Many times he would be so physically ill from the chemotherapy, but amazingly, in the midst of it, he'd find the most inappropriate mooment to crack a joke about the situation, as if to let me know that 'it would be OK'.

So many times people would ask me, "How can you deal with this?", or, "How can you handle all of this?" I can honestly say that much of my strength came from the strength John showd. How could I be weak when John was being so strong? Emotionally, we supported each other.

John also truly enjoyed working, took pride in working hard and doing a good job. It was very difficult for him for him to give up his job. He did not like to sit idle. But, once again, he never complained.

Generosity came easily to John. If there was something someone wanted or needed, he'd try to accomodate them. He enjoyed making people happy from something he had done.

It was a short time before Christmas (1993) when I was talking to John on the phone. During this period of time he was undergoing an intensive type of chemotherapy because the cancer had become very aggressive and the regular chemo he had recieved, no longer was effective. This treatment required him to consume enormous quantities of liquids in order to prevent dehydration.

As we were talking about various things, he said, "you should be here at night to see the glow from the angels". I asked, "what angels?" assuming he was referring to some sort of Christmas decorations. He replied, "My Guardian Angels....didn't I tell you? They've been with me for quite a while. I have one on each side of me." Then he added tht he could see the 'glow' from them with his peripheral vision and that at times, there were as many as four or five.

He continued telling me that it was kind of 'strange' because the angels would wake him up at night because THEY were thirsty, but HE was the one who had to consume the liquids to quench THEIR thirst.

I was amazed when he told me this and said, "Johnny, how come you haven't told me this before?" Well, he said he thought he had. I thanked him for telling me and told him I was overwhelmed at what he had just said. When he asked WHY, I told him that every morning and every evening when I proayed for him, I asked the LORD to send HIS angels to minister to him physically and spiritually, because the Bible said that God would give His angels charge over us. (And for me, it was confirmation of John's salvation...for the Bibile also says that angels minister to the HEIRS of SALVATION..and I had prayed with him to accept the Lord Jesus Christ as his Saviour) Well..... in John's words, he thought that was pretty "cool"

In February of '94 the chemotherapy was again failing and he was now in the hospital. About a week before he died, John requested to see us (family) individually. When I went into his hospital room, he motioned to me with his index finger to come closer to him, as his voice was very weak. He looked at me and said, "Mom, I don't have anything to leave you.... unless you want all those ugly shirts you've given to me as gifts... then he smiled.. I had to hold back the tears and then he said, 'but Mom, I do want to say thanks".. I looked at him quizically and asked, "thanks for what?" He smiled, and with a little twinkle in his eyes, he said, ......"for giving me Jesus. Mom, I'm ready to die now and I can't wait to see HIM" I asked him, "do you really love Him?" He smiled knowingly and nodded his head. At this point, I told him he had given me the greatest gift a child could give his mom, the assurance that he had accepted Christ as Saviour, and that our parting would only be a temporary one.

By March 14, his condition had deteriorated to the point that we
knew he was close to the end. He was experiencing addominal pain and 'itching' because of the renal failure.   While there, he looked at me with the innocence of a small child and asked me,
"Mom, how do I die?"
I told him I didn't know, but I told him when it was time, he would know and thought that maybe his angels would come for him.   Then he told me ..."All my angels are here in this room."
( At various times he would look around the room and toward the ceiling, then smile as if watching a movie that we couldn't see).
One time he pointed toward my husband and asked, "who is that?' I told him who it was and he said, "NO.... Who's the BIG GUY???" then added, 'oh, nevermind'.

When we left at 4pm, I told him to "hold on" that we would be back.
After we left, he was given one low dose of morphine for the pain. We returned at 9:30pm He nodded to let us know we were there.   We brought with us some Christian Worship tapes and were playing them softly. Each time the nurse came in, she would ask John if he needed any more pain medication .. and he would shake his head, NO.

The nurses marveled that he was so peaceful. It was now 2:45am, Tuesday, March 15.   At this time, I was holding his one hand and my other hand on his forehead. I leaned close and whispered into his ear, "Johnny, it's ok for you to go now. We'll be ok. I love you, and we WILL meet on the 'other side', it's alright to go."
(I, to this day, have NO idea why I said that to him at that time).
Within 15 minutes he had taken his last breath.