A Forensic Tale
By Michael Griffin and Tom Harris
(written using the "one-line" method)

    Once, when I was a small boy, my mother told me never to go into the old, abandoned house at the end of the street. Of course, being a small boy of typical capacity, I ignored my mother's admonition and proceeded to do the very opposite of what she told me. Boy, was I sorry that I didn't listen to her.
     I entered the house warily, and tried very hard to be quiet, but I still found myself making a great deal of noise. I shouldn't have worn those darn tap shoes! I sounded like Al Jolson and Mr.Ed doing a rhumba! By the time I realized that I should take off my shoes, it was too late; Someone had already heard me, and they were coming after me with a flashlight. I was scared so thoroughly that I wet my pants! Mom would be real mad when I got home, I thought, but it was no use worrying about that now!
     I hid behind a large chair covered with a sheet as the man with the flashlight searched frantically for me.
     "Boy, I know you're in here!", the man shouted in a deep, husky voice. I trembled in fear as the man searched the room, but somehow, miraculously, he didn't find me in my hidey-hole. This was mainly due to the fact that the man fell through a large opening in the wooden floor of the old house. Crashing into the basement, the man shrieked like a mad hen while I continued to hide myself as best I could. Soon, however, I realized that hiding was not the best idea, and I proceeded to flee to the safety of the great outdoors. Just in time, too, because as soon as I got outside, I heard the distinctive sound of police sirens approaching.
     "Oh no!", I said, "Mom's called the cops on me!"
To my great relief, the cop cars zoomed past me and spilled several officers into the house. I ran home as fast as my little legs would carry me. After I arrived home, my mother was glad to see me --
     "There's an infamous axe-murderer loose! I'm so glad you're safe!"
     That was the beginning of my interest in forensic science, and that leads me to my present vocation: Chief police medical advisor! My name is Quincy, and I'm played on TV by the fabulous actor, Jack Klugman... But anyway, my latest case involved a series of bizarre transvestite mailmen who committed violent and malicious acts.

(story incomplete)

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