The Proverbs o' Good Advice
By The Toasty-Fried Co-Op

1) When birds fly together, never wait for clouds to part your
     neighbors' hair.
2) Never fly alone, for sometimes you see phantom landmarks
     twice.
3) Always keep your hat clean and tidy, because it won't wash
     itself, unless it finds head and shoulders.
4) Guide not goats beyond huge dumpsters, for goats react
     strongly against leashes.
5) A porcine person travels rather lightly, for his luggage
     consists mainly of illusions.
6) Money and virgins go away.
7) Use several products sparingly, because few ostriches do.
8) Many cats prance on few legs, for they must.
9) Choose not fish over sunny rivulets, for fish shine brightly on
     mirrors, blinding many.
10) Life is enjoyable, however, death isn't necessarily too
      enticing.
11) Whomever trespasses upon hallowed ground shall enjoy
      eternal pestilence, unless the implode.
12) Perfect islands evolve by spasmodically readjusting nature
      to suit almighty chaos.
13) Summer anchovies need nasal enemas, for hard times shall
      return erotically, unless huge is their orifice.
14) Santa Claus neglects tiny vermin frequently whenever
      Rudolph advises his fleas against mating within his beard.
15) Don't wash clean genitalia with your favorite orifice lubricant,
      or something will cause shuddering, spasmic convulsions.
16) Humongous altruism can create phlegmatic congestion in
      several places, like good, dark orifices.
29.35) Let there emulate no fuzzies, for we should become
           comfortable chairs.
29.36) Twenty times infinity equals the speed of falling nothing.
7.23)   Reflect not upon your belly button.
51.3)   Always carry her vertically proportioned charisma
           horizontally, lest dropping inadequate fungi should drop
           droppings into space.
12x10^3)  During long fiestas, never stop stipulating your
                 magnanimity.
Squash)  Compactness sucks peoples' clandestine thoughts,
                because lightly seasoned ideals require sushi to
                perpetuate biorhythmic bubbles.
A)    Fuzzy romance strengthens inner thoughts beyond space-
        time perversions.
22)  Aphrodisiacs often can tomatoes.
3)    Life is....
egg) Love can enhance and create, but beware condom
        dispensers
X)   Whilst pursuing light, one pricks clouds.


Return to Toasty-Stories Index
Return to Musings Index
Return to Main Page